♂ Jack becomes Mr. Right in three steps: First, his Jill picks him more for husbanding and fathering potential than being ‘right’. Second, she shows gratitude for his providing, protecting, etc. Third, she coaches him into good husbanding and fathering. Her successes elevate him to Mr. Right, if he’s to get there.
♂ Jack is obvious. Commitment you hear, devotion you see.
♂ Except for emotions considered macho and manly, Jack doesn’t easily express his personal feelings. Jill’s prying for details turns him off.
♂ A long courtship without sex separates Jack the player from the Marrying Man. One values her for sex only and drops out when he doesn’t get it. The other values her for Self and stays to the end.
♂ At the cultural level where values are shaped, Jills lead, and Jacks follow. At the society level where values are implemented, the reverse occurs.
♂ As with all of us, Jack performs better when he lives for something bigger or someone higher than himself. Another reason why married men are more successful and live longer than their uncommitted, unattached male brothers.
“One values her for sex and drops out easily. ” They drop out easily also before sex when they don’t get it.
Your Highness easybreezy,
Thank you. My point was not clear, so I changed it to read: “One values her for sex only and drops out when he doesn’t get it.”
Guy
Steve Harvey was on oprah the other day, he wrote a book entitled”Think like a man, act like a lady” and he really could have made a difference, but then he went on to say just hold ou for sex for 90 days, after all. Ford and Chrysler put their employees on probation for 90 days, so if a guy makes it for 3 mos. by all means give him the cookie(his word for sex)
Princess Theresa,
If a man knows or even suspects she’s holding out for 90 days, he wants to make the time pass faster. This motivates him to spend less time with her, so she misses opportunities to demo her other attributes.
Time stops when with her, and he’s put on hold. It energizes his impatience, whereas being away from her means fewer thoughts of her and what he’s being denied by an arbitrary target. Staying away makes time move faster and confirms less time should be spent with her. Perhaps not consciously but subconsciously.
Don’t know the Harvey guy or his book. But by the title I can see why Oprah wanted to interview him. You can’t think like a man, and act like a lady. It’s called cognitive dissonance. Think like a man, and you act like a man. That’s what the feminists brought us.
My choice for working title might be: “Think like a pretty, highly feminine female and glory in it.” Subtitle: Make them chase you, not the other way around.”
Guy
Oh, I agree, I was just dissapointed , I thought oh here’s someone who’ll lay it on the line(kind of like you)but went on to say that women can give away after 90 days. By the way, he’s a commediene
Steve Harvey is a comedian. I understand, however, the name of the book. Women had better know what men are thinking, why they are thinking it, and how to deal with it. It doesn’t mean she becomes a man either mentally, physically, or sexually (ewwwww!!!).
I was, however, extremely disappointed with the 90 day recommendation. At the same time, Harvey is still a male. Why would he give up the male game by admitting that if women, en masse, stopped having premarital sex, would make men fall in line? He would be a Benedict Arnold to all malekind! No male in his right mind today would admit that publicly, with exception to their daughters.