Reorganized, clarified, and reissued as #1748.
Buy the WWNH book
Ladies, confused about men? This book ends it. Wives lose husbands, but each can prevent it. Bachelorettes lose boyfriends, but each can see it coming. Mates lose likeability, but each can reverse it. Exes lose dignity, but each can recover. So what if the pool of good men appears half empty? By learning the true nature of men, the pool appears half full and much more appealing and flexible to feminine influence
“He seeks the freedom to lay with her or play with her, to hunt or punt, rest or nest, read or lead, think or drink, farm or harm, glean or lean, produce of reproduce, or just do something new or exciting—especially in the spare time he earned from working at his job.”
Somehow brings to mind the old song “Don’t fence me in.” I guess guys need a lot of freedom.
Your Exceptionalness Princess Rita,
The essence of good marriage is this: He likes his freedom WITH her more than his freedom elsewhere. The sequence works like this: She earns his respect, which undergirds his love, which magnetizes her to him. Until, that is, she weakens the magnetic force by all manner of little things that kill his respect, such as nagging, belittling, acting masculine, competing with him, getting in his face, and otherwise depleting his storehouse of masculine significance.
Guy
Got here, as you recommended, your most gracious Guy. Having been through some of your blogs, sounds like this is a lot of work for us women, while the man merely has to be himself, assured of his ego.
What gives?
Your Highness Catnip,
For four decades women have been hearing about the faults of men magnified by political pressures, feminist inaccuracies and propaganda, and women listening only to women about men. Women created that image of men as incompetent mates, so I can’t correct it.
However, I can and do focus on WhatWomenNeverHear and present the true nature of both sexes. For example, you’ll find here that failure to understand how the male ego really works, instead of how feminists blame it for female problems, positions a woman to be dumped.
Guy
RE Respect: I feel like it takes the woman too much to earn respect and too little to lose it.
I am in the throes of an abusive man, a typical alpha male; yet, by and by, I’ve learned to hold of my own more. I’ve learned that abuse and dishonesty comes out from lack of respect. And yet, to man, respect is a given. An irrefutable force of nature. Or is it for a woman, respect is that rational thought process trumped by emotional ambivalence. Or is respect also born out of feelings that has no basis but some careless patterns established on one’s formative years…
Your Highness Catnip,
Are you seeking input from me? If so, I don’t understand what you’re seeking. Perhaps I intrude when uninvited and you were responding to Princess Rita. If I did, just disregard me.
Guy
If guys want so much freedom then what’s the point of marrying them?
Your Princesstial Highness Easybreezy,
The purpose is to fulfill a woman’s primary mission in life: Get a man to enjoy his freedom WITH her instead of AWAY from her, to enjoy and thereby honor her self-love to the extent she deserves. (Only partially tongue in cheek)
Guy
Well…in keeping with the spirit of this blog, we marry men for companionship, provision, fathering of our children, sex, the occasional compliment, status in society, (being someone’s wife trumps being an unpaid whore, in my opinion) and probably a myriad of other reasons which I can’t think of at the moment.
I’ve only been “broken up” from my “boyfriend” for a couple of weeks and I’m already yearning for another relationship. I think it’s the way God made us. It comes naturally, to me at least.
Hi rita!
Yes, I agree with you…. We are delicate ladies at heart… The only reason why we have all come to this blog is because how we go about getting our man is shrouded in confusion. But there is nothing wrong with the way we are.. NOTHING!
Now we learn how to present ourselves to men as in a way that advertises this message:
“With a woman like me, you will never have to worry that what you have to give up won’t be worth what you get in return. I’m the package deal. I will only add to your life- and take nothing away… If something is taken out of your life it is because YOU chose to do it of your own accord. …”
Everything I knew about men was lies. But now I have found a lot of truth… now conforming myself to those truths take practice, but it’s nothing to fret about because it is MY NATURE!
Yes, the conforming is not to something new but to something age old that we have been programmed to forget.
Maybe some women would consider me a phony but ever since I was a teen, when I’ve considered a man as “amore than a friend” material, I instinctively soften up my conversation a lot, talking less about work (which I (sadly)have a tendency to obsess on) and more about my children and my home. I think on some level, I’m trying to show the person that I’m a good woman. It goes without saying that makeup is applied and the clothes chosen with more care during this stage as well.
I guess Guy has been trying to tell us to keep doing these things (after all, false advertising isn’t very nice) even after we are married in order to keep our man and ourselves happy.
I love this sentence. So perfect. Now if I can only be this person!
“With a woman like me, you will never have to worry that what you have to give up won’t be worth what you get in return. I’m the package deal. I will only add to your life- and take nothing away…
I meant to say “more than a friend” rather than “amore than a friend” but a pretty cool Freudian slip nonetheless huh?