Her Highness Jessica at #802 also inquired about treating boyfriend as king. Article #803 described mistakes women make easily on the road of good intentions.
Jessica specifically asked: “How should she treat him BEFORE marriage?”
- Don’t think of how he should be treated. Think about how he should treat you, and then avoid making the mistakes cited in #803 and below.
Women should also keep these things in mind:
- Kingly treatment means he gets what he wants when he wants it. But worse, he learns to expect it and even expect more after marriage. After all, he’s due some special deference after the altar, right?
- Whether he’s after her or just sex, he expects to compete with her. She should keep the competition alive until after the altar. He should have to work for every step of progress he makes with her, have to prove himself worthy of her rather than vice versa. Kings never do that, so treating him prematurely as king short-circuits their path to or after the altar.
- It’s not what he gets as premarital king, it’s what he learns to expect. On the other hand, treating him as king after marriage meets his expectations, and he learns to appreciate what he gets rather than expect more.
- He will jump at the chance of being treated as her king. If the opportunity is denied him, it makes him look for ways to win her favor, which leads precisely to devotion.
- They both change after conquest and not for her good unless marriage came first.
- Prior to conquest, she should compete strongly with him to protect her virtue, virtual virginity, or actual virginity. She treats him as mere prince with potential but never certainty for capturing her.
- He marries expecting not to change and he doesn’t, so however she treats him before marriage is what he will expect afterward.
- When she treats him as king before marriage, she endorses his male dominance far beyond what she will be happy with in married life.
The series ends with this thought: Marriage comes after courtship, and his kingliness does too.