Boys and girls don’t know squat about kissing. Her Highness Cassy and friends with strong Christian values had guys initiate relationships, wait around for the first kiss, and then lose interest. She described the guys as treating first-kiss as a kiss-and-run conquest.
I have always presumed that moms or older sisters taught girls the details of kissing. Perhaps I’m wrong. So, let me at age 80 lay everything on the table.
- The younger generations copy movies and TV. Christian parents and teachers preach against it. The difference causes Cassy’s dilemma. It amounts to this: Girls know too little about kissing that bonds a couple. (Boys don’t care about bonding when kisses abound.)
- Girls bond by doing lovable things for boys. Boys bond by using their imagination to forecast how important, assess how likeable, and predict how promising a role she plays in his near-term future.
- Boys learn about kissing from movies, TV, and experience kissing girls that are eager to please boys. Boys expect girls to adopt the hippo-style kissing portrayed as the greatest and most desirable. In fact such kissing is the imaginative product of screen writers and directors to show that sex is okay and imminent. It has no bonding effect because it stimulates emotions that are transient in nature.
- Young Christian girls are taught otherwise. They’re not left to follow the pop culture crowd that copies media exhibitions. They’re taught to avoid wrong signals, erogenous connections, and especially passionate build-up. If they deliver first kisses closed-mouth and tight lipped, they send boys elsewhere.
- Tight lips sink ships. Expecting something more hippo-like, the boys lose interest. It’s not the girls’ kisses so much as the shock of facing the unexpected and not knowing how to handle someone so different.
Closed mouth and tight lips may satisfy parental teachings and religious beliefs as interpreted by individual girls. But it has no bonding effect and is consequently unnatural.
So, what’s the bonding way to kiss? See ya’ tomorrow at #1168.