- Lazy lovers arise from easy conquests. A long courtship and virtual virginity provide time together to gently express needs and expectations, to form intimate habits without sex and with only foreplay to interfere. This doesn’t mean he will become an ideal lover, but he will likely become better than ‘thank you, ma’m’.
- Whether you’re rejecting a man or splitting up, do it gracefully. Graciousness makes you different, feminine, and respectable. It confirms your independence and strength of character and generates respect and curiosity about you that stimulates imagination in other men.
- You can make your man more attentive, considerate, and perhaps devoted if you validate small things that he does around you, the home, the kids, and in public. However, words are the least effective way to validate manly behavior. Your deeds, non-verbals, and body language convey thoughts more effectively. Quite the opposite of women, he doesn’t like to be told even about simple duties and good deeds but to figure things out.
- Females learn about males by withholding sex. Nothing else teaches so well. As a man tries ever more conscientiously and deliberately to conquer a woman, she can spotlight his character, willingness to please her, and ability to fulfill her hopes and dreams. She learns to judge men as candidates for Mr. Right, Wrong, or GoodEnough.
1512. Friendly Reminders — #5
Filed under Dear daughter
Sir Guy, I especially appreciate your instruction for “rejecting or splitting up” gracefully and graciously. There is so much tendency toward brashness in our world, that a gracious manner stands out and can be effective in so many instances. I love what one writer has said (in contrast to the 1960′s, “I am woman. Hear me roar.”). She says “As women, we have the power of the whisper.”
Your Highness Sharon,
So many women are unaware of their immense social and domestic influence aka power. Less aware of their potential for greater influence. I must find a way to use “As women, we have the power of the whisper.”
Guy
“As women we have the power of the whisper.” Beautifully expressed!
I AM WOMAN HEAR ME ROAR…… came out in 1973: the same year as everything else anti family. Not the 1960s. The radical feminism STARTED in the Late 1960s though ..
Sir Guy, after finding your website a few months ago, I find I’m the poster child of what not to do. I’ve engaged in nearly every behavior you warn against, and find myself separated, living apart from my partner (we’re in married) with young children between us. Where do I begin to establish a positive relationship between us? Does one practice virtual virginity in this circumstance? Can you “start over” when it comes to intimate relationships?
Many thanks.
Your Highness Marie,
Welcome aboard. It’s a great day when another pretty woman joins us on this cruise to WhatWomenNeverHear.
I don’t understand this: “(we’re in married)” So, I’ll presume not married. Yes, the road to recovery lies with virtual virginity. The series of that name in the CONTENTS page describes how to do it. Be sure to figure out the rationale and explanation to justify you changing yourself and your life.
Guy
Sir Guy, I did indeed mean “not married”. A further question, as I am truly lost, do I announce intentions or ask his willingness to work and repair our relationship, or do I begin to work on these changes without saying a thing. And how do I navigate the relationship as both a woman he must earn, and as a “wife”, who shows appreciation and gratitude for him as a father?
Someone mentioned on another post how the highschool generation might be the ones to bring back the old school ways. I wouldn’t be so sure…as I sit down at a neighborhood cafe I listen as a young lady(15-16) sits with 3 of her male peers answering questions of who are the (how do I say politely) biggest “givers” in the school. She willing gives up information on what she knows about the other girls. The girl also listens as the boys tell her of all their exploits that have happened on and off campus. To say the least, I am disgusted.
It made me think of the idea of making business cards of your website and handing them out to young ladies. I would approach them and say ” You are a beautiful young lady. I hope you know that.” and hand the card and walk away.
Lady Kaikou
Also Sir Guy I think I might take you up on your offer for me to write about my experience on brightening my future and transitioning my mindset. Let me get situated. Thank you!
Lady Kaikou