Foreword: Female virtue is whatever men admire and not what women think it is. Manly love arises from a foundation of respect for the love object.
As primal urge eight of eight, primal modesty differentiates the sexes. Females are modest and the younger the more so. By their nature, males are not modest and are often immodest, but they are teachable. While not exactly vital for marital compatibility, the indirect influence of female modesty enhances any relationship for the female. Her modesty earns the respect of males even when they refuse to honor what she expects.
God designs, Nature endows, and hormones energize each female with instinctive and unique sensitivities and sensibilities, aka modesty. Someone else describes the causes and effects better than I ever could, and I urge all mothers and prospective mothers to read her book. A Return to Modesty by Wendy Shalit introduced me to the distinctiveness and uniqueness of the female nature. The subtitle, Discovering the Lost Virtue, cites its relevance for attracting men.
What makes modesty a virtue? Answer: Any woman insistently and persistently abiding female standards and expectations that men can neither fathom nor understand. They just adjust and honor whatever her modesty requires, because they respect her standing up for herself in spite of discouragement by others. Other factors help women generate masculine respect by first respecting the females’ primal modesty.
- Women begin life easily embarrassed. Learning to accept offense or suppress their natural sensibilities weakens their future influence with men.
- Men lack modesty but are respectful of female differences, as long as they are defended against masculine infringement.
- Men don’t embarrass easily and don’t like it when they are. Consequently, they learn early in life that females are very different and have much higher moral and ethical standards and sensibilities than males.
- Men don’t embarrass themselves, and they don’t feel good when they unintentionally embarrass a female. Oh, they grin or laugh or maybe even plan her discomfort. However, they adjust their behavior in the future, if she reflects deep and sincere modesty. If she sticks to her guns. If she continually refuses to accept offenses to her sense of decorum and standards of dignity and propriety.
- Except for those they disdain or seek to demean, men try to do better when they encounter a superior trait. Men consider distinctly female traits as superior to the degree they are upheld against the pressures of males.
- Some males seek to embarrass females. Adolescent males especially try to learn about life through one or more girls. They seek to conquer inhibitions, standards, and expectations. Conquering one’s modesty produces effects not unlike conquering her for sex. She loses his respect, if she ever had it. As she becomes more like males by weaning herself from embarrassing moments, she becomes less respectable to boys.
Modesty gives females their most powerful albeit indirect ‘weapon’ for curtailing the alleged privileges of male dominance. As they grow up, however, some females water down their modest instincts to be more acceptable to males. They give up that precious virtue and darken their own futures. Others choose to defend modesty standards and uphold the superior position of females in society.
Closely connected to a woman’s genetically implanted conviction that she’s pretty, she’s also modest. Both need regular reinforcement as essential to her well-being. Her sense of prettiness establishes her importance, and modesty protects it. Prettiness made attractive attracts men. Upholding modesty protects her from masculine excesses. Oh, not with physicality, but with insistent and persistent exhibiting and expecting others to honor her sense of modesty. With her own behavior, she trains men and conditions their thoughts to honor her female nature. Masculine respect follows.
Coming tomorrow, part 10 closes the series.