More About Boys
Learning how to love another person in childhood is still not enough to motivate a man to devote to a woman. Women shape their lives around love as a concept and belief. However, in order for men to dedicate and devote themselves to someone or something, two things are necessary: 1) They must respect the love object, and 2) they must believe in the promise that the love object holds for making them feel good about themselves.
Belief is a dominating force within masculinity. In order to believe, men must see that something or someone shows promise to brighten their lives, and holds promise to match or fit their self-interest. Following the development and firming up of beliefs, males dedicate and devote themselves to what they believe in—positively or negatively. For example:
- Boys demonstrate fondness and allegiance to a few individuals, when they believe in mother who taught them to love others.
- Boys devote to their own development, when they believe they can do most anything.
- Boys dedicate to serving others, when they believe that God wants them to.
- Boys dedicate to godly lives, when they believe that God holds more promise than humans do.
- Boys live selfish and self-centered lives, when they believe in themselves to the virtual exclusion of others.
The greater the intensity of a belief, the greater is a boy’s attachment and dedication to it. For example, when a boy believes deeply in a role model, he falls prey to manipulation and indoctrination. When a man believes more deeply in a woman than himself, he falls prey to her dominance.
Except during the passions of romantic love, men shortchange women on affection and other signs of emotional bonding. How they learn as boys to love and show respect and affection determines how they will do it as men.
Men shortchanging affection for women is the MAIN reason WOMEN should NEVER make the first move: kiss first, pick him up and drive him around ~which i see often~ etc. Ride in HIS car. If his is in the shop but he wants to take you out LET HIM DRIVE YOURS with you in it ladies.
Anon, Great advice. Thank you.
Sir Guy, I have a question. I heard a male acquaintance say that he tells his wife that after they have children, ‘she is demoted’. Does this statement reflect the way men think of their wives, families and order of importance, example child, then wife and so on. Please help decipher this in terms of man think.
Thank you as always.
Your Highness Lin,
Your acquaintance has been propagandized by men to strike back against Feminism. Natural man-think works simply and best with this rank structure. The role to the right reports to the role immediately to the left: Husband, wife, mother, father, children. Search for “rank structure” if you seek the details of what and how it works to breed compatibility.
Guy
Along similar lines, what are your thoughts on husbands calling their wife “Mom”? Mine does and I don’t care for it, but since he’s usually doing it in front of the kids I let it go. For the record, I never address him as “Dad,” but rather by his name or by another term of endearment proper to spouses.
Your Highness Anne,
In general, I’m opposed to husband calling wife “Mom.” Not that it’s so bad, but it lowers the husband to the level of the kids; he effectively disowns his role as her husband and weakens his role as head of the house. However, when he ‘pleads’ the kid’s case to get special consideration out of the mother (as father he ‘reports’ to her), it can keep the situation light as if he’s a faux lawyer.
However again, an unforeseen situation mitigates against husband calling her “Mom.” It generates much more friction than necessary when he has to fulfill his husbandly responsibility and it goes against the children’s wishes. That reason outweighs the previous paragraph in my mind. In effect the husband is lowering his authority as husband, and it’s contrary to natural self-interest for anyone to do that.
Guy
With whom does it generate friction when he has to fulfill his husbandly responsibilities which go against the children’s wishes? The wife or the children?
Your Highness Anne,
Generally friction among children. However, wife could suddenly and surprisingly take up their offense.
Guy
So Sir Guy, would it be fair to say that the acquaintance’s statement is highly disrespectful to his wife. At least that’s what I thought. I remember it made me cringe when I heard it because I share your opinion that the right order if a man is truly devoted to his wife is husband, wife and so on.
Your Highness Lin,
Disrespectful? Not unless she asked not to and he continued. I think it’s probably a well-intentioned nickname on his part that fits his ideas for making the family more compatible.
Guy