1970. Compatibility Axioms #371-380


NOTE: I can’t say it often enough. I have no objections to the legal, political, and economic progress made by women. Advancements were deserved long before they were won. I address Feminism only as the public fallout impacts social and domestic life among men and women.

371. The feminist challenge to millennia-old patriarchy is the fundamental cause of incompatibility. It separates the sexes, because it uses outside help in the form of public pressure to help prove women right and men wrong. Thus, Feminism leads women away from their natural strengths and relationship expertise. Misdirected, women give up their instinctive art of screening men until they become worthy of capture. Instead of dreaming of upgrading their Mr. Good Enough into Mr. Right during decades of living together, they try to ‘convert’ him immediately before or after marriage. [134]
372. Feminist-think calls for human nature to work backwards. Nowadays, women cooperate with each other for advice about men and unify support against them. They compete with their man for dominance. The first tends to prevent and the latter tends to melt compatibility. [134]
373. When women think and act like men, it transmutes into loss of the female genius that every couple needs to build longevity together. Romantic love fades faster. Sexual love becomes her manipulative tool. Enduring love doesn’t become mutual. Marital vows shrink in importance. One or both spouses become itchy to make a better go of it with someone else. [134]
374. The human competitive spirit and modern social pressures push women to act more like men—♫ I can do anything he can do better. ♫ Women imagine success and frustration arises at the lack of it. Frustration pushes them to escalate until they become the irresistible force trying to move the immovable object. Thus, womanly frustration generates greater manly stubbornness. [134]
375. A man’s love is founded on respect. And men respect women that persistently uphold values and standards that uplift women relative to men but not at the expense of men. It includes values and standards that men don’t initiate but value people who do. Femininity builds such respect, and Feminism discourages it. [135]
376. One woman says this. “Men need femininity. They call it ‘color in a black and white world.’ It heals their wounds, soothes their spirits and recharges their batteries. It is one of the things men look for in their wives; someone who makes them more powerful by feeding them with their femininity.” [‘Claudia’ as quoted in Keys to the Kingdom by Alison A. Armstrong, PAX Programs, Inc., p. 151] [135]
377. Femininity reflects intense femaleness with politics removed. It includes female traits that women rely on naturally to fulfill their hopes and dreams. Qualities such as feminine mystique, female modesty, religious morality, faithful monogamy, female-defined manners, female-friendly social standards, compassionate values, holy matrimony, and an eager-to-reveal emphasis against offense to a woman’s sensibilities. Femininity generates personal power dealing with men, because it enables women to reduce the hormone storms of male dominance—sometimes into submission or at least toleration. [135]
378. When the female gender institutionalizes the feminine qualities just cited, men learn to respect females more than males. Their unconditional respect for women provides the foundation for the conditional respect for one woman who eventually transmutes into the enduring love that sustains compatibility for life. A man’s enduring love of one woman isn’t all that strong, if he lacks respect for her gender. Old-school mothers made it work. Our forefathers built American greatness out of wifely inspirations, expectations, encouragements, and gratefulness shrouded in femininity. [135]
379. Our foremothers knew male dominance has to be outsmarted and outmaneuvered and not squelched obviously. They generated and sustained compatibility very differently than modern women. First, they competed with other women for a man with sex out of the picture. Sex was the bonus after he qualified as worthy to be her husband and father of her children. Second, they cooperated with their husband and revealed their respect and gratefulness by pleasing him. [135]
380.Further, our foremothers exploited their femaleness to clarify two very different and cooperative roles as a couple—separate responsibilities for each. His domain was outside the home, hers inside. He was chairman, she was CEO. With clearly separated roles, they balanced relationship power without outside influence. [135]

 

10 Comments

Filed under Feminism: OOPS!

10 responses to “1970. Compatibility Axioms #371-380

  1. Jessica

    Good Morning,

    I just want to personally say thank you ever so much for all of your informative and mind opening posst. I have learned so much and appreciate your work immensely. It is like a fathers timely advise to the fatherless… God bless you.

    Best, Jessica Prepetit

  2. Bee

    Dear Guy,

    I love that I found your blog and I read it all the time! Being a 23 year old woman, I grew up with feminism and I have noticed the negative effects of it on my generation. I’m so thankful for the advancements we’ve made as you stated but I don’t really agree with what feminism is now and I could never put into words why I felt that way until I started reading your blog. You didn’t put words in my mouth, you just helped me find the words to say about my position on feminism versus femininity, if that makes any sense.

    One of my best friends is getting married soon, and I found out she is not completely changing her last name but hyphenating her last name with her husband’s. For the past two months, she’s been worried about what to do about her last name. She was telling me how some married couples hyphenate both of their names or even make up a new last name for the both of them. For me, I always knew I would take my husband’s last name, so I couldn’t relate to her stress of choosing a last name. I asked her why wouldn’t she take her husband’s last name and doesn’t she want to have the same last name as her husband and any kids they have? She said that its 2014 and that’s not really an issue anymore. Do you have any articles about changing your maiden name or hyphenating it? I’m not going to try to change her mind. She made her choice and I’m respecting that but I really would like to know your opinion on not changing your last name and what a future husband’s perspective might be on that.

    Thank you!
    Bee

    Your Highness Bee,

    She favors fashion with hyphenation to reinforce her independence. He favors functionality to confirm that he’s top dog. That’s the nature of both, but she ignores his interest while imposing her will. Not a great start for her man. She can’t induce him to yield his independence by strengthening hers, so his reluctance to her ways begins before they marry.

    This is a likely outcome. Her future husband will always have that example of her lack of respect for his name and him. Having won the battle and failing to show ultimate respect for him, she will expect to win the future marital battles and thus add pressure on him to change. Aware of her insufficient respect, he will fight harder to win. Or, he changes and she gets bored with him. Either way, it foretells of temporary marriage.
    Guy

    • MLaRowe

      When my husband (a rather traditional fellow) found out that his ex-serious girlfriend only added her husband’s last name to hers he told me that it was another reason he was so grateful he married me. To a lot of men I believe it really does matter that you take his name.

  3. Fab stuff, as usual! Thank you, Sir Guy!

  4. Shanna

    Dear Mr. Guy

    I found your blog about a month ago and I can sincerely say it is changing my life for better. I read a least a couple entries each day. I love your saying “recovery is everything”. You teachings are so clear, so timely, and so very much needed. I love your saying “recovery is everything”. This blog is certainly helping me recover from the mistakes I’ve made in the past. God bless you Guy.

    Your Highness Shanna,
    Thank you. Welcome aboard, it’s a great day when another pretty woman joins us on this cruise to WhatWomenNeverHear.
    Guy

  5. boomer babe

    I`m so glad some young ladies are waking up about taking a mans last name. This actually came from the boomers. 20somethings could change this. Another pet peeve of mine is listing her name first: Jane & John Doe. It looks like Jane isnt with him. Besides that is what the minister says after he marries them: I PRESENT TO YOU MR & MRS JOHN DOE

    • Lady of the House

      In our son’s school directory, with the exception of my and my husband’s names (and of course, singles), every couple was presented as Jane and John Doe. I found it odd. When I submitted our names, I submitted John and Jane Doe, so the others must not have.

      I also like to refer to myself as Mrs. John Doe. Now I only see older ladies doing this.

      • boomer babe

        That is very cute! i wonder how old you are.. since I haven’t seen this since the late 1960’s in the Bay Area of CA. Mrs. John Doe :)

        • Lady of the House

          I’m in my late 30’s. I’m terribly old-fashioned, but I’m from the South! Things are different there in many ways.

  6. I thank you for this informative text .. appreciate it and keep on the good work

    Your Highness Sarah,
    Welcome aboard. It’s a great day when another pretty woman joins us on this cruise to WhatWomenNeverHear.
    Guy

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