Category Archives: feminine

2019. Female Blessings at Birth — 28-30


It’s the tenth group and I’m grateful for your earlier responses.

I continue taking the (currently 86) default attitudes for a test drive and your examination. (Bear with me awhile. I’m in the process of renaming Default Attitudes as Female Blessings from Birth.)

Please identify each item by its number and indicate true/false, as you see it. True means that a default item is part of female nature that women inherit at birth. It resonates in your heart as truth, even though you may never have thought of it.

False means that the item is missing completely from your heart, it’s something you learned during life, or you just don’t think women are born that way.

Where I explain or add, I could be wrong. Feel free to challenge me.

28. It comes so easy. I benefit from appreciating my man’s handiness, which also pleases him. [Guy adds: Male handiness is the birthright equivalent of female prettiness. Confirming each other in those domains is a mainstay of compatibility.]
29. I have my personality and roles wrapped up in the urge to be important to me and others. My self-respect and free will enable me to make the best choices to maximize benefits to all concerned. [Guy adds: Making herself important is a woman’s prime motivator in life. If she feels unimportant to her man, she tries harder. To the contrary, men tend to lose interest when they feel or are treated unimportantly by their woman.]
30. Even though it may be less than enjoyable for me, I enjoy praising husband’s sexual performance and ignoring whatever shortcomings I may detect. I like to fill the most vital role in his admiration of himself ‘in action’. It’s so essential to his sense of significance as compatible mate that I am unable to let my attitude or even discomfort be construed as disdain, that he lacks finesse, or that he doesn’t satisfy me. [Guy adds: Women learn from the opinion of others. Modern women tend to criticize first and deny that they can or even want to accept their man’s horizontal inadequacies. Since he can’t or doesn’t read her reactions and cater to her desires, he’s just not worth it. Yet, it seems that other parts of the female nature inherited at birth lead her to be tolerant, patient, and have hope of smoothing out his techniques and problems. Traits such as these. She’s eager to please. She seeks to be important to others. She appreciates her man’s undivided attention. She naturally bonds through intercourse, can swallow pride to please her man, uses patience and indirectness to influence her man, can accept being taken for granted, can accept being demeaned if her hopes and future aren’t threatened. Now, I’m not claiming that women should behave so favorably for him but at their expense. I’m claiming and ask you to tell me if I’m wrong; deep in a woman’s heart she knows that she should accommodate his sexual shortcomings more with hope and forgiveness than with criticism, corrections, or put downs. After all, sexual relations may seem to be the most obvious to him, but sex isn’t the primary ingredient of compatibility. IOW she quite naturally starts out wanting to please him in bed, even though later she may require something more favorable for her. Oh, and another thing. By praising at least some aspect of his performance in bed, it encourages him to perform even better, which brings about change however minor. With her care, patience, tenderheartedness, and understanding, she can coach in such a fashion as to ultimately bring changes that carry satisfying experiences for her. The self-fulfilling prophecy works when done well, but it takes time, patience, understanding, and indirectness—those things at which women as relationship experts excel quite naturally.]

Example for your response: “30-F ” works okay to reflect your opinion of false to that one item. Also, comments are welcome and desired if you take exception to anything.

Thank you for your opinions.

 

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2017. Female Blessings at Birth — 25-27


It’s the ninth group and I’m grateful for your responses.

I continue taking the (currently 86) default attitudes for a test drive and your examination. (Bear with me and some confusions I may create for awhile. I’m in the process of renaming Default Attitudes as Female Blessings from Birth.)

Please identify each item by its number and indicate true/false, as you see it. True means that a default item is part of female nature that women inherit at birth. False means that the item is missing completely from your heart or it’s something you learned during life, and so you have no reference point.

Where I explain or add, I could be wrong. Feel free to challenge me.

25. I grieve at the loss of a loved one with this firm conviction lodged in my heart. They would not have wanted me to have a single bad day of life if they thought their departure was the cause. [Guy adds: Recovery from grief arises out of setting new targets in life and forming new habits to hit those targets. You need to do it two ways: 1) Impose new actions on old behaviors such that you develop new habits—e.g., dress neater than you did before, eat less than previously, or fast one day a week in memory, and do it all as tribute. 2) Persuade yourself that your loved one would not disagree with your new habits and might even be pleased with your initiative to honor them. IOW, work off your grief by making yourself feel better about yourself for doing right things made right by you deciding the departed would be pleased with your tribute.]
26. I intuitively sense that ‘commitment’ is of the mind and mouth and not of the heart. I’ve confirmed in life that people—especially men—don’t truly obligate themselves with words as well as they do with deeds. [Guy explains: Actions that symbolize devotion program the human heart with devotion; words about devotion program the heart for sincerity at best but can disguise insincerity at worst. A person’s attitude reveals what likely resides in their heart but only their actions reflect it more accurately than words. Hidden agendas are much harder to disguise with actions than with words. Consequently, the best way to take the measure of a person is to judge from their attitude and character as made obvious by or easily presumed from their actions.]
27. I don’t really expect to get all the affection I crave, but better too little than too much. (My man may be short of providing all the affection I would like, but he provides enough and I’m glad our roles aren’t reversed such that I would be the one accused of giving too little.) [Guy adds: Too much affection shown by a man generates disrespect within the woman; he appears weak and therefore not good enough. Too much affection shown by a woman causes loss of respect by the man; she appears desperate and therefore weak or vice versa.]

Example for your response: “26-F ” works okay to reflect your opinion of false to that one item. Also, comments are welcome and desired if you take exception to anything.

Thank you for your opinions.

 

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2016. Female Blessings at Birth — 22-24


It’s the eighth group and I’m grateful for whatever feedback you send.

I continue taking the (currently 85) default attitudes for a test drive and your examination.

Please identify each item by its number and indicate true/false, as you see it. True means that a default item is part of female nature that women inherit at birth. False means that the item is missing completely from your heart or it’s something you learned during life, and so you have no reference point.

Where “Guy adds,” I could be wrong. Feel free to challenge my assumptions.

22. I am worthy of any man but only a few are worthy of me. [Guy adds: Unfortunately, her worthiness is too easily reversible in childhood. Parents are overly challenged and don’t treat children equally as persons but uniquely as boys and girls. It works for the better this way. Fathers pump up their daughters’ sense of self-worth and importance, which girls accept as relative to the source, one man representing all men. Mothers admire their sons’ achievements, which they accept as relative to the source, women. Then, in the romance marketplace, she automatically claims herself worthy and he willingly accepts it as challenge to win her. In the jargon of today, marriage works well with this start-up foundation. He thinks he married over his head and she knows that he did. It springs from natural impulses confirmed before puberty by parents.]
23. I have all the qualities I need to make one man earn me. (However, something inside also tells me I have to work daily to ‘tune up’ those qualities if I hope to keep the admiration of candidates for marriage. [Guy adds: And then, someday, at least one man will see you sufficiently virtuous that he becomes fascinated and devoted enough to see so much promise that he’s willing to yield his independence to capture you as wife.)
24. Something deep inside says I should, so I refuse to accept offenses to my feminine sensibilities. I spotlight my objections with critical words or by departing the scene. (No more f- or c- words, porn, or similar filth in my or children’s presence.) [Guy adds: Female sensibilities are personal. You can’t be wrong, so take action and neither complain nor explain, just act. It’s also a primary method by which women set standards to which men are expected to rise, which is one practice that produces a female-friendly society.]

Example for your response: “23-F ” works okay to reflect your opinion of false to that one item. Also, comments are welcome and desired if you take exception.

Thank you for your opinions.

 

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2015. Female Blessings at Birth — 19-21


It’s the seventh group and I’m grateful for whatever feedback you send.

I continue taking the (currently 85) default attitudes for a test drive and your examination.

Please identify each item by its number and indicate true/false, as you see it. True means that a default item is part of female nature that women inherit at birth. False means that the item is missing completely from your heart or something you learned during life.

Where “Guy adds,” I could be wrong. Feel free to challenge my assumptions.

19. I’m grateful that I have the ultimate ‘out’. I can seek God’s forgiveness to relieve my self-blame and guilt. It’s up to me to believe—first in God, second in His intention—that I’m forgiven and free to forget an incident or fault. [Guy adds: Born soft-hearted and taught to be tender-hearted, excess guilt hardens the female heart. Forgiveness relieves such guilt except when she lacks belief in God or faith in His forgiveness. Or, she refuses such forgiveness as undeserved, which just explains shortage of belief, faith, or both.]
20. I’m grateful to realize that morality and religion are essential and I can use them to brighten my future. Both serve us women in the process of civilizing boys, taming men, and domesticating husbands. [Guy adds: Men lack the natural interest that women have for morality and female-friendly religion. However, in order to live up to the expectations of mothers and mates, men adopt and use both. As women go so goes society; as morality and Western religions are promoted and popularized, so goes female-friendliness.]
21. I’m grateful to be in charge of my home. I accept responsibility for both a civil and well-disciplined household. Husband participates and backs me up when I need greater authority, which is almost never necessary as long as I do my best. (And anyway, when he’s invited to help, he goes too far or takes over.) [Guy adds: Husband provides the head and wife the heart of the home. The attitudes of family members flow out of the family heart and reflect her effectiveness. Blaming husband for dissatisfaction invites him to direct her efforts.]

Example for responses: “21-F ” works okay to reflect your opinion of false to that one item. Also, comments are welcome and desired if you take exception.

Thank you for your opinions.

 

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2013. Female Blessings at Birth — 16-18


It’s the sixth group and I’m grateful for whatever feedback you send.

I continue taking the (currently 85) default attitudes for a test drive and your examination.

Please identify each item by its number and indicate true/false, as you see it. True means that a default item is part of female nature that women inherit at birth. False means that the item is missing completely from your heart or something you learned during life.

Where “Guy explains,” I could be wrong. Feel free to challenge my assumptions of how women are motivated by virtues they inherit at birth.

16. I am capable of finding new ways almost every day by which to show and encourage my boyfriend that he must respect me for who I am, what I do, and especially what I refuse to do. [Guy explains: Her capability to enhance her future by protecting herself in the present arises out of her adaptable female nature and her near-constant thinking about her man. Her dedication to self-protection arises out of 1) her sense of relative importance with others. 2) The inherited-at-birth belief that she deserves respect as person, female, and girlfriend. 3) The natural expectation that boyfriend’s respect will be confirmed by his actions and reactions aimed at pleasing her. She intuits but social pressures encourage her to ignore this. If he can’t respect her wishes for chasteness before marriage, he won’t give too much respect for what she wishes after that event. IOW, refusing to yield before marriage earns the essential ingredient of masculine love, respect, that extends beyond the altar.]
17. I am grateful that men and I battle continually to see if a man conquers me for sex first or I conquer him for marriage. [Guy explains: Her heart is intuitively convinced: 1) Protecting her sexual assets is essential for the fulfillment of her girlhood hopes and dreams—although the connection is easily broken by social pressure. 2) Competing and directness best protect her interest before marriage but cooperating and indirectness serve her best after the altar. 3) Failing to yield to each man earns self-respect which also earns the respect of other men.]
18. I am vital to the people in my life and grateful that I can read and interpret the signs of it. [Guy explains: Her vitality arises out of her sense of importance in the lives of others. Her gratefulness arises out of her inherited-at-birth relationship expertise and ability to sense and interpret feedback.]

Example for responses: “17-F ” works okay to reflect your opinion of false to that one item. Also, comments are welcome and desired if you take exception.

Thank you for your opinions.

 

5 Comments

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2012. Female Blessings at Birth — 13-15


Fifth group and I thank you for offering your opinions.

I take the (currently 84) default attitudes for a test drive, to purify them with deeper analysis by more people. I request readers either confirm or deny each numbered item below with or without comment. To make it easier, I’m only posting three at a time.

Just reply to this article and identify each item by its number and indicate true/false. Accept each default as true to begin with. I will rewrite or delete as results of your analyses justify it.

True means that a default item is part of female nature that women inherit at birth. False means that the item is missing completely from your heart or is something you learned during life. If you learned an item during your life, try as best you can to determine if you actually learned it or just confirmed what already existed in your heart. [If learned or foreign to you, label the item False.]

13. I find solace knowing that I must show respect and gratitude for my husband above all others (and realize when I slow or stop that he will tend to wander). [Editor says: That expression of her nature has roots in her superior skill of adaptability, spirit of cooperation, and sense of importance serving someone else.]
14. I am capable more of giving that taking and am especially grateful for each opportunity to prove myself to myself. [Editor says: Her giving is rooted in her tender-heartedness and the gratefulness in her sense of importance.]
15. I am capable of finding new ways every day to show and encourage my husband that he is respected for who he is and what he does. [Editor says: That conviction arises out of a woman’s determination to brighten her future by constantly striving to improve it or at least keep it from dimming. Thus, she invests in her future by keep her man satisfied that he’s doing right by her.]

Example for responses: “14-T (comments if given)” works okay to reflect your opinion of true to that one item.

Thank you for your opinions.

 

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2011. Female Blessings at Birth — 10-12


Fourth group and I thank you for offering your opinions.

I take the (currently 84) default attitudes for a test drive, to purify them with deeper analysis by more people. I request readers either confirm or deny each numbered item below with or without comment. To make it easier, I’m only posting three at a time.

Just reply to this article and identify each item by its number and indicate true/false. Accept each default as true to begin with. I will rewrite or delete as results of your analyses justify it.

True means that a default item is part of female nature that women inherit at birth. False means that the item is missing completely from your heart or something you learned during life. If you learned an item during your life, try as best you can to determine if you actually learned it or just confirmed what already existed in your heart. [If learned or foreign to you, label the item False.]

10. I can convert the worth I see in others into value for my life and vice versa. [Editor says: She’s born to be adaptable, and mutual worth that is mutually appreciated breeds cooperation and confirms compatibility. Women, as the relationship experts, drive the compatibility bus.]
11. I depend on my husband by doing for him rather than expecting him to do for me. [Editor says: It enlarges her sense of self-importance to do for him, and he interprets it as respect and gratitude that he deserves. Reversed, ‘him doing for her’ all the time translates as his appreciation for her. Being appreciated is temporary to her and has little influence over events that add to her importance and shape her thinking about everything else. Consequently, she becomes much more influential when ‘she does for him’ rather than the reverse. She’s born to do it that way, the intuitive way.]
12. I don’t depend on my boyfriend. He does for me rather than me doing for him. [Editor says: It calls for the opposite reasoning of #11 above. His actions ‘doing for her’ program his heart toward devotion for her. Without actions to please himself for pleasing her, his heart doesn’t reprogram, his devotion doesn’t develop. Furthermore, conquest slows or stops his actions to please her to the same extent, because her yielding sex their first time together tells him that’s all he has to do. He now ‘owns’ their sex agenda so all is well in his world.]

Example for responses: “10-T (comments if given)” works okay to reflect your opinion of true to that one item.

Thank you for your opinions.

 

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2009. Female Blessings at Birth — 07-09


Third group and I thank you for offering your opinions.

I take the (currently 84) default attitudes for a test drive, to purify them with deeper analysis by more people. I request readers either confirm or deny each numbered item below with or without comment. To make it easier, I’m only posting three at a time.

Just reply to this article and identify each item by its number and indicate true/false. Accept each default as true to begin with. I will rewrite or delete as results of your analyses justify it.

True means that a default item is part of female nature that women inherit at birth. False means that the item is missing completely from your heart or something you learned during life. If you learned an item during your life, try as best you can to determine if you actually learned it or just confirmed what already existed in your heart. [If learned or foreign to you, label the item False.]

  1. I have the strength to do the right thing and live up to the expectations of those I have been given the gift of caring for. [from MLaRowe] [Editor: The born-in prime motivator of women is to earn self-importance, which requires from others confirmation of her worth. Consequently, women gain and amplify their importance by doing right things morally and caringly.]
  2. I as a nurse can help others. [from Nancy] [Editor: Witnessing the results of nursing amplifies her sense of self-importance, guides her in doing the right thing, and adds to the gratefulness she feels for herself.]
  3. I have a nice and more attractive body hiding inside me that I can bring into the light of my world. I’m especially grateful that I intend to restore it and expect to have it shortly. [Editor: She always expects to make herself more attractive, but guilt easily triggers dissatisfaction when her appearance goes untended. Yearning for near-perfection, she’s seldom satisfied except momentarily. Striving to attract men, feedback enables her to manage her appearance successfully. (However, her nature doesn't guide her on this momentous fact of life. It’s not body shape that attracts men; it’s how whatever her shape is cared for and presented.)]

Example for responses: “6-T (comments if given)” works okay to reflect your opinion of true to that one item.

Thank you for your opinions.

 

10 Comments

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