What Women Never Hear

1519. Friendly Reminders — #9

A.GuyMaligned — Fri, 27 Jan 2012 12:10:29 +0000

Hardtoget stimulates a man’s imagination, persistence, and determination, which are more powerful than sex appeal. Most women have sex appeal, but too few stimulate a man’s imagination and persistence much beyond sex.
Women accept, encourage, and even duplicate female-unfriendly masculine behavior. Except for genitalia and sexual promise, they appear as just one of the guys. So, men conquer and move on. Women weep and long for Maalox relief from relationship reflux.
Until they yield or unless they fail, women dominate relationships before conquest. Men move cautiously, even ease off their dominance, in order to avoid a no-score.
Male bashing in emails, koffeeklatches, and entertainment media imply or accuse men of domestic irresponsibility. The self-fulfilling prophecy works, and modern women face men they don’t care much about—promise-breaking boyfriends, lackluster husbands, irresponsible fathers, other women’s castoffs, and violent spouses.
Modern wives reject castle-building for their man. They enshrine themselves with him as prince consort to her as sovereign queen. Only wusses, feminized men, and PC advocates stay long with such women.
Men enjoy the proliferation of unobligated sex brought to them courtesy of Feminism. Still, they prefer to marry a sexually inactive woman and the closer to virginity she appears, all the better.

1518. Favored Quotes—Collection 31

A.GuyMaligned — Thu, 26 Jan 2012 13:56:32 +0000

“Many times men don’t know what they want. They need to be in charge but want to please. It’s their nature!” [Anon… at 577]

“I AM a better person for choosing to love him and for submitting to the idea of a great marriage over feeling romanced on a regular basis.” [Ramona at 1461]

“I’ve noticed when there’s an overindulgence of these characteristics, vices appear. For men, it’s pride (with overindulgence of self-admiration) and for women, it’s vanity, envy, or gossip, or a combination of any of these (with overindulgence of self-importance). As a woman, it’s easier for me to identify what I often see with women. By providing men with admiration, and women with importance, both sexes can interact harmoniously.” [Laceagate at 1460]

“Then a few hours later, [my mother] said to me when we were alone: That boy is not afraid of me. If he really loved you, he should be a little afraid of me.” Joanna at 1464]

“I love what one writer has said (in contrast to the 1960′s, “I am woman. Hear me roar.”). She says “As women, we have the power of the whisper.” [Sharon at 1512] [NOTE: Lady Day said the first quote came out in 1973.]

“Many, many women — perhaps out of their woundedness — advocate manipulation (instead of indirectness), aloofness (instead of principled feistiness), superiority (instead of respect), etc. The differences might sound minor, but my experience has been that they instead are a gulf… and one avenue leads women to crustiness and increased discontent, whereas the other leads them to gentleness and increased peace.” [Not-so-annomymous Anne at 1409]

“Men are no longer content to be gentlemen and protect women; they feel the need to conquer incessantly and brag to their buddies. It’s no wonder you are all single and miserable and hate women. In your minds we have become the enemy – you make us adversaries instead of allies.” [Lauren about Guy Jr. at 1495]

1517. Friendly Reminders — #8

A.GuyMaligned — Wed, 25 Jan 2012 12:48:09 +0000

Well-raised children aspire to become adults; they figuratively can’t wait. They expect to earn enough to pay their fare, and then craft a first class life with a mate. However, if treated as adults in childhood and elevated to first class as children, they aspire to just grow up. As adults they continue to act immaturely, because they learned as kids that that’s good enough.
The longer and more persistently a woman keeps a man interested in her without yielding sex the first time, the more he credits her for chasteness generally (aka closer to virginity). His conquering spirit tells him that other guys were unsuccessful. If he can’t score, then others haven’t and can’t.
The wife is the major nesting partner. The home is her domain. More figurative than literal, the successful wife creates a benevolent faux dictatorship. She builds benevolence by turning kingly requirements into queenly preferences. He takes credit for symbols but she uses faux dictatorship to preserve family values and shape outcomes. He’s front office. She’s back office. He fuels the bus with present-day leadership but she drives it with their future paving the road ahead.
What happens in adolescence governs much of what happens in husbanding. Men learn as teens how to later treat women.

1516. Friendly Reminders — #7

A.GuyMaligned — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 15:44:23 +0000

Often to ease her guilt, a woman talks about her ex, but it reveals her own shortcomings. However, sympathetic and empathetic listeners hear only her side and assuage her guilt and ease her blame. It confirms and reinforces her rightness, but a hex emerges. She senses relief from having to be different the next time, from having to change herself in future relationships. So, she gravitates toward guys much like her ex.
Men don’t love competitors, but yet they find men companionable. It’s different with a competitive wife. A man learns quickly that he can never measure up; she always finds a way to win. She overrides or demeans his decisions in domains he considers his own. Her nature mandates that she be that way, if she can’t or won’t abandon her competitiveness to keep a husband.
A man loves a woman directly for the person she is. Not so much for what she does and says, but his respect for her and the promises she holds to brighten his days. His imagination keeps his heart afire. He’s really very simple when truly in love.
Female love is quite different and complex. A woman loves herself first and loves a man secondarily and indirectly. She qualifies him for what he does and says and for his ability to make her life worthwhile—especially her future. Based on her appreciation of how well he does what she expects, she loves him.
However, a woman’s immaturity disrupts the previous pattern. Simply put, an immature woman doesn’t love herself. This shortage of self-love, usually fallout of inadequate fathering, colors her judgment and governs her behavior against finding a compelling and lasting true live.

1515. Friendly Reminders — #6

A.GuyMaligned — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 12:07:59 +0000

The lure of a conquest stimulates a man’s overstatements and stirs braggadocio about his benefits to a woman. It’s his nature. It should trigger her hard-headedness for not only more but also sustained proof of his assertions, if she hopes to win and keep him.
Women nurture, lead, and coach their stepchildren differently than their own. To let differences show stops or slows family blending and makes both classes of kids poorer as family members. Organizational togetherness and solidarity breed harmony, which husband wants to see and expects wife to provide.
When most girls use virtue and abstinence to dominate social dynamics among peers, as in old school, boys turned down for sex don’t take it personal. Instead, girls are just hardtoget, overly virtuous, or daddy’s girl and respect grows between the sexes. When most girls engage in sex either easily or eventually, as in new school, boys turned down take it personal. They lack what they need to compete with guys, girls are blamed, and disrespect grows between the sexes.
Boyhood consists of little men that need their values shaped so they later help fulfill female hopes and dreams. Thus, girlhood determines what womanhood faces with manhood.

1514. Favored Quotes—Collection 30

A.GuyMaligned — Sun, 22 Jan 2012 13:30:24 +0000

“’Pretty time’ has not stuck with me because I was not doing it for myself but for others and since I did not get the result I was expecting I did not put any more effort into it. Pretty time is self-respect and love for myself above all others, which is the only way it can stick because it comes from within. It’s not a veneer.” [Ettisen at 1143]
“In my opinion, kids should be allowed to be kids and they have to fall sometimes or get hurt to learn how to pick themselves back up.” Brittany at 1380
“No competition in the home, because men win sooner or later if they’re forced into competitive mode with their women. Spouses and partners should be a team and not competitors.” [Miss A at 1386]
“It was when I didn’t take the backseat and let things happen that my relationships fell to pieces. Think about it, when you try to force thing (a man) it never turns out the way you want.” [KP at 1434]
“[E]very Mr. Romantic … used romance to dull my attention to his short-comings as a potential forever husband and father.” [Ramona at 1461]
“I’m not big on hyphenated names. To me it looks faux-aristocratic. ” [Ginger at 577] Guy adds: and faux-European.
“Nothing is more important than the breakdown of the family. As it goes, so goes the nation.” [Beauregardtheman aka Stephanie at 1376]

1513. Denise Confirms It’s All About Respect

A.GuyMaligned — Sat, 21 Jan 2012 13:28:18 +0000

Her Highness Denise posted the following comment at 1216—Respect for Women Before Feminism.

Dear Guy,

I was so touched by this post. I know it was not meant to be sentimental, and I didn’t take it as such; but this was the best picture of classic American society, ideals and values that I have ever read–through high school, college, and law school.

I’m having difficulty knowing how to describe what exactly moved me–maybe it was finally reading a credible account of what exactly helped this society to become what it is…and hopefully will continue to be. Perhaps it is that the educational institutions of this country tend to be very cynical, and this post shows that cynicism to be false. They say that the more formally educated a person becomes, the more they tend to lean left. I can’t argue with that statistic, but speaking from what I have seen and experienced, it may have a lot to do with the picture of this country that is often presented: hateful, racist, sexist, oppressive, violent. And the more that picture is thrown in one’s face, the more one believes it must have been true. After all, very few of us were actually there to be able to know how it really was.

It’s like having to make a judgment about America without knowing what actually happened. The conservatives make their arguments that it was one way, the liberals their arguments that it was another. Most on both sides come across as too ideologically driven to be trustworthy. But this concept of respect is compelling as a lens through which to view the social dynamic of yesterday’s American culture.

My great aunt was an African American woman who was a nanny and housekeeper for a wealthy family for years, who made her enter through the back door, cook their holiday meals without regard for her time with family, and paid her a pittance. Her story could be analyzed through either a feminist or racial lens with respect to her limited opportunities. And yet she carried herself with such class and was revered by myself and other family members as being worthy of the utmost respect. When she was alive I often wondered how it could be that those who are now considered to have been the most oppressed and victimized carried themselves with more dignity and self-respect than those who now have more liberty. That itself ought to be the indication that something has gone awry.

I have two women friends who graduated from college in the early 1960s. They told me about how utterly different things were then and all the rules girls were subjected to (to which the young men were not). But neither complained. One said that while she appreciates the greater opportunities for women now, she felt that women were more protected then. Neither claimed that things were perfect, but something needn’t be perfect to be “better”.

It seems that, on the whole, man, woman, black or white (child, chicken or duck…), everyone had a degree of self-respect and an understanding of the necessity of treating others with respect that we simply do not have today. I see that respect is key, and yet I don’t quite understand where it went. What exactly led to people disrespecting themselves and one another?

Denise

P.S. Sorry for the dissertation! I was very encouraged by reading this. It provides a clear picture for me of what to pray for regarding our country. And moreover, it has revived my former political sensibilities, long wilted under the heat of politically correct liberalism.

1512. Friendly Reminders — #5

A.GuyMaligned — Fri, 20 Jan 2012 15:09:00 +0000

Lazy lovers arise from easy conquests. A long courtship and virtual virginity provide time together to gently express needs and expectations, to form intimate habits without sex and with only foreplay to interfere. This doesn’t mean he will become an ideal lover, but he will likely become better than ‘thank you, ma’m’.
Whether you’re rejecting a man or splitting up, do it gracefully. Graciousness makes you different, feminine, and respectable. It confirms your independence and strength of character and generates respect and curiosity about you that stimulates imagination in other men.
You can make your man more attentive, considerate, and perhaps devoted if you validate small things that he does around you, the home, the kids, and in public. However, words are the least effective way to validate manly behavior. Your deeds, non-verbals, and body language convey thoughts more effectively. Quite the opposite of women, he doesn’t like to be told even about simple duties and good deeds but to figure things out.
Females learn about males by withholding sex. Nothing else teaches so well. As a man tries ever more conscientiously and deliberately to conquer a woman, she can spotlight his character, willingness to please her, and ability to fulfill her hopes and dreams. She learns to judge men as candidates for Mr. Right, Wrong, or GoodEnough.

1511. Friendly Reminders — #4

A.GuyMaligned — Thu, 19 Jan 2012 13:20:30 +0000

Women convince themselves that men are after only one thing, so they play along to get along. With each new generation every six or seven years, the male-dominated pop culture becomes more sophisticated at prioritizing sex over the females’ importance to men; unconditional respect for the opposite sex doesn’t form. Men and boys become ever more disrespectful and disdainful in their treatment of females. Were men after only one thing, they would never get involved helping one woman fulfill her hopes and dreams.
A woman makes progress when she makes a man win his way into her events, inner circle, life, and especially inner self. What she easily gives up can discourage his full interest, appreciation, and respect.
Full disclosure removes mystery, the kind that invites curiosity and holds interest. Too much knowledge means less curiosity, which means less interest, which generates less investment time, which means less intense involvement, which generates fewer opportunities to develop his devotion to her, which results in a relationship shortened by the exchange of too much personal knowledge.
Movies and TV send male-friendly messages to the contrary, but a female should never, never, never initiate hook up or instigate link up, shack up, knock up, or marry up. Unless the guy initiates and earns her presence and what she provides, the value of whatever follows drops off—including her value to him.

1510. Friendly Reminders — #3

A.GuyMaligned — Wed, 18 Jan 2012 13:21:39 +0000

She needs his love, but he does not absolutely need hers. Nice to have but he predominantly expects her respect and grateful support for his efforts protecting and providing for her and their children. He primarily expects rewards for both husbanding and fathering, and her love alone doesn’t seal the deal.
Men respect hardtoget, whether encountering it actually or perceiving it innocently as friend or acquaintance. They won’t admit it, but when men think of her side of life, they marvel at such admirable resistance and the respectable challenge she represents. Hardtoget may discourage men that are strictly after sex instead of her, but women should want that.
Modern women and girls ignore old school wisdom. They don’t collectively present themselves wrapped in a self-image presentation of ‘female majesty’ that elevates their role and stature in the lives of men. They don’t culturally adopt a persona that confuses boys and men, teaches female-friendly habits, and sets each male on the right path to pursue and make himself worthy of a woman. Instead, females act desperate to have a boyfriend, try compulsively to keep one, negotiate sex easily, and dress unattractively as if to display their apparent independence of men. They come across subliminally to men and boys as very unimpressive, which means that sex becomes the females’ most prominent bargaining chip. Consequently, men and boys develop few female-friendly habits and skills; they learn to rely on stubbornness of male dominance to overcome female resistance. New school females have it backward; independence should come first and desperation should never show up.

1509. Friendly Reminders — #2

A.GuyMaligned — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 14:09:35 +0000

If she refuses unmarried sex, she may be dumped. But he goes away without conquest and with deflated ego. She effectively sends him packing. Her ego remains mostly undisturbed, although self-esteem might take a brief nose dive. If she yields, she may still be dumped. However, he departs with definitely inflated ego and conqueror’s pride.
She’s the relationship expert, but trouble brews when she accuses her man of taking her for granted. He becomes defensive, because he takes it personal and competitively and her message doesn’t resonate or even register. Moreover, her accusations suppress both objectivity and cooperation.
The male ego feeds on accomplishments but not those that come easily. Unearned gifts, for example, make no lasting impressions. She only makes erasable impressions, when she pushes herself toward him or provides sex with little investment of the heart by him. In that way, she makes herself potentially disposable long before time together can generate a lasting relationship.
I quote Miss Terri, a lady that commented on post 376 some 38 months ago. Has anything changed for the better? “Sadly, I have been the witness of the break-up and close to breaking up of numerous marriages. What I am seeing is men married to women who refuse to be wives. I call them non-wives. There is no intimacy, no loving meals prepared, no support for the husband’ goals, vision, and dreams, constant arguing over every request made, no co-operation with their men. Do men in this position really have wives?”

1508. Friendly Reminders — #1

A.GuyMaligned — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 12:20:02 +0000

A woman disrespects or criticizes her man in front of others. He resents with silence and responds by shutting down. He’s not good company for a while, and it should warn her. He’s stewing about it and similar offenses that pile up to haunt him. She loses points. Enough points lost and she loses her license to appear with him, so he starts doing things alone—hobby, business, guy things.
Men respect women most when females are different than men, especially feminine, mysterious, and not easy to understand. When most females appear that way, men learn to respect the opposite sex unconditionally. A man’s unconditional respect for the opposite sex softens his heart, lowers his aggressiveness, tames his violence, and helps harness his strength and willingness on behalf of women.
Females are the natural experts. However, relationships often sour and even disintegrate from an array of problems, such as incompatibility, separation, divorce, parenting wives, abandonment, deadbeat dads, ungrateful wives, cheating spouses, single motherhood, women imitating men, irresponsible fathers, husband theft, trophy wives, unfaithfulness, moral relativism, porn popularity, promiscuity, unmarried sex, casual sex, friends with benefits, school bus fellatio, prepubescent sluts, dateless college girls, booty calls, virginity devalued, virgins mocked. All can be traced back a half-century to the feminazis,* and their radical, political, and culture-changing values and ideas that contradict both the male and female nature. (*Rush Limbaugh’s term for a dozen or so early, revolutionary, man-hating feminists.)

1507. Avoid Acrimony to Promote Matrimony — Part III

A.GuyMaligned — Sun, 15 Jan 2012 13:39:33 +0000

Every step women take away from feminine attractiveness or toward manliness forfeits more of their relationship expertise and ability to influence men after conquest and a man for lifetime marriage.
Healthy marital habits form during courtship. For example, repeat refusals for unmarried sex bring out a man’s charm and displays of affection as he tries harder to conquer her. Over time, he learns to show attention and shower affection, and the habit forms. Each woman expects much affection in the years to come, but Mr. GoodEnough learns to show it by her being the chaste teacher before they marry.
Men naturally crown their natural aggression and dominance with violence when they think they need it, unless females tame, civilize, and domesticate them. It starts with nurturing mothers and admirable sisters, depends greatly on adolescent girls, and finalizes under the tutelage of a good wife. (Women as lovers and live-ins contribute little, because their potential to be dumped significantly reduces their influence.)
Nagging and criticism alienate rather than teach men to lather affection on their woman.
Not in the pathological but the sociological sense, many women act manic-depressive seeking a man and obsessive-compulsive trying to live with one.
People don’t improve when told of their faults. They improve to meet the expectations of those they like, admire, and respect—those who cite their strengths and reliability. Husbands are people and wives like, admire, and respect them or else they don’t improve.
Strong-willed feminine mystique, female modesty, and moral imperatives focus a man on a woman’s uniqueness, her gender independence, the moral floor for his behavior, and the ceiling of her expectations.
Women think and act like men. The more they do it, the less men honor the female gender as unique and praiseworthy for much more than sex and bending to masculine will.
Unlike men, women like to change whomever they find as inadequate. They often parent husbands as if they are boys.
Parents civilize and domesticate boys. Girls tame boys’ hormonal explosion by withholding sex. Wives motivate husbands to excel at husbanding and fathering. If not, marital relationships suffer.

1506. Avoid Acrimony to Promote Matrimony — Part II

A.GuyMaligned — Sat, 14 Jan 2012 13:24:20 +0000

Women can best tolerate a man’s dominance, keep him, and restrain his promiscuous urges by working from the only playbook that puts women directly in charge of both social and domestic arenas—No Sex without Marriage.
The more diligently that females show respect and gratitude for males generally, the more likely each woman shows respect and gratefulness for her man.
The aggressive male nature requires taming. Mothers nurture boys into adolescents that respect women. Chaste girls civilize boys into men that expect to honor the dreams of women. Wives energize husbands to respect family, responsibilities, and relationships.
Wives’ number one complaint is that their husband does not show enough affection. Showing affection is unnatural for men. They have to be taught and best done in childhood.
When words are enough to conquer, men will offer little else.
Women either set and exemplify civilizing and domesticating values in all their relationships, or men impose masculine hubris on female sensibilities.
Feminism sours male devotion for one female, weakens family responsibility, and curdles masculine incentives for honoring female dreams.
Feminists begrudge the male ego, but the process devalues females in male eyes more than it hurts men in female eyes.
Feminists change the culture by imposing political objectives outside the home, e.g., political correctness. Men take it personal and home life withers as wives are subliminally blamed. (Men angry at women generally don’t make very good mates.)
Feminists ridicule and devalue virginity. This dampens manly ego-stroking, belittles the masculine sense of conquest, and reduces the worth of females generally.

1505. Avoid Acrimony to Promote Matrimony — Part I

A.GuyMaligned — Fri, 13 Jan 2012 15:11:28 +0000

As single women take up, permit, and enjoy sex for its own sake, men bypass learning and respecting other things of importance to females.
In our world today where sex comes before marriage, men look at attractive women as sex targets until conquered and as keeper, backup, duty slut, or throw-away after conquest.
The more that women provide unmarried sex, the easier for each individual woman to miss out as a keeper.
Men need no lessons for ‘wham, bam, thank you, mam’. It comes quite natural. Only women can defeat the urge.
Men learn how to treat a woman differently by rejection for sex by her and others before her. Thus, men learn to respect greatly the female gender.
Morality serves women, but men don’t need it. Mothers and other females carry the burden to see to it that boys and men live within the moral expectations of women.
Mothers civilize and domesticate boys. Chaste girls tame and teach testosterone terrors to honor female dreams. Grateful wives finish the process of making great husbands. Or else men disappoint the female gender.
The more that women trash-talk masculine characteristics, the less men honor female sensibilities.
The female nature strives to live up to something bigger such as God, their man, their children. Men have to learn to live that way, which puts teaching in the hands of women.
The less respect that women show the male gender, the more men become irresponsible for helping fulfill female dreams for home and family.

1504. Ties That Bind and Blind — #18

A.GuyMaligned — Thu, 12 Jan 2012 13:25:30 +0000

The bible praises givers and scorns takers. Givers give, because they are grateful. Takers take, because their self-centeredness overwhelms any gratitude they might have. Since happiness flows from gratitude, takers-only breed their own unhappiness. As the relationship expert in the home, women sense how to bridge the gaps between bad and good, taking and giving, ingratitude and gratefulness, and consequently unhappiness and happiness.
Some women enhance their ego at the expense of their man; they persist on having their own way. They are takers, which works contrary to the female nature. Other women enhance their ego at their own expense in the form of support and respect. They are givers, which complements the female nature and compliments the male nature.
Women competing in the home with their man conflict with Nature. Were it not so, families with one boss, one CEO, one head, one final authority would not be more successful than those with split responsibility for leadership. One final authority always triumphs. Equally shared responsibility for leadership eventually deteriorates to endless and mutual finger pointing, and this leads to separation or living separate lives under the same roof.
Women want to be cherished, but it starts with chastity in girlhood. Not that chastity is required, virtual virginity can enable girls and women to recover. The lessons a girl learns refusing sex to boys teaches her how to become a treasure for men—the first step to cherishment by one. It’s not what she is so much, as that one man perceives her to be exceptional.

1503. RANDOM THOUGHTS—Group 50

A.GuyMaligned — Wed, 11 Jan 2012 15:06:40 +0000

Anger in the heart manifests as ugly in the face. Men have a huge advantage. Surface-only anger gives women a huge advantage.
Guilt and self-criticism or -condemnation are heavy loads to live with after wrongful acts of commission but are much lighter after wrongful acts of omission. Consequently, people avoid risky decisions more easily than doing nothing—even though doing nothing is definitely a decision.
Female friends focus and chatter about consensus and agreement and the process inevitably impugns men behind their backs. The nature of such koffeeklatch exchanges thus becomes anti-male; it inevitably sours wifely attitudes in the home.
Men don’t need breasts for arousal but use them as invitation. Women don’t need big breasts except to lure men; females think men ‘need’ them. Some men do prefer big breasts as offering prospects for fun in sight and bed. Other men appreciate smaller ones as more subtle and merely part of the whole woman.
Cheap dates are a good way to test her sincerity and belief in him. By not offering alibis, he confirms his dominant role.
One’s conscience doesn’t work unless their beliefs include heart-felt values and standards that guide them. Weak or lack of values makes the conscience non-functional. Load the heart with ideology and decisions are political and relative to the morals of those involved. Load it with humanism and decisions are relative to morals defined by Man. Load the heart with self-centeredness and narcissism follows. Load it with Jesus and decisions follow moral principles that originate higher than Man, which induces believers to live up to someone bigger than themselves.

1502. Women Are Sheeple Too

A.GuyMaligned — Tue, 10 Jan 2012 17:03:48 +0000

“Every guy thinks every girl’s dream is to find a perfect guy. Psssh, every girl’s dream is to eat without getting fat.”* It’s just another way women abandon their natural propensity to lead men in exchange for present-day comfort and ease that pushes them toward the land of sheeple.

It’s all relative. As we strive and reach for comfort, we give up ambition. As we achieve comfort and strive for more, the less productive we become as people, individuals, and consequently society and culture. American women are endowed as cultural leaders. As people, however, they enable elitists to provide comfort and We the People transform ourselves into We the Sheeple.

The transformation happens this way. Shy of education about American traditions, we don’t understand the vitality and worth of these unique female-friendly and female-empowering institutions: Declaration of Independence, Constitution of the U.S., Christian aka Western morality, our unique Judeo-Christian culture, and free market capitalism. Inter-connected and interdependent, those institutions provide and promote the Rule of Law that provides and promotes government of, by, and for the people (aka female friendly and feminine led). Weakened, ridiculed, or ignored, those institutions enable the Rule of Man that provides government of, by, and for a self-empowered elite dominated by masculine leadership.

Americans become Sheeple when they tolerate elitists weakening and tearing down the institutions that enable We the People to rule their government. Sheeple are simply unable to generate freedom for good people, discourage bad people, and prevent evil people from gaining control over the rest of us.

Goodness is the absence of evil, which makes ‘bad’ a tolerable component of goodness. If we ever learn to forgive and forget the bad in people including ourselves, we can fight evil. Until we do that, evil tends to spread.

Don’t forget: Women force men to prevent and fight evil, otherwise it doesn’t happen. So, women must lead the way by first forgiving their imperfections.

*Apparent source is ‘typelikeagirl.tumblr.com.

1501. WWNH: Real World — Part 16: Mr. GoodEnough Speaks

A.GuyMaligned — Mon, 09 Jan 2012 11:59:17 +0000

As Lauren and I close out this series, much of the sentiment among the WWNH faithful regarding our story appears to be that of disappointment. That is precisely as I expected, before I (and later, we) embarked. I had little doubt about it.

My main motivation for this series was out of consideration for my father, Sir Guy. Lauren was gracious enough to step out from behind her very private walls and contribute as well, and I cannot thank her enough. After 1500 days with only 30-35 days away from daily posting, and frankly being both mentally and physically taxed because of health issues with my mother, I felt like my 80 year-old father could use a break for the holidays.

I knew that our story invoked many principles Sir Guy has written about in his labor of love called WWNH. After all, I was on the “taming” end of Lauren’s formidable skills, reinforced by this blog. I also knew that parts of our journey would be perceived by many to fly in the face of WWNH. Because of that, many of your comments are quite predictable.

People will always have their opinions – we made it public, after all. I appreciate every single one of them because they stimulate the thoughts and dialogue that were created and fostered here.

Taking nothing away from my father and his supporters, life doesn’t always follow the roadmap laid out in WWNH. That’s why I called this series “Real World.”

This has been “our” journey, for better or for worse, as they say. In this case, it has been only for the better for me as a man and suitable companion as Lauren shaped me into her Mr. GoodEnough. I was brutally honest about some of my abhorrent and unacceptable behaviors (not the most fun things to relive) for one reason. WWNH techniques and principles in the real world, not just theoretically on a blog, can create big changes in your life and the lives of others.

As one might expect, there are thousands of details about our journey that we could never document here. At times I had to lace up my boots and go to work accepting my shortcomings and changing my thoughts and behaviors. But there were other times where I was able to slip on my flip-flops and stroll along the beaches of bliss, hand-in-hand with Lauren.

I wanted to share the most challenging, yes, even offensive details, to illustrate not only what truly happens in the real world on a daily basis, but also what can be done (such as in Post 1500) when you find those kinds of events in your real world.

Finally, I would like to thank each of you for allowing us to borrow your space here at WWNH for a short time and provide Guy Sr. with a well-deserved break. Happy New Year and best wishes for you and yours in 2012.

Oh. One more thing. I hope the Mayans are wrong about that whole end-of-the world thing in 2012. Lauren and I are having way too much fun to see it end that soon!

Guy Jr.

1500 — WWNH: Real World — Part 15: Mr. GoodEnough Emerges

A.GuyMaligned — Sun, 08 Jan 2012 14:52:35 +0000

It is now easy to see that our journey has not been without its pitfalls and the fact that we are writing about it shows that we managed to overcome those challenges in a way that was productive. So, now you are asking, “How was it done?” Very simply in my mind: With a positive, quiet and forgiving manner – those very things WWNH talks about daily – feminine grace. Well, that and basic behavior modification principles, which I was fortunate enough to practice during my career in mental health.

In the beginning I was very clear about what I wanted in a man – never saying, “This is what I want you to do.” Rather I would say, “I need security, protection, and someone who is willing to let me nurture.” I spoke of my needs in “a man” not “this man.”
I continually reinforced the things of which I wanted to see more. For example: “I like the gentle side of you; I like how safe I feel when you put your arm around me; You are so sweet to call me each morning – I love hearing your voice first thing in the morning.”
There were very few, if any, negatively framed responses from me. Even when Guy Jr.’s behavior was hurtful and disrespectful, I was careful to not trample his self-esteem nor attack his maleness. I made it clear that I did not like and would not interact with him if those undesirable behaviors continued; I did not want to change the man – just the behavior. To me this is an important concept – being able to separate the man from the undesirable behavior I did not like.
I held firm on my expectations and over time he met them. I never forced the “relationship” or asked him to give up anything for me. By holding firm it became clear to him that if he wanted to be a part of my life, he would have to meet those expectations.
While he was recognizing, learning, and responding to my needs and expectations – I too, had to learn to recognize these things about him – and I’m not talking about sex. Other than the things such as modesty and femininity that WWNH discusses, Guy Jr. needed me to be more open in my communications and he wanted me to step outside my comfort zone and take some fun risks with him (such as riding with him on a motorcycle.) The more trust he earned by meeting my needs/expectations, the more I was able to relax and meet his needs. He recognized early that by providing me with security (physical, emotional, etc.) he would get what he wanted from more open communication, emotional closeness, etc. That doesn’t mean there weren’t bumps in the road and a crash or two along the way. It means we learned what was important to each other.
I did not want to change the man in any way. Many women go into the relationships thinking they can change a man and end up disappointed. I started with a quality man who had some rough edges that had been shaped by today’s feminist culture of free and loose with no expectations or responsibilities. I wanted to soften and smooth out those rough and sharp edges to make him more pleasing to me.
And the most important point – he was ready. How did I know this? His willingness to respond to my expectations. His desire to change his behaviors to meet my needs, which I neither forced nor demanded.

In closing, I’d like to say that because of my very private nature, I was apprehensive about sharing our story and opening ourselves up to criticism and judgment. While some have judged and others been supportive – and while not perfect – it is our story, our process of becoming a very solid and happy couple. The actual exercise of writing this series with Guy Jr. and the ensuing discussions and analysis of our respective behaviors has fostered better communication and brought us closer than anything else we have ever done together. So for that reason alone, I am grateful we shared our experiences in this public forum.

My final thought is this: The “perfect” man for you is not going to show up on your doorstep, ready-made. You will have to shape and mold him in ways that are not offensive and the process will not be without its tough moments. Starting with a good man, one with good values, morals, character, and integrity can become the perfect man for you if you remain true to yourself and your beliefs.

Guy Jr. will close out our story tomorrow with his final thoughts.