Dear Daughter, no doubt you’ve considered and maybe argued the merits and demerits of teen chastity and abstinence. Did you consider the following?
What happens in adolescence governs much of what happens in husbanding. Men learn as teens how to later treat women.
· Female abstinence and virtue generate conditional respect for individual girls, while chastity among other girls earns unconditional respect for their gender. Both kinds of respect are essential for enduring love and permanent husbanding to arise as motivators among men.
· Actions speak loudest to boys. By successfully resisting the mutual urge to merge, girls confirm their own virtue and breathe it into boys’ minds.
· Virtue more than sex makes a female more personally and permanently appealing. (Morality serves females more than males. Moral standards build virtue and reinforce female strengths so useful in restraining male dominance.)
· Girls train boys to be men this way: Teen virtue and abstinence holds in check both the male and female urge to merge. For both boys and girls, deferred gratitude teaches desirable habits that condition minds over hormones, thoughts over feelings, and Us before Self.
Boyhood consists of little men that need their values shaped so they later help fulfill female hopes and dreams. Thus, Girlhood determines what Womanhood faces with Manhood.
PS. One last but critical thought: When Girlhood rules itself with virtue and abstinence, boys turned down don’t take it personal. “She’s all hung up”. When Girlhood provides sex easily, boys turned down take it personal. He must be lacking, since she yields to other boys. He’s indirectly told that he’s insignificant or worse. His self-esteem takes a temporary hit, but self-image takes a permanent hit: He can’t compete with other guys. Forced to face his shortcomings so dramatically causes bitterness and self-hatred that too easily leads to violence later if not sooner. See post 337. Unsafe at Any Speed for more detail on this point.