Tag Archives: virtual virginity

1971. Compatibility Axioms #381-390


381. People highly value the unavailable or unattainable. The ultimate result of male pursuing female boils down to one question. What’s her ‘price’ to be sexually available to him? The higher her price, the greater her perceived value, and the greater his effort must be to discover her price, earn her acceptance, and decide whether or not to pay it. (It’s a major reason her sexual history should be none of anyone else’s business.) [136]

382. Repeated refusals for first-time sex together make her appear unattainable. Relative, of course, to how determined she defends herself. Each refusal escalates her value, keeps him guessing, and pushes him to try harder. If she holds out long enough, her continually rising price makes him consider whether she’s worth her ultimate price—most likely marriage. [136]

383. Men feast with their eyes. The higher her price, the more attractiveness she adds to whatever he already perceives of her. Strengthened desire works much like a few martinis with these exceptions: Attractiveness enhanced by martinis doesn’t last. Attractiveness loses its captivating appeal after conquest. Conquerors view the conquered in a much different light.[136]

384. Expectant conquerors wonder: What’s her price to be sexually accessible to other men? Virtual virginity signals she’s not active. If he can’t penetrate her defenses, other men can’t either. After all, he’s First Stud in his eyes. [136]

385. Before conquest, if she’s unwilling or unable to match wits and wills to hold him off, his dominance will always prevail in their relationship. Before conquest is both her testing and proving ground for what their relationship future looks like. [136]

386. Wives cheat on their husband and expect him to respond as women do. It doesn’t work. When he cheats, she wants to know. When she cheats, he wants to go.  [137]

387. Women should be but don’t seem to be haunted by these questions: Do younger women attract husbands away from their wives? Or do wives lose their ability to hold their man? Or, do wives drive husbands away? Women automatically blame husband or his new attraction. Wives proclaim themselves to be innocent and victimized. Flooding the wife with peer empathy and sympathy, friends and family help restore emotional letdown or breakdown. The rest of the story isn’t explored, because feminists inspired women to not listen to men about man things. (IMHO, this sums it up. Husbands wander away from wives because the wife is no longer the woman they married.) [137]

388. Conquered women lack the allure of attractive unconquered ones. She may be a good lay or good wife or both, but the attractive and unconquered still attract men. To hold a man’s devotion, a woman must compensate for his giving up his independence, reward him for husbanding and fathering. Instead, modern women view as unfair this inequality of Nature. Thus, they ignore, demean, or lose focus on their natural abilities to capture and hold onto one man. [137]

389. Successful marriage requires relationship management. Women qualify as experts, but men don’t. Men are too easily seen as culprit, plus they lack the soft relationship skills to restore marital peace. It’s much simpler and easier for husbands to let masculinity steer them away from one woman. Consequently, it takes an expert’s best efforts to overcome his hormonal urges. Once again, life ain’t fair, but women want a permanent mate more than the reverse. [137]

390. The female gender has made itself politically, morally, and socially entitled to masculine-style sexual freedom. It’s a major cause of so much trouble trying to keep a man’s devotion. When many women act sexually unattached, wives too easily become suspect in the eyes of their husband. He knows what other men are after. Can he remain positive that she’s different from other women? Consequently, casual sexual practices within the sisterhood poison faithful marriages. [137]

 

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1948. Compatibility Axioms #301-310


301. Virtual virginity means keeping her legs crossed before marriage. It puts her in the buyer’s seat and forces a man to be the seller, to make himself worthy of her instead of the other way around. (Men don’t truly appreciate what they don’t earn.) [125]
302. Her attractiveness spikes his interest for sex. It’s up to her to convert that interest over to her. Heeding granny’s advice to keep a dime between her knees works best. [125]
303. Her first refusal for sex spreads a man’s interest to try harder, to know her better. Subsequent refusals push him to look ever deeper for weaknesses he can exploit to convince her to yield. (Presuming he accepts her refusals as other than rejections of him.) [125]
304. As her refusals continue in courtship, he serendipitously discovers her admirable strengths and non-sexual qualities. These earn more respect both for her potential as a keeper and promise for mating. (Provided, of course, he’s more interested in her than just conqueror’s sex.) [125]
305. By yielding sex before marriage, she reverses their natural roles. She becomes seller to his buyer, and he’s paid her price when she yields. It’s too late for her to raise the ante; the door closes partly or fully on his investing more in her even though the potential for it resides in the male nature. [125]
306. As the seller, she settles for less than she deserves because she has only one conquest event with each man. (Women may not see it that way, but men do. Men change after conquest, and it forces women to change to stay abreast of the conqueror.) [125]
307. Conquest is a relationship-changing event for a man. He quits looking so interestedly at a conquered woman. Nature releases his heart to pursue something or somebody else. [125]
308. By yielding unmarried sex, she lets a man know what price she charges for submission. This naturally, automatically, and subconsciously programs his mind on how their relationship will work in the future. It enlarges his expectations for getting his way with her—we’re talking greater male dominance here, aren’t we? [125]
309. The longer and more intensely without sex that he stays focused on her, the greater their bonding and the more promising their future together. [125]
310. Just a friendly touch in passing or a pat on the back sends a message of trust that earns a man’s regard if not respect. If he mistakes her friendliness for something else, she has uniquely subtle ways to turn him off without offense and immense power to discourage with offense. Friendly touching in passing is a small price women pay. It helps hold onto the respect of men other than their own, which magnifies their gratefulness for both men and themselves. [123]

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1945. Men Marry Virtue But What Is That?


A man marries for the promise he sees in a woman, which arises out his liking or loving her unique, persistent, and steadfast virtues. Women show off their best qualities hoping to find masculine confirmation. But the sexes both define and value female qualities differently. So what are virtues?

A man sees a virtue when he admires some quality in a woman. If he doesn’t admire a particular characteristic, it may be good but it’s not virtuous. It holds little or no promise when he’s thinking about a life together. As a result, the male nature impacts women this way; earning his admiration is more important than what women usually rely on to find, capture, marry, and hold a man.

A man admires her less obvious qualities. Surprise, surprise! Neither her sexual assets nor claims and demonstrations of female love are virtuous, however convincing or even sexual they may be. Appreciated, yes, but not virtuous. Both sexual assets and love are common and available from all females. And anyway, a man knows that many women should easily love him and his sexual performance; how can they not with all of his qualities, potential, and promise?

An exception exists. Rejecting a man for sex is virtuous.* His admiration arises when he’s exposed to a woman who claims moral values and sticks to her standards. Virtue appears as he comes to admire these qualities: her resistance as self-respect, rejection as self-dedication, chasteness as success, hope in men as faith in herself, and endless patience as the means of finding a man worthy of her. Admiring her determination and allegiance to brighten her own future, his perception of her promise as potential mate not only grows; it appeals to his nature and challenges him to try harder to win her.**

Consequently, a man doesn’t marry a woman because she loves him; it’s not even necessary as when a man falls in love at first sight. A man marries for the promise a woman holds for brightening the life he expects to live. Also, another surprise for women, virtuous excludes the promises women like to make to improve their chances.

Men judge on actions more than words. They especially admire these female influences in action. Her physical attractiveness taunts him, personality charms him, tenderness calms him, humor delights him, flexibility amazes him, modesty bewilders him, steadfastness strengthens him, patience beguiles him, happiness infects him, smiles please him,  inabilities challenge him, goodness outshines him, generosity shames him, joy lifts him, stifled complaints reassure him, respect exalts him, soft-heartedness impresses him, hard-headedness surprises him, cooking benefits him, housekeeping supports him, gratitude confirms him, dependency energizes him, manners settle him, mystique intrigues him, monogamy inspires him, and devotion disguises his failings. It’s not her qualities that generate her promise but his judgment that certain ones are admirable. It’s not her love or sexual assets that earn his respect; it’s his admiration of her qualities that  he allows to influence him.

After they marry, unfortunately, she too easily perceives that he takes her for granted. As she fulfills the promise he expects, he finds satisfaction in her virtuous behavior. After the honeymoon, his devotion shifts into another form. It’s time to live the life that he expects, and so he displays his devotion by producing, providing, protecting, and problem solving in return for her fulfilling the promise she brought into his endless but rewarding life of work. Being taken for granted, however, means her virtues continue to be highly valued and promise a good life for them together. If not, his dissatisfaction would be obvious, his devotion would be fading, and their mutual disappointment would be increasing.

When she displays herself in such ways and steadfastness that men admire her qualities, her promise as marital candidate grows in some man’s heart. Their natures work in harmony; she attracts men by earning their admiration and one eventually responds with supreme interest. If she continues her virtuous ways after marriage, he sees little or no reason to look for promise elsewhere. Why go through that again? Perfection is worthy of pursuit in many things but not in finding and keeping a mate.

Mutual admiration works much better to make marriage permanent. The mind and heart can’t disrespect what they admire, and a man’s love is based on respect. Hence, the more virtuous she appears to him, the more she’s respected and loved. It all starts with her virtues as perceived by her man.

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*Explanations are provided in the Virtual Virginity series listed in CONTENTS.

** Nonsexual courting ultimately makes him a better man in her eyes. In the same process, his actions convert his heart from interest to devotion, which develops him into being more worthy of her. They both learn to rise above themselves to favor the other, which ultimately puts ‘us’ above her and her above him.

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1924. Compatibility Axioms #181-190


181. Single women invite temporary relationships when they look for Mr. Right. He shows up after wife motivates husband to achieve her hopes and dreams that were conceived in girlhood and modified by a couple decades of marital adjustments and developments.

182. Unmarried chastity prolonged by a woman—that is, virtual virginity—can turn earlier, shameful, or promiscuous behavior into no one else’s business. [100]

183. Sex only captures a man’s attention. Subtlety, charming mystery, indirect influence, modesty, respectability, friendly sweetness, and dedication to sexual fidelity hold his interest. [100]

184. Her virtue is anything she has or does that a particular man admires, which also means that men generally can’t, won’t, or don’t. A woman appears feminine when she uses her virtues. One woman, Karen, says it neatly when she claims that femininity adds color to a man’s black and white world. [Keys to the Kingdom, Alison A. Armstrong, PAX Programs Inc., p. 151.]

185. When they act more like men, females abandon their natural modesty. They give up character strength to swallow embarrassments caused by men. It reinforces male domination. Suggestion: Females should adopt this as standard textbook: A Return to Modesty by Wendy Shalit. [100]

186. Men get as romantic as a woman requires before she yields to foreplay, intercourse, or both. Girls have the critical role in teaching boys the hows and whys of good romance habits. If girls don’t do it, men won’t have it, and women have to compensate.  [100]

187. The dominance game plays out differently once a couple has intercourse. Sex before marriage affirms and thereby strengthens his dominance. Conquest afterward modifies his dominance by adding respect and empathy for her. [100]

188. When marriage is less than absolutely essential to a woman, her boyfriend is miles ahead of her in avoiding it. [100]

189. The most hopeful investment a single woman can make is to get beyond commitment. Without nurturing or mothering him, she enables and patiently waits for boyfriend to become devoted to her and her ambitions for family and castle building. His devotion may not stop growing after he conquers her, but his nature is such that it’s highly probable. [100]

190. The smart woman on a date wants other men to ignore her, so she can concentrate on her mission, that of sealing or enjoying the relationship with her male companion. Men are not as dedicated. [100]

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1916. Compatibility Axioms #111-120


111.By their nature, women favor equality as primary for decision making. Men favor fairness. Resolve it early or arguments compound and bitterness can’t be far behind.

112. Any promise of his castle dies, when she takes charge after marriage and keeps squeezing him to fit better into her ideals of their home and model of life within it. [54]

113. Submissiveness is a cooperative spirit. Regardless of its name and who possesses it when and where, such a spirit is essential for marriage to work. [56]

114. Phonies lose in the end. During courtship she hides her true character in order to get a man to marry her. Afterward, she reverts to her true self and to him becomes a different woman—one he did not intend to marry. [54]

115. It quickens his departure, when she rejects him as family hero and elevates the kids over him. [54]

116. It subverts a marriage, when she treats his opinions as less important and judgments as less valuable than those of someone else. [54]

117. Each marriage faces three monumental events: the 2-year glitch, 7-year itch, and 20-year switch. Prevention starts years earlier. Avoidance is difficult. Recovery makes the steep slope slicker, but it all toughens mates. [65]

118. Nothing is foolproof, but the virtual virginity strategy works best to remarry an ex. If he’s going to be any different than in their first marriage, he needs to respect her more.  [70]

119. Feminism makes women think more like men, especially ‘me before you’ and ‘me before us’. Such women lose much of their natural expertise for holding a man.[71]

120. A man expects to succeed as himself in all of his relationship roles. He focuses primarily on provider-protector and needs a lot of feminine coaching to fully accept the friend, faithful mate, husband, father, affection-giver, and devoted-lover roles that his woman expects. [72]

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1910. Compatibility Axioms #101-110


101. She marries expecting him to change, but he doesn’t. He marries expecting her not to change, but she does. Both get what they don’t want in the other.[54]

102. Feminist thinking in the home inspires women to find ingratitude for their man’s faults rather than gratefulness for his manliness and strengths as unique from other men. (Incidentally, if she doesn’t bless herself by pumping him up in her eyes, he wilts in her heart.) [47]

103. Virtual virginity enables a woman to uncover what a man is really after—conquest, conquer and dump, frequent or convenient sex, or her above all else.[51]

104. Unfortunately, feminists and political ‘correctioneers’ taught modern men through sexual harassment charges and lawsuits to keep their mouths shut. So, modern women don’t receive the manly compliments they desire and often crave. The less they get, the more they expect, which causes them to act selfishly and turn men off.

105. Regarding household tasks, she treats her man as a domestic employee. That is, all orders, perfect results required, and few decisions left to him. This adds to a sense of insignificance for him around the house. It’s his greatest fear, but escaping the house also escapes her too-tight supervision. [54]

106. Feminist thought causes it. She considers his machismo and the male ego to be ‘crimes against females’. This signals her preference for a wuss and she treats her husband accordingly, whether he is or not. [54]

107. It’s sappy thinking. She expects a man to husband her with no tradeoff for his having given up his freedom. [54]

108. A man’s natural pursuit of other females does not stop until one woman so captures his respect and trust and captivates his imagination until he devotes himself to her alone. (Virtual virginity provides the best strategy for winning this battle of the sexes.) [51]

109. She exhibits poor leadership in the home by telling her man HOW to do things instead of WHAT to do. She wants her nest made more perfect in her eyes, so she uses her standards to deny his imaginative inputs, direct interest, and opportunity to earn self-admiration by doing things his way. [54]

110. Few things cause early stumbling after marriage more than insincerity during courtship, aka phoniness. (I know of three women who unsuspectingly changed to other characters. On her wedding night one became “another person” according to her husband.)

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1902. Compatibility Axioms — #31-40


31. Female independence gained through masculine-style sexual freedom makes marriage dwindle in importance, vitality, longevity, and appeal to men.

32. Feminism brought into the home changes the natural and cooperative battle of the sexes into an unnatural and competitive war of the sexes.

33. The more that wives take feminist theory and dogma into the home, the more that husbands decide the kind of husband or ex they will become. Feminism is foreign and abrasive to the point of incompatibility with male nature.

34. Successful adult relationships depend upon the lessons girls learn while teaching boys to honor feminine values, standards, and expectations. Popularized and rampant teen sexual activity short-circuits the process. It enables men to win and women to lose as relationships fail and male dominance dumps women into the recycle bin.

35. Women expect men to be more romantic, but romance slows a man’s conquering nature. Except when forced by circumstances or desire to honor females with manly spell-binding charm, romance to males means foreplay or prelude to it.

36. Men are not naturally romantic. If not ‘trained’ to habitually romance her before marriage, he won’t do much of it afterwards.

37. Boys first learn romance by watching father affectionately romance mother without sexual implications. Later, they learn from girls who inspire manly romance by withholding foreplay and women withholding sex, which forces guys to find and learn new ways to use charm, persuasion, and romantic stimulation.

38. If a guy won’t cherish her and honor her expectations before conquest, he sure won’t afterwards.

39. Girls can protect their chastity with the same élan, dynamism, dedication, and silence on the subject as if they were still virgin. When left to their imagination, virtual virginity mesmerizes boys as does the real thing. Women have the same choices, since virtual can substitute for real virginity and be used to hold a man’s attention while feminine mystique, female modesty, and standards of morality capture his devotion.

40. Self-development is the primary mission of toddler boys. More independent than girls, boys start and know how to go about it. Unless taught otherwise, they know they 1) are handy, 2) can be better, 3) intend to prove it, and 4) will find ways to demo their “adult-ness.” Development slows or jumps off track, however, under poor or excessive nurturing in toddlerhood and poor or excessive parental leadership between first grade and puberty. Both of those parental shortcomings shift 1, 2, 3, and 4 toward things undesirable for parents.

 

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1898. TO YIELD OR NOT TO YIELD?


In an evolutionary manner, female sexual freedom wipes out male desire for marriage. Each new generation has to be different from the previous; sexual activity marches earlier and broader across girlhood. Thus, feminist-inspired sexual freedom escalates in the blotting out of marriage as the customary way of living together.

Men win with plenty of unmarried sex, by not having to marry to win a woman, and by living without vows to keep their hearts and minds dedicated to one woman. Women win with endless opportunities for sex. Their gender loses the unconditional respect of the male gender. Women lose opportunities to raise children under the legal wrappings of marriage. Women lose more respect of men, because many conquests makes men disrespect the female gender. Women live their lives without anyone caring about their uniqueness as individuals or being subjected to ever-increasing male dominance in the social and domestic arenas.

Feminists ridicule and devalue virginity and promote openness of sexual history in order to boast of female sexual freedom. Such behavior loudly proclaims that women are primarily what men want first, that is, easy to yield. It attacks men by weakening the ego-stroking and self-admiration of hard-fought and hard-won contests of getting a woman into bed. Feminists begrudge the male ego, but the process of proving sexual freedom devalues females for vow-enhanced marriage much more than it hurts men.

After a woman yields, her sex partner is not nearly as interested in finding out just exactly how unique she is from other women. So, her yielding makes him more temporary than aimed at permanence with her. The Marrying Man seeks to marry an unique woman, one that upholds his self-image as deserving of the best available. Her uniqueness accumulates with her other virtues when she protects her sexual assets with self-dedication that can be admired by a man. Her self-defense is more respectable and admirable than her virgin or other status and thus makes her more unique and more attractive as potential wife. He’s more concerned about her future fidelity than past events.

Grannies knew this but feminists taught women not to listen to them or mothers. Yielding sex excites a man for more. However, desire expires when romantic love fades, if not before and perhaps vice versa.

A man’s conquest destroys a female’s greatest asset because it’s her most male-sought feature, namely their first sex together. By not forcing men to accept her sexual restraint, she can’t turn her self-dedication into what men admire most and call virtue. The greater is her resistance to a man’s conquest, the greater he expects her faithfulness to him as boyfriend or husband.

Men marry for the promise they see in a woman and virtues top the list of desirables. By yielding without marriage, she loses her partner’s diligence to discover more about her likeability and other virtues. To every man she yields the first time, she makes herself less worthy of his respect, of less interest for long-range courtship, and less desirable for marriage with him.

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P.S. Two conquerors face off even before the first date. The strategy of virtual virginity, described in two dozen articles listed in the CONTENTS page, strengthens a woman’s determination and reinforces her dedication to conquer him before he conquers her.

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