Sweetheart love, the sweetest, melts into smooth flowing and enduring love, the deepest. But spouses have opposing natures and primal urges that conflict beneath the love they share.
She’s driven to nest, nurture, and nestle with loved ones, and he’s the primary target in the early years.
But further, she expects him to produce, provide, protect, and problem-solve to assist with whatever she needs.
His naturally independent nature responds: He simply does the best he can. His best fades, however, if she fails to fully respect his primary self-interest, next.
He’s driven to make himself significant, to overcome Nature and other barriers, compete with men, succeed in the workplace, and shape human events. It’s his role in life, and progress and accomplishment are their own rewards.
Her naturally grateful heart responds: If he’ll do those things on my behalf, I’ll reward him for husbanding and fathering.
Merging these natural differences compatibly leads to cooperation—good! Failure to recognize and respect these differences leads to competition—ungood!