This post continues with the splendor and dignity of merging mutual rewards into a successful marriage.
I can’t repeat this often enough: Sex does not bond men. However, investing himself bonds a man. Rewards earned keep him invested, because rewards encourage more of the same behavior. Excuses and denials discourage sexual episodes but not the male sex drive.
Pre-marital sex for a couple takes the crown off her marital majesty. It suggests others may have known her, implies she may be bribing him, and reduces reward-ability if they do marry. None may be fatal, but each weakens her holding power for a lifelong marriage.
For sex with her to be a reward, he has to invest himself. A small investment for sex with her may be somewhat rewarding, but does it make him want to live with her forever? A man’s devotion springs from actions, such as investing himself in something—hobby, woman, job? The greater his investment of himself, the greater is his reward.
Husbanding and fathering require rewards to keep a man loyal and dedicated. Rewards imply more to come, which keeps his attentions on the one providing rewards. Sex is not truly a reward unless conquest has been worked for, and subsequent events are encouraged and not reluctantly given.
In the end, the investment of his independence comes from withholding her ultimate asset until he makes the ultimate commitment of marrying her. It sounds so simple, but few relationship accommodations are more difficult.
The majesty, the splendor and dignity of sex? It rises with lifelong devotion and dedication to one another. It feeds off romantic intimacy, if the proper foundation was laid earlier.