Women advertise and chatter to find common values, standards, and expectations for associating. Aim at this target. Get more personal than men desire.
If you don’t interview him, he will interview you. For a temporary relationship, his finding out about you may work best. For the long range, however, your finding out about him serves you best. Examples follow to fill in the blanks in your ad, change the subject while chatting, and erase dead spots during phone talk. (Test him. Make him think about what he can and can’t disclose. The choices he makes tells you a lot.)
- What male character in the movies reflects your character, not your looks now but your character?
- What music stirs your deeply? Not your excitement for living but the depth of your soul? None? Then you’re not familiar with your own soul, your heart, your deepest feelings?
- What was your greatest accomplishment? Were you pushed to do it or do it on your own? What lessons did you learn?
- What do you expect to be doing five years from now? How far or difficult will that be? How realistic is your outlook? Are you doing it alone?
- What’s your favorite book? Last book you read? If you don’t read, where did you get your knowledge?
- What adult(s) shaped your life? What was their greatest contribution? How do you now profit from it?
- Let’s cut to the chase about sharing costs of dates. I don’t measure a man’s worth by how he spends on me. We won’t be swapping our ultimate assets, so you won’t be spending big on me. Dating is for exploration, and heavy spending neither helps nor impresses me, because face-to-face works in any venue.
- Don’t take this as any desire to marry now or soon. I dedicate my money to whatever future some man can provide. I expect men to dedicate their money to the present, to investing in one woman for a future together. If we’re going to play, you have to pay. If I’m not worth it, you’re not good enough.
- I’m vulnerable to the chivalrous actions of a gentleman. Can you bring it?
- I can spell and expect gentlemanliness, and men are never more handsome than when they deliver it.
- If guilt plagues you about not paying a fair share on dates, you have several options to assuage it. For example, you save up some estimated percent of date costs. Never let him know your intentions, but when he gives you an engagement ring, you give him your savings as seed money for your forthcoming marriage. You reward him this side of the altar. (What if he later dumps you? You keep the ring, he keeps the money. All’s fair in love and war when everyone takes risks.)
You gals will easily find all manner of problems using those pointers. Feminism conditioned you to accept masculine self-centeredness as normal. It’s bee-ess as one of my favorite women nails such crap. You’ll never swipe away the phoniness of modern men chasing women for sex without bracing up each one with questions that force exposure of their character. If you don’t measure good enough by character, you proceed down the road toward marital misery.