Cast into life as dependent creatures, women need help. They grow up learning to solicit, trade assets, and lobby for what they need and want. Born hard-headed and soft-hearted, they are tough-minded about children. They avoid having to fight, prefer cooperation to competition, and consequently need a moral code to contain the aggressive nature of men.
The male nature lacks the need of a moral code. Actions spring from the males’ primal drive to compete with Nature, other men, and control human events, which spreads and accumulates into the constantly varying and unpredictable Rule of Man. That’s when women become tools and slaves of men, unless they impose their own moral code as counterbalance. Inspired by God, the Holy Bible provides the greatest code ever developed to provide and protect women and children. (As Rabbi Lapin asks: Would the world be a better place if overnight two billion Muslims became Evangelical Christians?)
Cast into life as independent creatures, men don’t need help except as they earn and solicit it. They are born as hard-headed and hard-hearted competitors. They are tough-minded about protecting their interests, dignity, and significance. When those traits are threatened, they are ready to fight whomever, wherever, whenever, and however. They find their way throughout life by connecting to whatever satisfies their senses of accomplishment, self-admiration, and significance.
Functioning far more independently than women, men migrate toward love of job, hobby, adventure, achievement, and habits that are bad for them and others but that make them feel good. Their nature energizes them to accept political ideologies, exploit masculine competition and female cooperation, confirm self-admiration, and protect their interests and property while enlarging their sense of significance.
The male nature urges them to reject the idea that anyone is greater than they. It inspires resistance to religious beliefs that promote appreciation of humans, generate mutual respect, and endorse love for and devotion to a priceless few. Consequently, women face this result: Men tend to avoid or reject whatever requires self-restraint. A couple’s first battle of the sexes thus begins at the margin of the woman’s morality; at the point the man begins to comprehend and either accepts or rejects her moral standards, expectations, and determination to live up to a code sourced higher than both him and her. Without her possessing those traits, their relationship revolves around his hard-headed and hard-hearted intentions, and their relationship equation begins out of balance in his favor.
Men are impressed much more by a woman’s actions than her words and promises. When she routinely grooms and dresses neat, pretty, and stylish as opposed to sloppy, exotic, or erotic, men read her as hard to weaken or break down for conquest. She obviously has high standards about life since she has them for her appearance. She appears to like and respect herself, seeks to avoid being messed up or worse, wants always to be seen at her best, and is prepared to live life the same way. Such grooming and dressing actions signify to men that she has oodles of self-respect, which in itself initiates a man’s respect (out of which a man’s love arises). By appearing particularly organized and dominant about herself, she exhibits the first sign of a strong moral code up to which she expects men to follow her lead. She may need help in life, but she wants it her way more than she want it now.
Ralph Waldo Emerson said the world turns on hope. I translate hope as the driving force given birth not by words and promises but by subtleness, indirectness, and non-verbal communication seen in actions. Such as that generated by a well-groomed and -dressed lady who is inspired by and honors a moral order higher than herself. Such women present themselves to the world as much less easily conquered, which subtly, indirectly, and non-verbally challenges men to want her for more than just sex—and in the case of husbands to want her for life.
It’s the first battle of the sexes, and their future turns brighter when women bring men into their system of morality. It all begins when she grooms and dresses in the morning, which takes us back to ‘pretty time’.