2004. RANDOM THOUGHTS—Group 92


  • When you’re about to be raped by a date, accuracy and truthfulness don’t matter. Slow your defense long enough to say, “Your mother said you would NEVER do this. Does your mother always call you by the name she used with me? Or does she lie?” And just keep talking about his mother while defending yourself physically. (If it slows or stops him, it’s the surprise of you possibly having talked to his mother about him. Threatening to later tell his mother won’t have a similar wilting effect.)
  • If a man is going to devote himself to a woman, he wants to know what men preceded him sexually in her life. Several reasons prompt his curiosity, and several outcomes hinge on the revelations. It’s not the ‘used’ and unused issue. That’s how he hides his agenda. It’s those other guys. When? How recent? Who? Do I know them? Will I meet them? Were they better in bed with her? Will they return to her or vice versa? Who will she compare me with? How faithful was she to them? Were my family or friends involved? Will she turn back to them? What emotional attachments and physical attractions remain? (Incidentally, a man’s respect declines for a woman conquered by someone for whom he lacks respect.) [121]
  • Equality isn’t truly attainable and interferes with compatibility this way. Inequities remain in the minds of those who lose decisions that are supposedly rendered on the basis of equality. On the other hand, fairness promotes compatibility. It resolves issues by generating decisions at least acceptable to both sides. If not always agreeable, the ‘losing side’ doesn’t feel compelled to search for new arguments. Fairness aims for common-sense and vice versa. (Revolutionaries, political activists, and radical feminists use the females’ natural hope for more equality to separate men and women into warring classes. It works too. I’ve watched it worsen male-female relations for a half-century.)

 

8 Comments

Filed under sex differences

8 responses to “2004. RANDOM THOUGHTS—Group 92

  1. surfercajun

    excellent choice of subject matter! Scary situation, but knowledge IS power.

  2. Thank you again. I’ll especially give your top advice to my daughter, her Bible class teacher and her other friends. It happened to my grandmother in 1922 and she lived with the shame as an unmarried mother for many years, until she realized she had nothing to be forgiven of. She married my wonderful granddad who smoothed out all her worries.

  3. anon

    I hope I’m never in that situation… but wouldn’t it matter if the rapist respected his mom or not? If not, maybe he would not care? Or am I missing a bigger principle?

    Your Highness Anon,

    You’re missing nothing. You’re right about respecting his mom.

    I tried but can’t figure out a possible way for girl to just say hi to mom before dating a guy. So, I figure she should just say it anyway. The surprise may shock just enough to give her other options.

    Guy

  4. thetruth01

    Thanks Sir Guy I wish I knew about handling date rape when I was in the situation. Although I didn’t meet his mom he did tell me his mom was proud of his accomplishments so mentioning her would have struck a cord.

  5. cocoa

    Hello sir Guy and congrats on the blogs milestone (2000+). Well done for you and for me. I feel and I know I have replaced some old set of attitudes and actions with brand new ones. Ones that are and were always close to my heart but wasn’t sure if they were right and useful for me or not. Key changes are : Attitude of gratitude. Ongoing pretty time regardless of where I am going or how I am feeling. I will always be a target regardless ofmy status, therefore cocoa always have to protect herself, keep her self respect intact and always show respect to my husband whether he’s around or not , whether I am pleased with him or not. And lots more…

    Sir Guy, with the 2nd point. What are the elements that makes a man less respect another man? His job? His income? His wife? His attitude and manners??? And once this respect is less or lost can it be resotored? Also, does the same principles apply to man respecting a woman?

    Thanks.

    Your Highness Cocoa,
    My response grew into a daily article, #2006.
    Guy

  6. SouthernBelle

    Sir Guy,

    I find some of the male nature instincts resonate with me for my natural inclinations within myself although I do not admit this to anyone openly. I’m afraid those inclinations may diminish the compatibility with a Mr.Good Enough. Despite my self awareness now of this, it seems this is not “unlearn able” but is my true nature. What are your thoughts?

    Your Highness SouthernBelle,
    A response for each sentence: Yes, and your sensitivity and expertise are working good for you. True, and it’s good that you’re aware. True, and you’re blessed to recognize the difference between lessons learned and your nature. Makes decisions much easier.
    Guy

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