2049. Submissive #07 — Submissive is More Honorable

I continue with the list of situations that make women more aware of what’s happening mentally between the sexes. Let me know if the subject is beginning to drag. I have other subjects that I can intersperse. There’s probably 4-6 dailies left in the submissive series—re-titled out of respect for that female blessing endowed at birth.

Nearly synonymous, I often interchange dominance and submission. It depends on which term seems to best fit the situation but in most cases it means the same thing to the woman on the receiving end of typical male expectations.

14. Competition in marriage favors the primary leader—the husband. Cooperation favors the rest of the team—wife/mother and children. Sustaining her team successfully without challenging his role and self-prescribed authority generates peace in the home, which he expects her to deliver. [Guy adds: From such generated peace with husband not interfering, relationship experts generate harmony. It’s a natural urge and it brightens the female future.]

15. The mutual exchange of spouses pleasing each other, combined with going along to get along, smooths out stormy marital ripples. What is the best model to produce it? Women visualize this model, one head of the family leaves room for one neck to turn the head. There’s much to be said for it for three reasons: 1) It works pretty well as a strategic model and discourages wife from wandering deeply into husband’s domains. 2) It proclaims her role to be subordinate and submissive and thus sounds okay to husbands to talk and even joke about it. 3) It casts her in the role of indirect leader rather than trying to lead husband directly by challenging his authority. [Guy adds: Even that model can be improved upon. I’ve described it elsewhere as a family rank structure. It embellishes the influence of the neck and softens the head’s need for dominance. It’s too lengthy for here, but if you’d like to see it let me know. I’ll put it aside for a few days.]

16. During dating, courtship, and engagement, women lay the groundwork to win or lose in the marital power game. As the relationship expert, a very feminine female knows intuitively how to expect and handle a man’s sense of dominance and his expectation for her submission. Unfortunately, not all women listen to their hearts; for various reasons they automatically give in to their man’s expectations. [Guy adds: When women forget or forego living by what their heart tells them, they weaken their political power in the home. For example: She knows that she deserves to be treated respectfully—first as person, second as wife/girlfriend/fiancée, third as prospective mate. When she lets the first sign of disrespect pass without mention, she opens the gate. More will follow. His disrespect poisons their relationship. The only antidote is to squelch it unflinchingly at the first instance and until it stops. Do whatever it takes. Of course, if he doesn’t stop after just a couple instances, he’s nowhere near Mr. Good Enough. Evidence of disrespect means that his respect is insufficient to generate more than just a little love in his heart. So, turn him into Mr. Dumped, because he will never become her Mr. Right even after decades of marriage.]

17. Each woman knows to compete to prevent conquest before she is ready for it. However, she isn’t aware of one part of the male nature. Her discouragement of his initiative wins his respect, which is the foundation of his love. After conquest, however, competing with him weakens her likeability, the very thing he expects to keep him in pursuit. [Guy adds: Directly resisting his dominance is to challenge him. He expects and accepts it before but not after conquest. Unfortunately, women have indirect ways of resisting submission after conquest, but it sours their own attitude and weakens their likeability.]

18. Her boyfriend’s dominant attitude is offensive, domineering, and borderline unacceptable. Red flags wave. What to do? She needs a boyfriend or potential groom. She may be desperate! This one may be her last chance! There have been so few possible candidates lately! What to do? [Guy adds: If she cannot stand to be that dominated before marriage, why should she expect him to be anything but worse after marriage? Men don’t change to please their woman except before conquest, and even that can be faked.]

Can you use some more wife-promoting situational awareness? Come back tomorrow.



Filed under courtship

3 responses to “2049. Submissive #07 — Submissive is More Honorable

  1. Cinnamon

    Sir Guy,
    This is a great series and I look forward to more.

    In terms of other subjects, however, I would like to see an article that attempts to resolve the tension that arose between some commenters on the “Single Women Don’t Pay” articles (also a great series).

    Specifically, Some Other Guy brought up the fact that to him it would be a “red flag” if a woman never paid, and a couple of the married female commenters concurred.


    I, in turn, brought up the example of how this plays out under special circumstances such as dating a divorced man who is generous but supporting two households and without a money tree in his back yard.

    I would like to see a more in-depth discussion that attempts to resolve these tensions, with particular discussion of special circumstances (such as financial constraints because of divorce). Are things really as black and white as you say on the “Single Women Don’t Pay” issue or are there perhaps a few slightly grey areas?

    Your Highness Cinnamon,

    I have no answer for your gray area and special circumstance questions. Those are personal decisions and the right ones for those involved, provided the women are happy and the men satisfied with the results that followed the dates.

    I am preparing another summary article for women not paying. More logic and reason that may bore you.


    • Cocoa

      Hello Cinnamon (just typing your name and I can smell it! I love cinnamon)
      Not sure if I am in a position to answer your query, but I can only try.

      Some other guy has a valid point only IF, only if the man is not smart enough to figure out the lady he’s dating. Of course it’s a red red flag if the woman takes takes and never give! Women are givers . However, they should never give money. Give encouragement, give smiles, give warm welcome. Give advice where appropriate for example, this place is expensive and I don’t like see you spending that much on food, let try this place (have to be ultra careful with this one though)

      Now, what if the man you’re dating or getting to know is a good man but financially not in a great position, here I would say why go out then? Where do you guys go that will send the man broke?! How about a picnic and the lady prepares the food and the man pick her up and drop her off. How about a nice cafe and instead of buying 2 pieces of cake share one piece, of course if he suggests that you start running! But you suggest it and see what and how he reacts.

      Now if a man can’t afford, for whatever reason, a picnic or a cafe, then maybe he should wait a bit till he sort his finances out, instead of going here and there and expect you to pay half. DO NOT PAY.

      Read again “single women don’t pay II”. It’s the best. Read it twice or thrice.

      Again if a man has financial issues that he can’t take a lady out then he should hide a bit till he restore his issues. These issues are HIS and not yours.

  2. MLaRowe

    I always felt like there was something of a animalistic underlying reason for a man taking a date to dinner. As though he was (in a sense) proving that he would be able to care for me (and any offspring). Fancy tablecloth and beautiful china disguise it but when it comes down to it isn’t that what such an action is actually showing? To pay for that, any part of it, is to muddy up what seems like a rather honorable intention, his showing his worth to her.

    Your Highness MLaRowe,
    I love it when pretty women come up with such descriptive phrasing as “muddy up what seems like a rather honorable intention, his showing his worth to her.”

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