2133. Compatibility Axioms #601-610


601. Sex does not bond men, which is why civilized cultures have marriage vows to shift a man’s focus from crotch to conscience. [214]

602. It takes time and a man’s many routine and not-so-routine actions to uncover his character. Yet, our foremothers discovered this truth. Character is a far better predictor of a man’s long term reliability than his words of affection or verbal commitment. IOW, he’s more like what he does than what he says he is or an interested woman thinks he is. [214]

603. Erotic attire inspires short-term relationships. Her appearance attracts, but to her man it reminds too easily of someone else’s booty. [214]

604. From being denied conquest by a woman, men learn to respect, appreciate, and admire her defenses if logical and well-reasoned. Admired in spite of refusals makes her fascinating to men until she discloses her price, namely believable and dependable obligations about provide/protect. Then, each man has opportunity to decide if she’s worth her price. [214]

605. Women can persuade their man indirectly and he responds favorably with self-motivation. Try to motivate him and he reacts de-motivated and responds unfavorably for her. [214]

606. Promiscuous women eventually conclude they lead an unfulfilled life. [214]

607. Pre-marital qualifying of a potential Mr. Good Enough starts with this simple logic: He either honors her standards and expectations for their sexual relationship and MAY become qualified. Or, he doesn’t and disqualifies himself as good enough. A man’s respect of her is and will remain inadequate, if he will not honor a woman’s wishes/requirements about her sexual uniqueness. [214]

608.She knows more about how women think and less about how men think. Therefore, women trust men more easily than they trust women. It confirms the principle that women compete with women for a man and lose when they compete with men expecting they will be liked, appreciated, loved. [214]

609. A single woman reaps her own soft-headedness when she yields sex based on a man’s words. If the words of conquerors were backed by strong conscience in each, there would be little need for marriage vows. [216]

610. Women seek casual sex and one-night stands for fun or to escape loneliness.  Their willingness sends messages of unfaithfulness. It signals to a man that she values herself poorly. She eagerly parts with her most prized possession (as he sees it) for virtually nothing. So easy for him! She’s unfaithful to herself. How then could or would she be faithful to one man? [216]

16 Comments

Filed under How she wins

16 responses to “2133. Compatibility Axioms #601-610

  1. gonemaverick

    Sir Guy,

    the reminders are always appreciated. thank you.

  2. Eric

    Sir Guy:
    602/604: It’s too bad more women don’t understand these points. The better men will typically work for what they value.

    605: I had a question about this because it’s been discussed in the Manosphere a lot lately. There seems to be a mindset being promoted that practically any shows of favor or respect towards women is somehow unmasculine. Do you think that attitude is a reflexion of men who’ve internalized feminist values themselves?

    Sir Eric,

    Re 602/604: Amen on both points.

    Re 605: I agree that some exists of men internalizing feminist values, but I want to address this: “…any shows of favor or respect towards women is somehow unmasculine.” IOW, women don’t deserve to be treated well by men trying to remain ‘real men’. That’s the masculine message if I interpret you correctly.

    Now what could possibly prompt men to care so much about relationships in general that they want to get revenge? Perhaps it’s the way women behave, which means they must be acting in ways against their relationship expertise and best interest relative to men.*

    Of course men aren’t innocent. They overdo it. They take offense with one woman and take it out on others. Revenge thinking spreads and—most importantly—mutual lack of respect and even disrespect grow.

    * For a description of the extreme side and the root of trending anti-feminine and, consequently, anti-male behavior, read “Female Chauvinist Pigs” by Ariel Levy.

    Guy

    • Miss Kitty

      Eric, i don’t know how old you are
      but perhaps, in the life of men in 2015, it could be possible, since many were NOT raised within a marriage situation… and don’t know the interactions of husbands and wives, or better yet, mothers and fathers together
      many were raised by WOMEN ONLY and perhaps their ‘boyfriends’ along with their female friends and ‘boyfriends’

    • My Husband's Wife

      These are really interesting comments and insights, Sir Guy and Eric…and another great post, by-the-way. I’m sure enjoying learning here!
      I have a couple of questions regarding the male “gaming” movement and its relation to feminism.
      1. Are men developing and promoting these “gaming” techniques to deal and compensate for modern feminist behavior in women?
      2. Do you have any idea when this “gaming” gained popularity? Men have always had a sexual agenda to conquer women (naturally), but this seems different…teaching/sharing techniques. Or is it the same old strategy, just new technology with everything being online.
      3. Wouldn’t real “game” competitor’s not want to reveal their strategies to other male competitors? It’s funny to me that they share all this info with each other. I get bragging about conquest, but sharing strategies seems odd. In the past, it seems like men/women just “knew”. Games were played, but not talked about.
      I’d appreciate your insight into some of these matters as I’m a bit confused by the whole gaming movement. In my day (80s) people just “did” and seemed to “know” better how to deal with the opposite sex. It just seems to have gotten worse the past few years especially.

      Your Highness My Husband’s Wife,

      1. Absolutely. Eric makes this point: “…access to cheap and easy sex without having to take on male responsibilities.” Younger siblings develop themselves to be different from older siblings. In fact, a new ‘development generation’ arrives about the time the previous bunch of kids enters first grade. The newest generation has to have its methods of ID. They want and get current style toys first, standards and expectations second, and produce different outcomes without exemplifying older siblings. To copy a kid more than about 6 years older is to destroy one’s cred.

      2. Eric is right again, and especially with this: “[Modern practice] makes conquest, rather than commitment the ultimate goal.” But it goes deeper as to cause. Several decades ago men had little sexual experience. Not much to talk about. Now, however, they have it abundantly in quantity, quality, diversity, and plenty of media for ease of spreading. So much so that it begs sharing to confirm one’s sexual expertise.

      3. Nope. Men are no longer in competition with men for women, much less a specific one. Women have picked up that role; they compete with men for sex and compatibility in the mistaken hope it will lead to permanent connections. Not likely men can’t respect women when they fill that role.

      Silence, yes, about one’s game plan regarding the unconquered. Don’t want a buddy to get there first. But, for the conquered, help your buddy out. Disclose her weaknesses and how to get around them. What are buddies for if not to help conquer the unconquered?

      It’s an unattractive scene and scenario for women, but they bring it on themselves. They please other women and let men strangle on the absence of sincere input from women as to how relationships oughta operate and succeed. Feminism taught women to talk to other women about men; men tend to resent and resist that out of their basic nature.

      Guy

      • Eric

        My Husband’s Wife:

        1. Yes: one of their core beliefs is that women are feminists by Nature. In reality, though, I think they are mutually dependent on feminism because they can retain access to cheap and easy sex without having to take on male responsibilities.

        2. About a decade ago; but it’s a more refined version of the older male conquering techniques. And the other difference is makes conquest, rather than commitment the ultimate goal.

        3. I’ve wondered about this too. It seems that men who had ‘infallible’ secrets for conquering women wouldn’t share it. But I will point out that the whole Game movement has some very eerie cult-like aspects to it. There’s a quasi-religious element to it that really comes across as sinister.

        • My Husband's Wife

          Dear Eric,
          I appreciate hearing your insights on the matter. Thank you for taking the time to answer the questions I posed. I sure enjoy hearing another gentlemanly perspective (such as yours) on these issues we are facing as a society today. From your answer to #1, it seems both men and women get short term gratification–but ultimately both sexes lose out in the end.

      • My Husband's Wife

        Dear Sir Guy,
        Happy Monday to you! I sure appreciate the thorough explanation as the gaming techniques have always puzzled me as it didn’t seem to be around in the 80s when I was dating. It was more the natural unspoken “game” between men/women. Today hearing the techniques, it seems funny and quite unnatural/scripted to me. My BS meter would definitely go off.

        • My Husband's Wife

          Another note to add on this subject of gaming: I recently read on a site (the Illimitable Man link posted on your blogroll) an interesting quote on the “Manosphere” which could also be true: “I believe the lack of tangible real world male spaces is one of the underlying social issues that led to the creation of the manosphere. However, this is merely a symptom of a far bigger problem, the breakdown of the traditional family.” It’s taken from the article, “Cult of Feminism and it’s Fabrication of History.” It seems we always come full circle to the core of these issues being “family.” Both sexes have been broken down damaged, and these are just the results manifesting in society.

          Your Highness My Husband’s Wife,
          You’re an astute observer and reasoner. Gamesmanship and other disruptive techniques to compatibility can be traced back to family breakdown from one or more of five causes: father missing, both effective discipline and leadership as subjects misused or unknown, mother propagandized to disbelieve in the natural basics of her relationship expertise, and mistaken belief that love conquers all.
          Guy

          • Eric

            My Husbands Wife & Sir Guy:
            I totally agree that Gaming sounds superficial and scripted. Part of the problem with the breakdown of society (and also the mutual antagonism between the genders incited by femihags) is that it’s reduced relationships to processes rather than following our natures and seeing uniqueness in individuals.

            I’m still single and, following Sir Guy’s earlier advice, I’ve been finding that NOT following the script has generally good results
            although that approach sometimes confuses modern women (it’s something they don’t expect). But the better women are intrigued by that, while the lesser ones fall away.

            Sir Eric,
            I pass to you the same compliment earned by My Husband’s Wife. That is: You’re an astute observer and reasoner. Your contributions are also so very clear, thanks.
            Guy

  3. KitKat

    The best solution would seem to me when two high school sweethearts get married. They will have financial difficulties, but the high school sweethearts or when the people met each other really young, and have basically just learned their sexuality together, those are the lucky ones. I know I wouldn’t want my daughter if I had one to be a young inexperienced girl and marry a man that had a lot of experience. But isn’t generally what men want, to selfishly have their fun? Personally, since I have never wanted children, or for women that don’t want children, I don’t think it much matters, personally, I was in LTR from a young age and this past year married. And I just don’t agree that if something happened and we broke up, it’s because he was only after sex. If he did, he hung around a long long time anyway. And he is someone, who in my opinion, could have just about anyone.

  4. KayKay

    Sir Guy,
    I have a troublesome problem and I am hoping for a quick answer, at your convenience.
    Recently, my husband and I separated due to an abusive incident which occurred in the form of my husband shoving me. Cops were called, he spent a night in jail, and I moved out. Since then, we have attended counseling, he’s been diagnosed as bipolar and he has quit drinking (which was a significant issue).
    For two months he has made significant efforts to not lose his temper around me. We have attended counseling on a regular basis, and now he’s frustrated. He’s frustrated because he feels like I haven’t given an inch and that I’m not meeting him halfway in all of this. I haven’t been able to give him a clear idea of when I will be home, but I have spent significant time around him, trying to work on our issues. A few day ago, he reached a point of frustration where he has now cut me off. When I say “cut me off” I mean in the forms of communication, seeing one another and ‘intimacy’. He has now decided to no longer attend counseling sessions. Financially, he has left me well off and that’s not an issue.
    I am hoping for reconciliation. He claims the same, He has called occasionally to ask questions pertaining to our marriage, but he has ignored my efforts to communicate with him regularly, which I believe is vital to us working through this. He says that he’s giving me the separation that I wanted.
    My question is this: do I continue to reach out to him, hoping that he’ll relent? I feel he has placed me in a position where I’m the only one fighting for this marriage.

    Your Highness KayKay,
    I’m not sure I can help you here, but I’ll consider another way.
    Guy

    • ari

      Lady kaykay,
      I’m sorry you are going through this and I will chime in please forgive me. I have been in your situation and understand. Perhaps your husband thought that counseling would appease you and speed up the reconciliation process. Now that he sees you are holding your ground he is `punishing ‘ you. In order to have trust again it takes many months of repeated respect and good will. You are doing well to wait it out. He needs to understand that the offense was serious…That he has to prove himself to you not the other way around. Be strong. Best wishes. I hope it works out for you.

    • That Horse Is Dead

      Hi Lady KayKay,

      I, too, have been in a similar situation. While my situation is obviously personal, I can perhaps share some insight that I now see nearly 10 years after leaving my marriage. First and foremost, you must focus on your own recovery. Someone has to break the cycle, let it be you. The healthier you get, the clearer you will be able to see the “log” in your brother’s eye. Get counseling for yourself regardless of whether he does or not. In addition to one-to-one counseling, join a support group and make a commitment to attend the meetings, such as Celebrate Recovery, even if others don’t have your exact situation. You will find encouragement there. If you do not have a close relationship with Christ, get closer to Him.

      Regarding your husband, if diagnosed with bipolar, he needs to be under the care of a physician and getting treatment. Your own counselor can help you understand this condition and how to support him. If he doesn’t get help for the bipolar, and likely alcoholism, how can you have a healthy marriage?

      Finally, it doesn’t sound like he respects you, perhaps all women. This is a problem with his thinking and will take a lot of work on his part to change. Until he can admit the root reason he doesn’t like women, he will keep playing the revenge/punishment game with you. He’s upset because you’ve rocked the boat and he’s no longer in control. If you cave without him meeting your requirements consistently over time, he knows what he has to do to get away with it the next time, and he loses more respect for you. And next time, the abuse could be much worse.

      I’m sorry you have to go through this. My heart goes out to you.

  5. surfercajun

    I apologize if this seems rather cut throat…. but the one with the most to lose acts desperate. I echo Ari… hold out. It was you that had your female sensibilities offended, not the other way around. ….been there, done that…. If I could take a guess, he is making you feel like you are the one that is cut out, trying to get back into the fray, the group, it was your fault…. it makes you feel as though you are suffering because you want to join back with him the way in which animals are cut from the group making them desperate to want to join back, because you are in a sense, one flesh….

    I feel your pain. 😦 Please keep us posted. This hurt my heart reading your post. I shall pray.

  6. prettybeans

    Mr Guy where are you? You are in my thoughts and I do hope that you are keeping well.

    Your Highness Prettybeans,
    All goes well but thanks for caring.
    Guy

  7. prettybeans

    Ah sorry I’ve just realized that the problem was on my end..I haven’t been receiving new blogposts and I thought that something was wrong.

    As always thank you for your hard work Mr. Guy – men are never more handsome than when they prove reliable and consistent.

    Have a good day! 🙂

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