2362. Housewifery and Its Influence

At 2361 Her Highness Beloved described some past domestic conditions:

“I just saw something on the whole temperance issues of the late 1800’s where men were going and spending their entire paycheck on booze, getting drunk, beating and maybe raping their wives (who obviously had nowhere to go to be safe) and it was women’s DEMANDS that had to make this stop.”

It provides an opportunity to explain a little more of what women never hear.

From the mid-1800s, early in the Industrial Revolution with massive changes arriving daily in society, the suffragettes used booze, intemperance, and wasting of paychecks as anecdotal evidence to advance their agenda. Their political movement resulted in Prohibition and the right to vote 70 years later.

My point is ONLY this: If it had been as bad as feminists now claim, many more women would have become suffragettes, joined the movement, and gotten results many years earlier. Anecdotal evidence is good for political argument but it neither provides much political pressure nor contributes much to improving society.

Historical evidence shows that this nation for three centuries has melded and merged two strongly male-dominated religions into our female-dominated Judeo-Christian culture. American society has been in continual shaking that has resulted in upgrading the status and treatment of women. Most of it done in the home under the influence of wise women. Prohibition and right to vote are salient outside-the-home accomplishments.

Women are born to BE good in their own eyes and get there when they DO good. Men are born very different. Born with no interest to BE good, they are, however, born capable to DO good. It takes women—from birth through puberty especially but also beyond—to influence males to motivate themselves to DO good so that they learn to BE good, which is essential for women and children to benefit from a man’s presence and help fulfill female hopes and dreams.

American freedom enabled women to do that. Wives encouraged husbands to build and bring home the prosperity of their labors. Combined, the life of females continually improved over three centuries. Where else have wives and mothers done so well? Middle East, Asia, Africa?

As women go, so goes society. At the macro level, men follow the female lead. Women establish and maintain whatever values, standards, and expectations people live by. Not churches, not men, not businesses, but women; they have the freedom and make the final choices at the micro level—home—that compound into the results we see at the macro level—society.

If it actually means anything except to political activists, we still have a patriarchy in name, but a matriarchy in effect. What women want, they can have, but they have to get what they want most—marriage, family, and extended family—by exploiting the male gender that surrounds them with masculine expertise.

(Of course, those that don’t want to birth and raise a family have freedom to do otherwise, but they also set other values, standards, and expectations that infringe and weaken family stability and a wife’s progress. Much as we see happening today with celebrity worship, demeaning of certain groups, women stealing husbands, and hatred overpowering love as the cardinal principle for guiding one’s life.)

Balance used to be achieved by wives dominating home and culture, and husband dominating workplace and society. Wives dominated the family future, and husbands dominated the family present-day. It put wives in the role of being able to lead husbands indirectly. When all wives do it, men are encouraged to dominate their place in society for the primary purpose of promoting the best interest of their own family.

Merry Christmas to all, and to all, a “Do right.”



Filed under Culture & Politics, Dear daughter, sex difference, The mind, Uncategorized

20 responses to “2362. Housewifery and Its Influence

  1. On an additional note: weren’t many genuine issues of women lacking rights actually fought on the hearth? Housewives going on strike to demand voting and land-owning rights, all the way back to Ancient Greece where wives’ labour (housework) was outsourced to keep women powerless and obedient. Whenever women have educated children, cooked meals and maintained the home, they have had leverage to argue for just treatment. Whenever women or their husbands have outsourced housework, women are treated poorly by men.

    Your Highness Superslaviswife,
    Last two sentences make so much sense relative to human nature. Outsource housework, so she lounges. He resents that she contributes nothing. Her words weigh less and he probably doesn’t want to hear it. Her worth doesn’t leave the bed except to make him look good in public, a showboat. Sex does not sustain a relationship, and others on his arm can make a man look good. Those who don’t contribute don’t own much of what a man brings in. Ergo, outsourcing housekeeping and child-raising makes for instability.

  2. ChildofRa

    So like Beyoncé says in her song ‘Run the World (girls)’

    “My persuasion can build a nation
    Endless power, with our love we can devour
    You’ll do anything for me”

    Your Highness ChildofRa,

    Beyoncé has a theoretical point with one exception.

    It’s the essence of human nature, when men are free, and each woman follows the heart she is born with and not the mind she learns to follow to get her way short-term, please or follow others, or be popular. The qualities of love and goodness in and shareable by the female heart are sufficient to crush one hardened male heart so that he morphs into being duty bound to providing and protecting his own with and through kindness.

    That’s in one home. When most homes are similar, wives indirectly govern society. Each day they send husbands to work and expect them to make society more female friendly, which brightens the female future, which is a woman’s primal need.

    I disagree with Beyonce, however. “With our love we can devour” doesn’t work if she means to imply constant attention, eternal affection, smother love. I think girls interpret it that way. (Inexperience and “girls” in the title.)

    A woman’s attention and affection does not satisfy a man. As a man sees it, her love is the way she treats him willfully, encouragingly, and respectfully in all things and especially depends on him as if her life depends on him. It all arises out of her affectionate nature, sense of importance to others, and natural ability to do those things with an open heart.

    Not all — and probably only a few — men deserve such womanly love. But, they all do expect something pretty close to it.


  3. jubilee


  4. Meow Meow

    ITA Sir Guy! The USA has been a very unique and dynamic place in the world. Despite the ups and downs we women have it good here and there’s no place I’d rather be. We are a country in constant change and although there are dark times afoot the fact I live here gives me hope that somehow we will find our way back to balance in both the political and domestic sphere. i just wanted to say I hope you are having a very Merry Christmas. You are a terrific writer. Thank you for being there and doing what you do for us.
    Meow Meow

  5. surfercajun

    Merry Christmas, Sir Guy and all you lovely ladies AND gentlemen!

  6. GraciouslyDeclaredBeautiful

    To Mr. Guy,

    It’s about time to express to you my gratitude about your amazing site about things women never hear.Your insight and wisdom God has blessed you with on so many matters have been a great blessing to me. I will forever be thankful that God has lead me to this site and for your wisdom he has granted you with.

    I have been on quite a journey before coming to this site. Thank God that this particular journey was short! Though long enough to do lots of damage. I was a bench-warmer-church-going Christian at the time I came into my first ever relationship with a boy who happened to be one as well (Doesn’t sound like a good start does it? 😛 ). Flag poles upon flag poles hoisted up high with bright red flags were a-waving away but, me being the expert of my own life and definitely on how a good Christian relationship worked, ignored and detested any sort of heeding or advise anyone gave me, especially that of my parents. My mother actually found this site based on her ‘can’t sleep at night’ extreme worry for me. To which she made me sit down at every chance she got and read to me boot camp for girls which I thoroughly ignored and at that time really disliked the writer… My apologies! Clearly wasn’t in my right mind :s I now love the witty and sensibility writer who gives oodles of wise information to pretty women making them feel strong and confident, and I also now thoroughly enjoy reading WWNH every day ;D … Anyhooo, I was pushing down any guilt or conscience that threaten to make me acknowledge our wrongful doings and finally after five months of being fed-up with this worldly relationship weighing heavily down on my shoulders, I then decided to ask him if I could be moved up from being on the bottom of the priority list to which in the end resulted in a dumping. I was sad that we broke up but the moment we did, I felt this heavy weight left off my shoulders and I felt so free, and to some extent happy. I knew it was the right thing.

    It didn’t end all here though; a difficult start to a “new” life was hard, but deep down I knew it was the road to recovery. Acknowledging and confessing all my sins to God was humbling. Asking for forgiveness from parents, also humbling. Restoring my relationship with my mom (we’re pretty tight now :)). Finding the most godly girlfriend who happens to be my sister in-law has helped me in this roller coaster journey. Asking forgiveness from my ex-boyfriend for not being the godly girlfriend I should have been, felt freeing. Gone were the busy nights/weekends, and gone were all my friends, except for a few check ups here and there, which was like a double punch to the gut. Freed myself from two girls who I drove to college with because of the stress of being bullied. My days and nights became filled with reading the bible, WWNH, praying, journaling, and crying over the stupidity of my sins, and also thankfulness to my gracious God and Saviour who in His mercy made me pure and loved me through it all.

    Seven months later, I finally felt I was on my feet. My last term of college was coming up in January with no stress, and I was single, ready to mingle 😉 when… the old ex asked to talk that very day… I was in shock, but armed with WWNH and maybe with a wee bit of sass, told him he would have to wait until after Christmas to see me(which was a week away). He asked me every day that week if we could hang out and you bet my bottom dollar I was busy. Sometimes, I was so busy just petting my cat. The 27th of December I agreed that he could pick me up and we could go for coffee. He asked for forgiveness and was sorry for what he had done. I didn’t let him off the hook that easy, there was a series of things he had to do to make sure he was serious about dating me, he was willing to do them all, and has changed so much for the better. He is now leading us in devotions, respects and honour my wishes, and loves me but most of all God with his whole heart. I am so proud of him and admire him for his accomplishments. We now have been dating for 11 months, bought a house which we will gain ownership in the spring, and have plans to be married this coming summer 🙂

    Looking back on God’s providence to me these past two years, has been incredible! From a life without God, to living for Him, has resulted in bountiful blessings, so “… let my song forever be, my only boast is you(God). Hallelujah! All I have is Christ! Hallelujah! Jesus is my life!” – song from Sovereign Grace “All I have is Christ”. (A song that describes my life to a T) Being equipped with WWNH and God’s word has made me happy woman and has blessed me with a happy man.

    With God’s love, my mother’s patience, my sister-in-law/new best friend listening ear, and Guys wisdom, I found the peace and joy I was craving all along. So thank you! Merry Christmas!

    From: GraciouslyDeclaredBeautiful

    Your Highness Graciously Declared Beautiful,
    Thank you, darling, for a wonderful Christmas gift. Young women mean so much to old men; we wish we could guide you better. Not many old men are as fortunate as God blesses me.

    Welcome aboard. It’s a great day when another pretty woman joins us on this cruise to WhatWomenNeverHear.

    • Sharon

      Thank you for sharing your story, Graciously Declared Beautiful. Both you and Sir Guy have been very articulate here. I add a quote from John Adams, 2nd President of the United States: “…the manners of women (are) the most infallible barometer by which to ascertain the degree of morality and virtue in a nation.”

      A Merry Christmas to the WWNH community!

      Your Highness Sharon,
      Thanks. John Adams, one of the more unrecognized greats as person, man, husband, and father more than president. I love his characterization in the movie “1776.”

    • Kristiane

      Queen Graciously Declared Beautiful,
      Thank you for the lovely story 🙂 God has truly blessed you with great wisdom and support. I pray for you to have a long happy marriage.
      Merry Christmas!

  7. Eric

    Merry Christmas to everyone here, and keep up the good work!

    Just a quick update on things: I hope to be doing more writing again after the holidays. My arm is getting a little better, the doctors seemed to have found the problem—but writing/typing with my left hand is difficult!

    Back when I was a Sophomore in HS, I decided to show that a 130-lb running back could stop a 250-lb linebacker. (Boys will be boys LOL)) The result was that I was walking around school with a cane about two weeks, and such was the end of my football career. That injury got reactivated a few months ago, and the opinion is that I have some nerve damage. It’s fixable, but has slowed things down a LOT in the meanwhile. The waiting lists to see medical specialists, thanks to Obamacare, hasn’t helped much either.

    Sir Eric,
    Glad to hear about recovery. You’ve become a highly readable staple here. Do I understand you are left-handed?

    • Eric

      Sir Guy:
      Thank you and I’ve gotten a lot of good advice here. LOL—no, I’m right-handed, but the nerve damage is affecting my right arm most, so I have to work the keyboard with my left hand if I try to type too long.

  8. Eric

    While I’ve been recuperating, I’ve been watching some films and TV series from the pre-Cultural Rot Era. They inspire me to new adventures, but are also somewhat depressing because I want to be doing what those guys are doing again, and also because the culture has sunk to such a low level from what it once was. I saw a television program from the early 1950s with the old commercials and there was Public Service Announcement encouraging boys and girls to sign something called the Freedom Scroll, which was going into a monument of some sort. Here were the points of it:

    1. I believe in the sacredness and dignity of the individual.
    2. I believe that all men derive their freedom equally from God.
    3. I pledge to resist aggression and tyranny wherever they appear on earth.
    4. I am proud to make this monument possible, and to sign this declaration of freedom.

    Imagine a television network asking young people to sign something like that today! We’ve actually sunk to the point where such beliefs are considered radical.

    • My Husband's Wife

      Yes, Eric! It’s wonderful to watch the old shows—and the men were men and the women were women. Just beautiful to see that balance and mystery between the sexes. And really interesting about the freedom scroll. The message was completely opposite then. In relating to Sir Guy’s “Big Government” article on the subject of doing what’s right instead of what’s commanded by superiors: Isn’t it interesting that old shows mostly had a messages or themes of doing the right thing no matter what the cost or taught some sort of a moral lesson? Those shows encouraged individuality and moral character as being of utmost importance. So it’s the chicken and the egg question: which came first—the decline of programming leading to the decline of society, or the decline of society affecting the programming?

      I canceled my cable a few years back and now when I see what’s on I can definitely see how most shows are just trash (promoting some progressive agenda—LGBT especially) and the news is a constant stream of fear mongering with key words being repeated over and over as if you’re being brainwashed!

      • Eric

        It really is like looking at foreign country—the images and values in the early to mid 20th Century media are so distinct from modern America that it doesn’t even look like the same place. It’s hard to say whether the modern media lead or follow the social decline (though they certainly participate in it and encourage it).

        • Good observation, Sir Eric. Being born to conservative parents in the mid-sixties, living in a conservative area, and having older grandparents on both sides, I caught the tail end of this wonderful way of life. It was truly peaceful yet strong and godly. It is still out here. I sincerely believe that people who wanted to change our social fabric to make us ripe for political change (Marxism) have targeted positions of influence for decades so as to erode such values.

  9. Sarina

    Nowadays, men look for housewifery in Asian countries since the women there are brought up with more domestic values, they claim foreign women as superior, but I guess the feminist thinking and obesity are the main reasons for men to look elsewhere. The white male is the main target of all feminists, the PC agenda protects men from other races.

    They even ditch models, it’s a bit weird to see average men treating these gorgeous women like trash, no respect, they often cheat on them, even stunning looks can’t keep a man loyal.

    • Eric

      Miss Sarina:
      It’s a combination of all three. Women more interested in working with a man to build a home; a lack of feminist attitudes and obesity and neuroses are problems with domestic women too. It’s not just Asia, one of my former clients married a girl from Italy.

      American women seem to have a decided preference for bad men, besides. I’ve known models here too and they’re the worst thug-chasers of all.

  10. Joanna

    Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year, Sir Guy and Readers,

    Sorry I haven’t been around for a while now, but I occasionally pop by to read some of your posts.

    Through your wise words, I have really learned a lot and thoroughly enjoyed my marriage of just over 2 years now.

    I now truly understand ‘devotion’.

    I recently had a miscarriage. And my God, I couldn’t believe the love and care my dear husband showed me. In the 3 weeks where I suffered daily pain and was virtually housebound, he cared for me like I was his child. He cooked, cleaned the house, cancelling his work commitments to care for me 24/7. He ran errands, even did some of my job when I couldn’t do it.
    And this was a man who couldn’t so much as boil an egg before!

    I now understand what you mean by Devotion. I tasted it at a time when I really needed it.

    Thank you for your wisdom. May the Good Lord continue to bless you.

    Your Highness Joanna,

    You’re most welcome. As evident by your situation, a man’s devotion is a tributary of his natural instinct to rescue a damsel in distress. Except that with devotion, he formalizes it by pledging himself to one woman. Inborn in the male heart capable to DO good, a man may never without a woman who needs him for just that purpose.

    I pray pretty regular that all my readers find the devotion you have found in your husband. If a woman can’t find such devotion, she needs to look inside herself and should study this blog more deeply.


  11. Mia

    Sir Guy, somewhat off-topic, but what do you think of marriage contracts? My intuitive self thinks that, if a woman calls for one, she knows in her heart that she is marrying the wrong man. My family thinks I’m naive and that I should get with the times. They say nowadays a smart woman asks for a marriage contract in order to protect her livelyhood. What do you think?

    Incidentally: Best wishes for the New Year!

    Your Highness Mia,

    Listen to your heart, the feminine and not the feminist side. Trust your instinct. How well have you ‘read’ men in the past? Let experience help you decide.

    Your family knows neither you nor boyfriend in any relationship the two of you might build. They want you to be able to recover from failure, which is to plan for failure. It’s natural for parents.

    But they aren’t qualified for anything but advising. Do you always follow advisors? Good leaders don’t; they consider all inputs and then decide what’s best for their self-interest.

    I admit character isn’t as strong nowadays as a contract, but—then again—you’re trying to build, sustain, and harmonize a relationship. Without a solid undergirding of trust, how long will it likely last?


    • Mia

      Sir Guy, solid advice as always. I wish you were my personal advisor. (actually you are to some extent) I consider myself a good leader at least what concerns my own life and I have always believed that to plan for failure breeds failure. In this case it was just a general conversation. My sister, a staunch feminist, was reporting that many of her girlfriends were getting a contract before marrying. She was recounting all the what-ifs and the horrible things that might happen. I realize now that that’s a typical feminist argument. My sister doesn’t like herself much, dresses sloppily and basically has an attitude that women are victims to men. In the past she has tried to negatively influence my relationships. I guess taking any advice from her is misguided. What’s your opinion: Do you think I should not discuss any personal matters with her?

      Your Highness Mia,
      You understand and have it right. Her advice is misguided FOR YOU. Last sentence vs. negative influence above: No, don’t discuss. We all become like those with whom we associate. Tough not to associate with sister, but you can curtail it by not discussing and not listening. Trust your gut, only you know what’s best for you.

      • Just a thought, Mia. My young son faced this from the other side. Girlfriend with a little money wanted a prenup when he proposed. He said that’s planning for the failure of our marriage, and I won’t play. If you distrust me that much, why should you marry me and I marry you? She agreed and they are happily married. He is now one of the most devoted husbands I know. I think the prenup would’ve hindered that because it would have undermined his free choice in the matter and eaten away at his legitimate pride in being a good man.

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