2429. Journey to Feminine — Group 03

The items below are not rules. They are ideas for consideration plus indirect suggestions to aid women when they wish to harmonize relationships and ease domestic turmoil. She’s the specialist to harmonize living with a man. It arises out of her being born opposite of men; that is, both able and motivated to build, manage, and sustain a long-term relationship.

  1. Learn to use silence to achieve your relationship objectives. Men neither use nor understand mysterious silence until they learn from you and deduce that it means for them to reconsider their opinion or position.
  2. The indirectness of a woman’s feminine nature serves even better after marriage. If he doesn’t have to be too deeply involved, respects her judgments, and she let’s everyone know he’s really the boss, then a man appreciates it when she dominates the incidentals of their life and it morphs into her dominance of home and family made acceptable by his dominance of her. The highly feminine hen can let him rule the roost in name while she rules the rooster in fact. She coaches him to learn to be highly grateful for what she does and respect her as person, woman, wife, and mother of their children. Shortcoming: Of course, he does it with too little affection showered on her; that’s also his nature and challenge for her to overcome.
  3. Women signal with cleavage that they expect men to think of sex. Well-shaped breasts attractively covered suggest the opposite, to think of her as woman and not sex object. Which works best for the female agenda, she want a long-term guy or short-term sex?
  4. Without his being fully aware of her abilities and advantages for  him, the feminine woman fills her role with dignity, presents a pleasant and likeable personality, and adds so much respectable but mysterious charm that a man learns he found a woman more interesting to be with than his buddies. Two requirements: She lets his attitude develop privately and she says nothing against his buds or his associating with them. Yes, she may have to put up with his getting his psychic income from them as well as her, but the fiancé or wife who tries to divorce him from buds will likely find she loses influence and maybe him. She has other ways to discourage him and many ways to compensate for time away from her.
  5. As a feminine woman, you don’t appear in public in sloppy clothes, poor grooming, or careless presentation; it demeans rather than promotes your best. Such appearances release others to treat you disrespectfully with less dignity and with consequent loss of worth and influence. Unlike among women, you’re not respected by men just because you’re a person. You will be regarded better for apparent self-respect that reflects out of your pride and evident self-worth; it works best and mystery and modesty provide a jump start. Men are much alike in that earning respect is a function of much more than appearance. Men don’t need and won’t earn respect from you like women need to earn it from men.
  6. Modesty is the most unique and easily justified feminine trait and proactive way of women getting their way. Use mystery as indirect and modesty as a direct way of attracting attention to you as girlfriend or wife instead of what you possess that men want so badly. Show pride that you’re hard-to-get before marriage. Female mystery surrounds modesty; it makes little sense to husbands but they easily accept as no threat to them and react with something like, “but if that’s the way she is, I guess I can go along.” Suppressing thoughts of sex with modesty earns masculine respect, the foundation of manly love.
  7. If and when you’re expected to do wrong, e.g., something immoral, refuse and state that you have firmest belief in yourself as being right. Refuse to explain further. Later, perhaps, you may perhaps hint at your core beliefs (but only if it’s someone or something higher than yourself such as moral code, Holy Bible, God’s word, your father’s mandate, your mother’s advice).

By adopting those and other feminine options and exploiting her feminine ability, a woman can more dependably sell herself and persuade a man that his best interest lies in a long-term marriage with her.



Filed under boobs, courtship, feminine, How she wins, marriage, Prince to pauper, sex differences

11 responses to “2429. Journey to Feminine — Group 03

  1. gonemaverick

    i like point no 1. it has served me well over the years to teach and mould the behaviour of suitors.

  2. Aidos

    In my quest to be more feminine, I’ve recently been silent, mysterious, and passive when interacting with men. Yet it seems like the majority of them expect dating to be very direct, easy and convenient.

    Most men’s profiles state that they’re ‘laid back’, and it’s frustrating how they use vague options to communicate on the dating site – they refuse to speak. They wink, they ‘like’ photos, they ‘show interest’, but very, very few write messages.

    The last man I met for coffee said he wanted to see me again before we parted. Then he sent a text later than night (Sunday) saying to give him a few days, and he’d think of something for us to do. Well, he waited until Friday afternoon to contact me, and by then, I had plans cause it was Easter weekend. I tried to show indirect interest by saying that, although I was busy, I’d enjoy seeing him the next week or weekend. He replied, ‘Let me know.’

    Well, I’m not gonna contact a man to ask him to ask me out, so I let it go, and he never contacted me again.

    I’m at a loss.

    The indifference seems rampant, and I’m obviously not doing a very good job at being charming and desirable. :/

    Your Highness Aidos,
    Men playing hard-to-get is described in posts 2029 and 2030.

    • anon...

      it looks like MEN are practicing the feminine… this was how women in the past practiced being unavailable, so they would get a marriage proposal….BEING THE BUTTERFLY

      Your Highness Anon.,
      Men playing hard-to-get is described in posts 2029 and 2030.

      • Aidos

        Exactly – and it’s across the board. The majority of men who contact me behave this way.

      • Meow Meow

        I guess some men would rather not lose out to other more dynamic men so they’d rather women take all the risk of rejection. Feels unnatural though and I think Aidos is right to not walk into those traps. FWIW the difference between the man who is now my husband and those men who were attracted to me but were too unsure/shy to ask me out was that he took the risks, asked me to marry him, and I respect him for it. Even with our problems, a big reason I stay to work them out is “Our Story”….a story HE loves retelling, with pride in himself, about how we met and the things we did together and how he asked me to marry him. Passivity/tiredness has now crept up on my hubby in old age and it annoys me and it is exhausting for me to carry so much of the financial burden in our household …but the fact remains I remember he wasn’t always like this and he HAS earned my respect in spades and those adventures in early dating and love which are meant to carry you through the rough times and older years. We define ourselves by these exciting happier memories even as we are struggling late in life. He is not proud of the economic situation we are in but he is proud of having a family, that he created.

        A man can’t be proud of a wife he put no effort into pursuing I think…Or at least i can’t say I’ve ever seen it so I instinctively ignored boys who tried to use this tactic….. even if it saddened me to cut things off. What is the best way for women/girls to react to V&U/hard to get behavior if it comes from a boy of interest to her? If this is a feminine way of behavior, do we remind men of their natural roles when WE embody this behavior? My handsome brother just couldn’t be bothered…used V&U tactics (and admitted it to me) most of his life……untill there was once a woman who evoked him to chase her! I still wonder how she got him off his butt into active mode! (No I didn’t ask….he ended up broken hearted and he didn’t want to talk about it!)

    • Aidos

      I’d read them before, but thank you for the refresher!

    • That Horse Is Dead

      Your Highness Aidos,
      With online dating, it’s a game. My guess is that he put you off till Friday wondering if something else would come along and when it didn’t he contacted you at the last minute. I think we as women take this personally when really, it’s not personal. Every man has an agenda. It’s best just to let these men pass on by and no reason to think he’s in a place in life to pursue you. I have yet to find a man online who makes a “chivalrous” effort to get to know me who isn’t 10 to 14 years my senior. I am probably much older than you, but I find a general trend online in this regard. The men my age want the younger trophy/easy sex, or they’ve never married and want women in childbearing age (10 to 15 years younger). So, if you’re open to dating older men, that may be a better group in the online arena. It’s obvious to me when I’m just one of many “fish” on a fishing line. Generally, these men try to juggle a lot of women at the same time and usually make minimal effort. However, don’t be too quick to discount yourself as uncharming and not desirable. The fact he met you for coffee is positive. Keep doing what you’re doing and you’ll learn a lot.

      • That Horse Is Dead

        P.S. To his “let me know” text, I’d reply, “I’m sorry. I’m not that kind of gal. Best to you in your searching for her.”

        • Shermy

          That’s great advice!

        • Aidos

          You’re absolutely right on all counts!

          One man I’m seeing is 68, and he’s a perfect gentleman – does everything right. And he’s also the only man who’s shown interest outside the online dating world. We met volunteering on Christmas Day.

          Your reply is so perfect! I’ll save that. 🙂

          I really appreciate the input from you ladies. I confess, I’m the poster child for Sir Guy’s soft-headed Sally, and mature advice from other women is rare. So, thank you.

  3. Jen

    Another fine post, Sir Guy, but I cannot help chuckling…once upon a time, isn’t it true that all of these things were considered common sense, passed on from mother (and even grandmother) to daughters, granddaughters, and nieces? It is, again, a good thing you are doing, ensuring these things are circulating for thoughtful women to consider and put into motion.

    Your Highness Jen,
    Yes, you’re right. They used to be common sense and taught to girls, who instinctively developed their intuition, because it fitted right in naturally with their self-development. They put themselves in charge of the values, standards, and expectations that guided men and women all across society. It made so much sense that girls and young women much more easily became the dominant figures for building and preserving lifetime marriage as the universally desired and accepted objective.

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