2489. Friendly Reminders — 06


  • Good reason exists to steer clear of men that act dictatorial; who expect total submission. Such men hate themselves and can’t truly love anyone. They insist on total submission and seek a submissive woman. If she fights back he respects her more, provided she wins without his getting violent. If she whimpers and shuts up, she loses respect. Submission both shows and reinforces his sense of significance, which is constantly confused and embroiled with self-hatred.
  • They separate and seek divorce. She thinks yielding sex will make ex more agreeable to her or their kids. Wrong! His respect for her will weaken further, although his suggestions or pleas may sound otherwise. The weaker his respect, the weaker his interest in negotiating fairly much less equitably.
  • The most reliable path to marital resurrection is for the ex-husband to be refused sex so long as they are separated. Her persistent refusals can re-earn his respect and rekindle his interest in her as the woman he first married. The wise woman also insists he demonstrate re-dedication by retaking their vows in public.
  • The need of self-importance in females works much like the need of self-admiration in males. Women are ambitious for what makes them important in life (aka relating with others as friend, spouse, mother, et al.). Men are ambitious for producing results (aka conquering females, competing, providing, protecting, problem solving).
  • A wife’s thoughts that husband is inferior to other men plants toxic seeds in her thinking from which emerge destructive relationship pressures. Thoughts of his superiority add to her ability to build harmony.
  • Being vehicles of the radical political left, Feminism and political correctness spread by exploiting immature people. They’re crushed under the wheels of mature sense made common by political ideology.

1 Comment

Filed under Culture & Politics, Dear daughter, feminine, marriage, sex differences

One response to “2489. Friendly Reminders — 06

  1. Beloved

    What about a husband who begins to treat his wife poorly, taking her for granted. etc. Should she refuse sex then or how does she get his respect back, assuming she hasn’t really done anything wrong to make it diminish?

    Your Highness Beloved,

    Once married, the use of sex to get your way is the wrong way. He earned unlimited rights by virtue of yielding his independence. You may disagree but he will fight to the bitter end to prove he’s in the right. You don’t want that unless you’re tired of him.

    To regain his respect, consider what you’ve been doing and do some things differently. Without pressure, complaint, demand, or offense, stand up more for your right to be heard, recognized, and stubborn than your normal manner.
    Examples:

    • “Please drop your paper (or mute the TV) a moment, I have something to say that’s very important to me.” Be deliberate and firm but respectful.

    • “My car is broke. I need it fixed ASAP.”

    • “The children need more of your attention. You read them their bedtime story tonight.”

    At the same time, back off on other matters. Examples:

    • Be much quieter about what you’ve done for him. Do it and walk away silently.

    • Recall and duplicate your engagement persona; how acquiescent were you then? Be more so now.

    • Don’t ask him for favors you previously asked him to perform. Be more independent around him.

    • Be more passive in his company and especially when he wants to do something together.

    Any and all of those should pique his curiosity, about which men want to do something. When he asks what’s wrong, it’s your invitation to respond with something like this:

    • I feel hollow inside. What happened to the marriage of my dreams? I neither blame nor expect you to change but our mutual respect seems to have fallen by the wayside. We seem of less interest to each other. Is it just a lot of little things? I know of no relationship problems, so I take full responsibility for little things that amount to doing wrong or not doing right. Can you isolate or identify what I can do better to restore faith in our relationship? Have you lost faith in us? Any answers about why we are not seeing mutual appreciation of what we do and respect for who we are together? Can you help ease my discomfort?

    Those are just ideas. You have to tailor them to your situation and risk tolerance.

    Guy

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