Her Highness MLaRowe inspired this article at 2499 with this remark: “Also since one’s financial assets will be used it takes a lot of unselfishness. That is the resistance part for so many.”
Selfish is not part of the female heart and weakens the majesty of females and especially mothers. In fact, it is foreign and gets there two ways: in childhood with poor upbringing, by seeking to fit in with the crowd as teen and adult, or both.
When a couple’s prime target is to mother and father a large family, like all else finances are not an insurmountable problem. Problems arise with lack or loss of dedication to build a body of kids—made better by their numbers—and up to whom two parents can pledge their lives together.
Kids, being self-developers, provide most of the motive power for family development. Parents can slide back into guidance roles while kids are relatively free to develop as one big gaggle of energy. They learn and teach at the same time just what it is that mom and dad expect of them. Parents can just enjoy the show and expect it will all come out well in the end.
Modern women have been taught the opposite of this. Large families enable mom to work less hard; she gets to do more of what she loves to do and less of what she has to do. One exception: If mom expects perfection in anything except close love for all, respect for husband, and gratitude for father, then her labors increase and she likes it less and less.
Siblings have greater influence on personality development of each other than do parents. Extra siblings are a goldmine for attractive personality development. Quality inculcated in one child spreads to the others, so parents have only to get the ball rolling of high quality in the first child or two and the others duplicate it. Not only is more the merrier appropriate, but so is more the easier and boisterous. And it takes a special man to live with the boisterous.
Advice: Ladies, whether you intend to have a large family or not, screen each Mr. Good Enough a few times this way. Casually visualize a huge family, how it would interact, what it would produce, how it could be handled, and what a marvelous success it would be for the kids growing up and later with adult closeness. Describe in detail all you visualize so that your date copies the images. You will learn from his reactions how he feels about children and having his own. How he appreciates your imagination, studies your intent, guesses at your mystery of even thinking of such things, and in general prepares his thinking to parallel yours. It’s a good screening technique.
If the thought of a large family truly terrifies him but he’s willing to listen to more, dig into him deeper. He shows promise, because he only needs encouragement to take on such a task, but you haven’t obligated yourself.
If your thoughts provoke his ire, offensiveness, or anything approaching anger, dump him. He won’t be a good father and probably not a good husband.