2561. Ten Steps to Win a Man’s Heart— Step 14: Leftovers


Life becomes clearer the more deeply people research relationships and what makes them ultimately succeed or fail. Those who figure it out the best, have the best chance of success. These leftovers from this series may help women figure things out better.

  1. She can unleash her love after conquest, so long as she doesn’t overdo it. Both smother love and mother love—even though accepted before conquest—expose her as either desperate or domineering. Thus, she weakens the foundation of whatever love he may have for her.
  2. Don’t pester a man to show or speak of his love. He has little interest in revealing his emotions, unless he wants something. So, keep him wanting something. If you have to pester him to hear I love you and similar expressions of affection, then deliberately use your best courtship techniques—charm, indirectness, patience, smiles. And do it before conquest; after that you will find little success.
  3. You need enduring love to replace romantic love that fades a year or two after conquest. The foundation is his devotion and bonded love that you earned and must preserve to guide marital progress when romance is no longer the main player.
  4. Men don’t recognize relationships as women do. Their relationship just is, broken or unbroken, okay or not. They especially don’t love a relationship, just her and marital success.
  5. If your relationship is not right or working well, it’s your business. His sense of duty does not apply as with marriage, which he recognizes as a job-like responsibility to which he is duty bound. Men behave quite differently between shack up and marriage, don’t they? Think of it his way. Relationship is about incidentals you can handle, and marriage is about his duty obligations.
  6. A woman’s happiness is based on the gratefulness she finds in her life and it compounds over the years to provide happiness late in life. Her happiness in the present does not carry into her future; only her gratitude does that. Steal her gratitude today, and she reaches to find more. She intuitively knows that she needs it, and instinctively knows that her future depends upon it. But it never comes to pass if she lacks self-gratitude, which is the source of finding gratefulness outside herself and enabler of her doing good and fulfilling her natural urge to be good.
  7. Men are born with a strong sense of responsibility and duty, which they spread as the equivalent of female love. However, some men can’t do it well. If mothers don’t raise boys with childhood chores and enable them to learn through responsibility and practice to appreciate and love work, then their sense of duty doesn’t fully develop. In which case, such men don’t appreciate the satisfaction that comes from work, job, responsibility, duty, and serving others. Their women become victims of motherly neglect. (Evidence today indicates that many mothers have been failing over the past couple decades, as many men refuse to work and find ways to escape responsibility.)
  8. Women benefit indirectly and greatly from freeing up their man who is willing to work. His freedom and her encouragement blends with and energizes him to naturally pursue self-admiration and satisfaction, makes male dominance less needful, and helps complete the self-fulfilling prophecy of becoming a better man. Moreover, her man gets more things done better by working to his satisfaction to produce, provide, protect, and problem solve for her.

Both sexes are born to get their way. It’s an endless battle that fuels compatibility to the satisfaction of both. He’s out to gain satisfaction, but it isn’t enough for her, not what completes her as fairly treated partner. She looks for more. She expects to receive love on top of or in lieu of satisfaction. If balanced with sufficient love added for her, the woman’s long suit of cooperation harmonizes well with the man’s long suit of competition. Harmonizing only requires daily satisfaction for both plus some extra love for her.

1 Comment

Filed under courtship, Dear daughter, feminine, How she wins, marriage, sex differences

One response to “2561. Ten Steps to Win a Man’s Heart— Step 14: Leftovers

  1. Anon...

    It also helps if their FATHERS are involved in assigning chores.
    Which, mom backs him up on.

    Your Highness Anon…,

    Absolutely. You’re 110% correct.

    It’s just my personal opinion. At least until puberty, families work best for mom to have her own support chore-assignment program to assist child development and father backs her up completely. Two reasons: 1) The power relationship works better when parents have their own clearly identified responsibilities. Each knows who does what and when and lack of interference demonstrates respect. 2) Kids, just like all of us, follow leaders best when they only have one boss to whom they must answer.

    Guy

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