2565. Default Motivations

Default motivations are those that reside in the psyche from birth and to which people turn when they lack other motivations. It is their nature in action.

Their natural and deep-rooted motivations differ, and a man’s is the simpler process. His prime motivator is to satisfy his sense of self-admiration, which he does through accomplishments. It’s a natural closed loop. 1) He seeks to admire self. 2) He accomplishes something—task, job, or R&R and being free to do so is itself satisfying—until his efforts satisfy him. 3) Satisfaction confirms self-admiration. He is free to energize himself to go around the loop many times daily. Moreover, he is self-sufficient. He can continually loop around the process without the help of others, unless he solicits it. The admiration of others may be appreciated but in the end it is unnecessary; he is independent at earning self-admiration (except boys are sometimes taught otherwise).

OTOH, her prime motivator is to confirm her sense of self-importance, which she does by doing something for others, spreading her love, and finding gratefulness in others. The last is the most productive, because feedback from gratitude she spreads confirms her importance and enough self-importance generates happiness. Her process is also a closed loop. But it always involves others, which adds to the complexity. She needs to prove her importance. 1) She finds reasons to be grateful for herself and others. 2) She spreads her love to confirm it. 3) Recipients express their gratitude by confirming her importance in their lives. Her self-importance thus confirmed, she returns to step 1).

A major theme of this blog is that the closer people act according to their nature inherited at birth, the more compatible they are as mates, happier as women, and more satisfied as men.



Filed under courtship, Dear daughter, feminine, marriage, sex differences, The mind

7 responses to “2565. Default Motivations

  1. 1jarofclay

    Excellent article. I have some comments on it that I’ll post when I get a chance.

    We live in West Palm Beach, Florida and are preparing for hurricane Matthew. It’s supposed to go by the coast this afternoon/ evening and it’s very large and powerful. Please, keep us in your prayers!


  2. Kay

    1jarofclay, I live in Jupiter! We really dodged a bullet. I feel terrible for everyone else that is now suffering because of the storm. Small world! Glad you are fine too

    • 1jarofclay

      Thank you Lady Kay. I’m glad you’re okay as welI and yes, it’s a small world indeed!

      We’re blessed to have been spared and our prayers are with those who went through so much destruction and even death in the Caribbean as well as those who might still face this powerful hurricane here in the U.S.

      Many blessings! 🙂


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s