2785. Virtue vs. Virtuous to Marry


A battle over virtual virginity heated between two readers, while I was away from my battle station and command post. I don’t want to stop disagreements, just define some terms more thoroughly as used in this blog built on how both sexes are motivated to react to one another.

The sexes differ at birth and are motivated to react to each other.

  • Virtue — Any quality in a woman that a man admires. A stimulation that helps motivate him to live with commitment to her and her other virtues. As used explaining human interaction, virtue is a stimulator and motivator. (Thus, virginity is neither virtue nor the only virtue except as each man decides it for himself.)
  • Virtuous woman — She’s thought to be virtuous only when he sees enough virtues to consider her good enough to marry. It’s one man’s independent decision.
  • Virtuous man — Each woman identifies her version of each man’s qualities that makes him worthy of her. Contrary to the position that women often take, the female nature doesn’t motivate women to marry virtuous men. Women marry to ‘inherit’ other attributes they value more highly than personal qualities; e.g., material possessions, dominant leadership traits, confessions of love and affection, apparent sexiness, or only man available and willing to marry.
  • Man-whore — Few men receive money for sexual favors. Promiscuous is more accurate for the sake of de-emotionalizing arguments. Even so, it appears that men seek wives with sexual inexperience and wives disregard the previous experience of husbands. Proof is rooted in sex differences at birth and history through the ages.
  • Player — Some guys copy the female hard-to-get technique and use it on women made vulnerable by feminist propaganda. It’s the more modern and accurate term for what women call man-whore. He’s after sex for the sake of sex, fooling women into yielding without his committing, not really interested in his targets for very long, and typically adultolescent in other behaviors.

All the above is prompted by small differences I have with two readers. One claims women want to marry virtuous man. Yes, perhaps, but it’s not a barn burning motivation to do so. What is a virtuous man; he’s much more than someone who foregoes sex before marriage. Too many other things in female life take priority over their ‘want.’

A man claims “only true virginity (outside of a few exceptions) makes a woman worthy of pursuit.” According to the male nature, this is more accurate. The closer to virginity she is or appears to be, the more worthy of his pursuit; the farther away the more discouraging.

I added those terms to the blog glossary at the Home menu.

4 Comments

Filed under Dear daughter, How she wins, marriage, sex differences

4 responses to “2785. Virtue vs. Virtuous to Marry

  1. That Horse Is Dead

    Sir Guy,
    Would a man put a woman too high on a pedestal that he labels himself as not good enough and won’t pursue her? Or could calling her virtuous be a vague and unavailable tactic to get a woman to lower her standards or just get an ego stroke? A man from my past continues to resurface but it never goes in a romantic direction (very similar to Lady Edith). I labeled him as V&U because of too many mixed messages and proceeded to cut off contact with him a year ago. A few weeks ago he contacted me through my job and found a way to work with me on a temporary project. When the project was finished, he paid over and above the invoice to give me a generous tip. He also said he imagines my image in a painting in his house…and says the woman he sees in it is pure, wholesome and demonstrating truth, honor, faithfulness and wisdom. This all feels like a horrible tease because of how many times he’s disappeared and now it seems he disappeared yet again. It’s to the point that I want to avoid church because he is there. My brain is trying to make sense of it especially as you write about men looking for a virtuous woman. What is the best way to proceed from here the next time he contacts me for more work help or any other excuse?

    Your Highness That Horse is Dead,

    The preponderance of his words and absence of supporting actions provides evidence that he’s basically a player, vague and unavailable, hard-to-get, and the females’ game. His next step, get you to fully disclosing yourself as you would to a woman you’ve just met. Don’t. It’s a weaker vessel you become.

    If you really want to figure him out, go on the offensive to uncover his intent. In church, if you can’t avoid him, stare him down, make his eyes shift before yours. If and when he acts offended for any reason, he’s planting guilt. A staredown with total silence is best for you. Someday, someway, he may shift from words to actions. In that case, you can start acknowledging and appreciating his ACTIONS designed to please you without other expectations.

    Guy

    • That Horse Is Dead

      Sir Guy,
      I assume the goal in exposing myself as I would to a woman is to search for weaknesses he can use for his advantage to conquer for sex. A year ago before I cut contact, he took me to lunch and said I had more self-control than any woman he’s ever met (I must be the only one not throwing herself at him for sex and chasing him). He’s quite the “eligible bachelor” but I’ve watched his character expose itself over time through actions. He does just enough to show his potential and then pulls back to give only crumbs. The whole situation has eroded my respect for him which is unfortunate. Most people would say how great a guy he is but its not good enough! I have not tried the staredown yet. I’ve tried friendly avoidance, professionalism, and calling out his bad behavior before cutting contact. I’m learning to embrace and enjoy my chaste singleness now. I’m grateful for the wisdom from this blog that continues to safeguard me from the regret of feminist thinking.

      Your Highness That Horse Is Dead,
      Congratulations on your successful recovery.
      Guy

  2. Maddy

    Thank you so much Sir Guy! I appreciate this dedicated post very much. I have a further question if I may: what advise do you have on raising two small children? We are thinking of having another child. I am not sure how to best manage two children so that one is not disadvantaged over the other and to still have the time and energy to put husband first.

    Many thanks again,
    Maddy

    Your Highness Maddy,

    By the time you get there, you’ll know exactly how to handle two plus husband.

    In the meantime, be on the lookout for an article or two about raising children in a greenhouse (key word). It should publish before second child arrives.

    Guy

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