2827. Love is Never Enough — 07: More Macro Stuff


Here’s another macro side of love, how the female heart imposes its will indirectly on society and culture. The male nature urges men to better themselves so they can accomplish more and more. It doesn’t mean they let women define ‘better’ or lead them to it. In fact, they resist it. So, women have to work indirectly on both men and their man. Female mystery, lovable personality, and feminine likeability are the greatest assets for women to get their way while programming husband’s motivations with breakfast, dinner, and pillow talk.

Women inherit a special motivational drive at birth. Whatever man they mate with, they want him to become better. Men resist direct attempts to be changed. So women have an indirect way to overcome. They are born motivated to be good. Men are born with the ability to do good, but no incentive to spark actions to do or be good. A woman confirms her goodness by doing good, and when she can get her man to do good, she is the better for it and he has pleased her by becoming a better man. It’s a strong motivation imperative in women, until individuals lose it to popular opinion or male dominance.

I’m fascinated by how Western civilization developed under the influence of Christian love. Before political activists began to kill it off fifty years ago, the public marketplace was crowded with elements of female love: kindness, pleasantness, trust, goodness, and mutual respect between the sexes. How did all that happen when all love emanates from the female heart except for some that originates with a closer study of Christ via a few thousand Christian pastors.

Until something else becomes evident, I credit women for having brought female values, standards, and expectations into the development and marketplace of American civilization. Men discovered the American West, but women civilized it. Without womanly influence and our constitutional system of government using Christian values to deal successfully with denominational differences, we would be another kind of nation today.

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2 Comments

Filed under Culture & Politics, Dear daughter, Her glory, marriage, Sociology 101

2 responses to “2827. Love is Never Enough — 07: More Macro Stuff

  1. 1jarofclay

    Wow!! ❤

  2. Briar Rose

    Sir Guy,

    My strong, handsome, smart husband recently let me down in the greatest way that I never could have imagined.

    Married blissfully for 2 years when Husband’s 18 year old daughter moved in with us 7 months ago. They had never lived together before. Understandably, their relationship was in dire need of work…

    Husband works 6 days a week, 16 hours a day. Step-daughter and I are alone all those days. Our first languages are different. I try my best in her language. I left my full time job to be able to drive her to and from school. I make sure she is clothed, fed, has entertainment, attend her medical appointments. I do her hair and makeup for special events, baked her a cake for her birthday. I take her on walks, to the movies, out for Starbucks.

    And yet even after all that time, mere politeness towards me was how I’d describe her interactions with me until about a month ago. No warmth or friendlyness developed. She began ignoring, passive aggressively refusing to assist me, staying locked away in her room, suddenly giving me commands. Things came to head: she felt ignored by her dad; he pays more attention to me.

    Recently commanded me again. I’ve always let it fly. This time I stood my ground and told her she can’t tell me what to do in my house. Insults against me were hurled: father loves her more, she was in his life first.

    Father returns home and she lied about something I said. I stated it was lie. Father comforted her when she protested: I know my baby, I know you’d never lie. More personal insults were hurled: I’m old, I’m a hypocrite,I play victim, father deserves a family but needs to find a better woman. I was told to shut up and a crude hand gesture was performed. All of this in fathers presence. He never spoke out on any of the above. He simply held her, wiped her tears while shutting me down anytime I tried to defend myself. When I protested that she claimed he loved her more than me, he stated to her that I was hurt by this because everyone takes things different ways.

    I’m devastated, disappointed, frustrated, sad, heartbroken. My family is very far away. I hopped on a plane 36 hours after the fight to escape. I spent those 36 hours curled up in my room crying.

    Husband called to tell me he talked to her. She said she’s spent her whole life mad at him and took it out on me. He says his guilt ruled him that day but to come home because he needs me to help him cope with the growing pains in their relationship.

    His daughter exploded on me and I feel his silence sent the message that he’s okay with her treatment of me in this manner. I feel as though he has no respect for me and our marriage. I feel that he took the path of least resistance rather standing strong as the head of a family on the path to harmony.

    My heart hurts terribly. I don’t know how to proceed. Please advise.

    Thank you.

    Your Highness Briar Rose,

    Regretable but well told story.

    You may still face further humiliation, but if you want to risk it, then set up conditions for your return. Here are some examples that you can either enforce and enjoy home again or you leave again.

    • He rules in your favor on all matters in the home or relationship except as you agree otherwise.

    • She helps keep house with some routine chores that you spell out. (Dad assign responsibility and you manage the working relationship.)

    • As soon as she’s able she finds her own place to live. (Dad to keep pressure on her.)

    • Let girl apologize for taking her mad out on you; see if she’ll admit it. (Dad suggest it.)

    Guy

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