Category Archives: boobs

2818. Well-liked Article (#82 updated from January 2008)

Theme: HardToGet Pays Off

Modern women bypass playing hardtoget. It works to stimulate and hold attention of the opposite sex, but women so corrupted the art that men stole it.

Our foremothers’ strategy forced men to devote time and effort just getting to know them. A man had to work to figure out what made her tick. It posed challenges instead of giveaways. Conquest took the back seat in his mind, because hardtoget forced it there.

It enabled her to dominate the pre-dating and dating phases. Her lack of eagerness made him eager, when she played it right. In the process he uncovered her attributes of value to him.

Hardtoget means to use disinterest and indirectly dominate any situation with a male of interest. One should keep plans and schedules personal. Show none and even hide eagerness. Don’t explain, don’t complain, don’t reveal intentions, don’t alibi, don’t offer excuses or reasons for doing or not doing something. She states flatly when and what she will and won’t do. Never why, never eager for his presence, and never without his putting forth considerable effort.

The strategy works, because people do not appreciate what they are given for little or no reason. But what they earn, they appreciate. Especially true of men.

Hardtoget challenges a man to pursue a gal and to explore what she is really like. Or else, it provides evidence that he’s not all that interested in her. The earlier she knows that, the better off she is.

The hard truth: Men now exploit this superior tactic, call it ‘vague and unavailable’, and women fall prey to the ingenuity of their own gender.


Filed under boobs, courtship, Dear daughter, How she wins, marriage

2806. Response to a Malcontent

The previous post, 2805, lists 20 mismanagement tendencies that cause marital breakups. To it, Godsgrace55 responds this way:

“All 20 of those behaviors also apply to men. But men think they don’t have to address their own behaviors. That is why you notice so many middle age and senior women without a wedding ring. Those women get fed up, divorce, and live a better quality of life.”

I respond as follows.


Dear Godsgrace55, you still don’t get it.

  1. Blaming men costs women whatever advantage they wish they had among men. (Blame may be well deserved, but it works contrary to what women intend.)
  2. Neither sex lives alone without the presence of the other in their lives. At the cultural level aimed at brightening the females’ future, women lead and men follow. At the societal level aimed at the present, men lead and women follow. It’s a swap-meet at which women have first choice for generating success for females, if they but focus on the future instead of getting their way in the present.
  3. In general and indirectly but not in particular and directly, women act and men react in response to the cultural values, standards, and expectations, and men drive society along those lines.
  4. This blog is What Women Never Hear, not what men never hear. Men don’t listen to men about how to handle or deal with women. If women don’t exemplify what they expect out of men, then men follow their competitive and often combative nature that women resent so easily.
  5. The sexes are born such that each individual seeks to get his or her way associating with others. It makes competition the most universal motivator. Except for sex before conquest, men have little or no use of women who compete with them. When women get their way all the time according to female expectations, men lose interest in providing/protecting, raising children, and staying with one woman.
  6. Women gain the superior edge in society by using morality, religion, pre-conquest sex, and marriage to tame and harness men to female expectations without emasculating them.
  7. Women do what’s right based on what they believe. Men do what’s right based on what they figure out will satisfy them the best. Blame cancels masculine interest for believing that women could be more right than he.
  8. When the dominant gender becomes mesmerized by feminine ability, aptitude, and astuteness, dominance dissolves beneath an canopy of female superiority.
  9. Et cetera, et cetera, et cetera….

Your last sentence is one-sided and exclusively blames men: “Those [middle age and senior without wedding ring] women get fed up, divorce, and live a better quality of life.”

To which I make it two-sided by inserting and bolding the blanks. “Those women get fed up because they can’t get husbands to change to meet wifely expectations, initiate divorce in order to save face and more realistically discredit him, and live a better quality of life by demeaning him, by calling single life high quality to cover her disappointment or embarrassment, and to hide her disenchantment of life without her man.”

Summarized, modern women continue to lose the ability to get what they want out of men. Blame, demand, and political pressure get results, but not what women wish they had from about middle age onward.


Filed under boobs, courtship, Culture & Politics, Dear daughter, feminine, Her glory, marriage, sex differences, The mind

Blog 2802. Women Cause Porn to Grow

Big Picture. We are in midst of a growing trend of women less able to find, capture, and keep a man. The epidemic grows. Hotties fade into has-beens. Crazies become the new standard. Wives join the crowd outside the home either as dumpees or fattened-up copycats with husbands too porn-habituated to leave their wives. The porn industry and lesbian and gay communities grow as the result.

Little Picture. I cut the subject short.

  • Unable to keep a man, wives and gals are either turning or remaining single and alone for life. Pleading equality or other alibi disrespectful of men, women overeat much as men do and expect their future together to remain as they matched up when women were more trim. It’s a complex picture of causes and effects that women ignore at their misery.
  • Their sex drives differ. Men are sexually motivated by their imagination. Promise lures them. Curiosity energizes them. Imagination motivates them to get moving. Touching and fondling spurs arousal. With intercourse a man seeks to establish dominance and confirm his ability. He seeks to satisfy himself either as conqueror or partner. That’s his sex act, his nature in action.
  • Husbands continue through life expecting to live with the same gal they vowed to live with forever. Each satisfies himself that his choice has most of what he expects. That is, attractiveness to his eyes, mutual excitement from his touch, pleasing voice, pleasant scent, great kisses, and all wrapped into the trim sheath of a supportive partner who makes him feel good about himself. (Trim, as opposed to thin, in that some fat may be present when he proposes. It’s the future expansion of her body, if nothing else upstages it, that breaks the connection with husband.)
  • Her sex drive does not depend on how he looks or feels. It operates in response to how he treats and handles her. Consquently, husbands grow fat after marriage without the effect that she produces with her excess fat, and wives plead for equality to alibi for overeating. OTOH, his sex drive is energized by how she looks and feels; his imagination is the all-powerful motivator behind her appeal and his interest and drive.
  • A causal connection exists between excess fat on the female body and men retreating to porn for sexual stimulation. Fat-caused physical attractiveness deteriorates but it’s secondary. The primary motivator is the discouraging absence of exciting touching, fondling, and arousing stimulation. Touching/fondling holds a man’s interest, stirs his curiosity, and awakens his imagination. If wife’s fat is excess to what husband can tolerate, porn works as substitute for sex habits made suitable by blaming her for lack of self-respect to care better for herself.
  • I expect women have fun in overeating in disregard for what men think, because one root of female behavior is now unwisely based on feminist disrespect of men. However, feminist-think ignores the male nature in hopes of changing it. Men do not respect women who don’t respect themselves; overeating is out of character, disrespectful, and self-defeating for females—as men see it.
  • Men can’t love a woman they can’t respect. Therefore, excess fat prevents a woman being both respected and loved.  

Thus, women directly drive men toward porn by taking away the excitement of men touching, fondling, and activating their arousal with the female body. Indirectly, men lose respect and love from the lack of self-respect in excessively fat women.


Filed under boobs, courtship, Dear daughter, feminine, Fickle female, How she loses, marriage, sex differences

2792. Wifely Leadership — 02: Her First Hurdle

NOTE: In the last post I said your puzzlement will clear beginning with next post, namely this one. However, it’s not to be, the clearer air I intended is delayed another day.


Whatever a man believes is the starting point for his wife to indirectly exert her influence; aka wifely leadership. However, she can’t change him. She has to uncover new ways for him to think, accept, and value differently a multitude of problematic matters. She does it best when she anticipates what’s coming and influences him beforehand. She gets his buy-in to either her way or negotiated settlements aimed at avoiding damage from what she foresees coming down the marital pike. Her first hurdle, however, originates in the male nature.

Marriage has a surprise beginning. Women don’t recognize how to turn these mysterious factors to their advantage. When a man proposes marriage, the male nature imports five hidden concepts about which much is subliminal.

  1. Whatever it is, he believes his love is sufficient. Conquest proved that he owns her. Unless fully devoted to her beyond the normal, he acts no differently to please her requests for more attention, affection, support, etc.
  2. He believes her expressions of love will signal her satisfaction with him and continually confirm her likeability and loyalty to him.
  3. He believes his love of her is genuine as she is now, and he expects her not to change. His nature doesn’t allow him to love a woman different from the original without assessing her according to the seven conditions of masculine love: his respect of her, his devotion, her likeability, her loyalty, his likeability to her, his loyalty to her, and his conclusion that he loves her truly.
  4. He believes married life for him will be the continuation of his single life (but she expects him to change and he won’t). He meets his marital obligations to the extent his devotion to her keeps him satisfied with himself.
  5. His nature avoids doing anything at which he expects to fail. So, if he isn’t fully responsible for their marriage, he believes he’s not sufficiently in charge to prevent failure. Challenging his sense of full responsibility weakens his sense of duty, which discourages his motivational force to do what’s right for her.

When we do what we believe, we do what is right—for us at that moment. Wives can’t get their man to change. They can only influence his thinking—and do it indirectly and patiently—to look at life’s problems before they happen. Living primarily in the future more than the present, it’s a piece of cake for the future-oriented, planning-capable, well-intentioned wife dedicated to keeping husband responsible for marital success, aka no separation.

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Filed under boobs, courtship, Dear daughter, feminine, Her glory, How she wins, marriage, sex differences

2787. Screen Him and His Mother Together

If following her nature, a woman wants a good man as she defines good. In today’s social and domestic marketplaces, both a clear definition and good men are absent. According to women, that is. Men will argue the contrary all day long, but they neither make it clear nor right.

An old maxim says, he will treat you like he treats his mother. Keep that thought in mind, as I think you should spend more time in the company of your dates and their mothers together and even separately if your man is not available.

On her turf, his turf, and even your turf, check out how treats her. Then take it to the next level. Analyze specifics such as these examples:

  • Does he listen attentively to her? What techniques does she use to capture and hold his attention?
  • Does she wait at doors for his opening of them? Hold the car door? How else does she show her respect of him?
  • Is his respect of her so sincere that it would happen even if you were not present?
  • Is she satisfied with both herself and him? Does he read and accept her satisfaction in him?
  • Does she seek to impress him or for him to impress her?
  • Does she avoid whiny and complaining chatter? She fair minded as opposed to seeking equality in all that she manages?
  • Does he help her with big things? Or just little things? How does she solicit his help, or just wait for him to detect her need and then act?
  • Does the good order of her house convince you she had high standards and expectations when he was growing up?
  • How much of her childhood influence remains in his adult character? Do you see it when alone with him?

A good movie shows off a mother who does most things right, if you measure her effort by her sons’ resounding goodness. I recommend Gifted Hands, which was made from Ben Carson’s autobiography. Tough moms harden boys into pleasing mom forever, which makes them good men.

Now, ladies, you are much more skilled than I about reading people and situations. My examples above are intended to get you started. There’s a lot more you can discover in the relationship of boyfriend and his mother.

I’m trying to foster this point in your thinking, your man is as good as his mother shaped him in childhood. Some remnants of her effort should be visible when they are together.

If mother didn’t teach him well, he ‘filled out’ his childhood by adapting his character, values, standards, and expectations according to teen peers. He’s no better than his fellow adultolescents. The early and not late childhood foretells a man will qualify as good for a girlfriend aimed at becoming his prospective wife.

The measuring stick that will help serve you is time spent in the company of boyfriend and his mother. If he does propose, you have a good feeling that he will treat you good. Befriend your future mother-in-law, and you’ll earn her help rather than no help or even disdain.


Filed under boobs, courtship, Dear daughter, feminine, Fickle female, Home CEO, marriage, nurturing, Uncategorized

2786. Well-liked Article (#59 posted in January 2008)

Even when sex is not cheap, a man ponders that other women look better than his present sex partner. As a skillful and successful hunter-conqueror, he could do better the next time. A woman’s challenge is to make him forget the ‘do better’ and ‘next time’ parts.

Keeping him with her requires she outshine other women. She has a huge repertoire of female strengths to rely on. Each earns another bit of a man’s respect, and, remember, a man’s love is based on respect for the female gender and one or more women in particular.

Women have many natural strengths, but few are willing to bypass their ego. Some don’t like their man well enough. Anyway, the woman hopeful of keeping her man focuses on and fine tunes the following ‘jewels’ that make a woman shine in her man’s eyes.

♥ Physical attractiveness marvelously enhanced by affordable attire and classy grooming.

♥ Sexual attractiveness enhanced by modest coverings to reinforce that other men are forbidden.

♥ Gentleness provided out of patience.

♥ Forgetfulness that follows forgiveness.

♥ Thoughtfulness that her mate deserves even when he doesn’t.

♥ Gratefulness for her man that shines as her being happy when he’s around.

♥ Submissiveness as her spirit of cooperation.

♥ Happiness that spreads infectiously.

♥ Joyfulness that inspires greater hope.

♥ Chasteness promised to him by modest display of boobs and legs.

♥ Generousness that smashes selfishness out of their lives.

♥ Delightfulness that makes him smile.

♥ Unselfishness that spreads as example for all.

♥ Neatness that inspires others.

♥ Goodness that sets a shining example.

♥ Faithfulness that inspires him to follow suit.

♥ Countenance of perpetual smile inside if not evident outside.

These are every woman’s strengths, but most women are too busy, ego-stricken, or politically propagandized to use them all. NOTE: Of course her man may not be worth her traits as shown above, but it’s those jewels that inspire him to become her Mr. Right a couple of decades after they marry.


Filed under boobs, courtship, feminine, Her glory, marriage

2784. Well-liked Article (#51 posted in January 2008)

Regardless of her sexual history, virtual virginity is the strategy of acting virginal sufficiently close enough that it enables a woman to uncover what a man is really after—conquest, conquer and dump, frequent and convenient sex, or her above all else.

Virtual virginity means to the Dating Man either (1) he’s not good enough for her, (2) he’s not good enough yet, or (3) she has religious, moral, or other reasons for not yielding. All three reasons present challenges to draw him back to her. If he’s just after sex instead of her, he’ll find a way to dump her shortly.

Thus, a virtual virgin produces dump-before-sex, which is better than dump-after-sex for four reasons: (a) She wins by making ineffective his camouflaged, disingenuous, and perhaps dishonest motivation. (b) She won’t have him lingering in her closet of forgotten sex partners who were never worth her anyway. (c) She can slam him into the ‘Thank God’ corner of her memory bank. (d) She doesn’t have to explain him to a future husband.

Provided he’s after her instead of just conquest, a virtual virgin forces him to more patiently look for her weaknesses that might enable conquest. In the process, over time, he learns by absorption about her strengths, qualities, and potential for wifehood. What he admires is a virtue and men seek to marry a virtuous woman. So, the longer he looks for weaknesses, the more he sees of her and her accumulating virtues. Her magnetism grows as he fails to get what he wants.

Once she yields, however, he quits looking for weaknesses. Consequently, he fails to recognize and learn to appreciate more of her non-sexual assets. That is, after conquest, he quits looking so hard at what all she has to offer him.

Virtual virginity makes a female unique and highly worthy of pursuit. Conquest makes him the competitive superior to other men, and the greater her perceived worth as chaste, the more eagerly he bends to her expectations—provided his pursuit is hampered by her refusals for a lengthy time. That is, she adds value to herself by being more insistent about dedicating herself to something or someone higher than she. (To save herself for husband weakens hope and scares off present dates; to save herself for another man opens more doors for him to argue her down off her pedestal.)

Feminists claim men should not be that way, and they try politically to change the male nature. Male behavior changes long enough to conquer another woman, but masculinity eventually trumps both politics and female wishful thinking. Individual women pay the price by losing a man they hope to keep or find out more about him.

A man’s natural pursuit of other females does not stop until one woman so captures his respect and captivates his imagination that he devotes himself to her alone. Virtual virginity provides the best strategy for winning this battle of the sexes.

All the above begs the question about acting virginal after a previous marriage. Not to worry. It’s not the virginal condition that holds a man’s interest, it’s how many guys got there before him that turns a man off? Who were they? Will I meet them someday and not know about it? It’s not the vagina that wears out. A large number of lovers wear her out for staying with just one. Thus, a previous marriage is usually no issue.


Filed under boobs, courtship, feminine, Her glory, How she wins, marriage, sex differences