Category Archives: Dear daughter

2574. More Tips for Women — 08

  1. Wives who exemplify mystery, modesty, feminine expertise, and Christian morality know how to smooth out husbandly domination, discourage aggression, and prevent violence. It carries over easily to children on wings of her leadership by example.
  2. Sex does not keep a man. Wives have to provide more to enhance life together and compensate their man for loss of his independence. Inborn relationship skills empower wives to succeed.
  3. Wives who endlessly complain, find fault, and impose guilt on husband are unlikeable, which is a major ingredient of a man’s bonded love. Even if he agrees that she is right, he nevertheless seeks an easier life elsewhere. He will change for another woman, but not one who continually blames him.
  4. Women are partially ignorant about men and much of what they know is wrong. Consequently, a woman’s relationship expertise doesn’t always work. She betters herself and techniques by learning more about the male nature.
  5. Women are the relationship experts. Men go along and expect a smooth and maintenance-free ride. To men, a relationship just is; no need of maintenance.
  6. Women fear abandonment. Men fear insignificance. By promoting their man’s significance, women reduce their fear. It also enhances compatibility.
  7. Women generate unhappiness by focusing negatively on their man’s shortcomings, which worsen precisely because of endless attention. Her being ‘happy’ and fault-finding her man are mutually exclusive. Citing his faults and motivating him to improve are also mutually exclusive.
  8. Women have one mission, to live well and have a good life for them and theirs. They work endlessly to make the tomorrows better and their future brighter.
  9. Each woman qualifies her man for marriage, conditions him to accept her values and standards, but shouldn’t try to change him after their first sex together.
  10. Mother doesn’t respect her son as a self-developer. She dictates that a husband is obligated to satisfy females for whom he is responsible and other things of which he’s too young to understand. Thus, mothers shape the character of boys to be poor husbands.

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2572. More Tips for Women — 06

  1. ‘Full disclosure’ by a woman is foolish. She will be judged, so less information is better. Her intention to be ‘fully known’ works against her; his curiosity is uninspired.
  2. A man changes dramatically after conquering a woman. He inherits the conqueror’s right to manage their sexual agenda, or he is free to dump her.
  3. A man’s respect for a woman is essential for his love. Among women, love can come before respect.
  4. A woman seeks family, economic, social, and domestic stability. She seeks safety of health, life, and family—that is, a brighter future.
  5. As more and more women take up bedpost notching, they generate disrespect for selves and gender. Raunchy and feminine are mutually exclusive.
  6. Booty call is the screwing she gets for the screwing he got. Duty sluts have lost more male respect that they can ever imagine or recover with him.
  7. By girls insisting on and upholding feminine, social, and domestic standards, boys learn they must please females for no other purpose than it is right.
  8. By planning to treat and qualify all men alike, a woman conditions her thinking to not go off the deep end with infatuation.
  9. By their nature, women favor equality for decision making. Men favor fairness. Resolve it early or arguments compound and bitterness follows.
  10. Unless she is unattractive to a man, the thought of his conquest never ends. It’s why platonic friendships between the sexes are unstable. He can’t conquer his nature; he’s born that way.


Filed under courtship, Dear daughter, Fickle female, raunch, sex differences, The mind

Blog 2569. More Tips for Women — 04

  • Women can best tolerate a man’s dominance, keep him, and restrain his promiscuous urges by working from the only playbook that puts women directly in charge of both social and domestic arenas—No Sex without Marriage.
  • The more diligently that females show respect and gratitude for males generally, the more likely each woman shows respect and gratefulness for her man.
  • The aggressive male nature requires taming. Mothers nurture boys into adolescents that respect women. Chaste girls civilize boys into men that expect to honor the dreams of women. Wives energize husbands to respect family, responsibilities, and relationships.
  • Wives’ number one complaint is that their husband does not show enough affection. Showing affection is unnatural for men. They have to be taught and best done in childhood. Affection is not a natural output of masculine love.
  • When words are enough to conquer, men offer little else.
  • Women either set and exemplify civilizing and domesticating values in all their relationships, or men impose masculine hubris on female sensibilities.
  • Feminism sours male devotion for one female, weakens family responsibility, discourages his showing affection, and curdles masculine incentives for honoring female dreams.
  • Feminists begrudge the male ego, but the process devalues females in male eyes more than it hurts men in female eyes.
  • Feminists change the culture by imposing political objectives outside the home, e.g., political correctness. Men take it personal and home life withers as wives are subliminally blamed. (Men angry at women generally don’t make very good mates.)
  • Feminists ridicule and devalue virginity. This dampens manly ego-stroking, belittles the masculine sense of conquest, and reduces the worth of females generally.

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2568. More Tips for Women — 03

The following are some results from the way the sexes are born differently. It describes the need of why women are born with so much relationship expertise that men lack. Women are especially endowed with the ability to overcome how two natures work contrary to each other.

  1. A woman’s love connects her to a man, but the reverse is not true. Her love is an unearned gift to him, and men don’t appreciate unearned gifts. It does not follow that not appreciating her love is not appreciating her. He measures his appreciation of her in a mixture of other ways that earn and retain his respect.


  1. Women, loaded with self-love and ardent desire to spread it, instinctively rely on three little words to fix all that is broke. Men are not born with self-love and earn it as they develop, and so womanly love has a lesser importance.


  1. Women are not born with self-respect; they earn it as they develop. OTOH, men are born loaded with self-respect. Their dealings with women are primarily based on respect and expectations that they be automatically respected with whatever love a woman wants to give them.


  1. Her respect of who and what he is impresses him more than her confessing her love. He measures her love by her actions much more than her words.


  1. Expressions of female love can become overbearing when over expressed. It may signal that she is desperate, fearful, depressed, and generally not in charge of her life. She can even be boring with too many  ‘I love you’s if his interest in her personally is very low.


  1. A man prefers to figure out that a woman loves him by her actions to support and depend on him, by her letting him run their relationship habits, by her accepting his leadership/dominant role. Her words are never as impressive as her actions. Whether she loves him at conquest is immaterial; either way is okay so long as she yields.


  1. It’s man-think. The more she relies on his leadership, the more love she must have for him. Pardon the hyperbole, but her willingness to obey signifies her love. He is primarily interested in her love/obedience at the present moment; he doesn’t worry about how it impacts their future. Now is forever. If she loves him enough to obey now, he owns their future, or so men usually think. The pressure to obey inspires women to learn how to outwit, outsmart, and outmaneuver men.


  1. It’s the existence of her love and not the expressions of it that a man depends on. She loves me, so let’s move on. Her expressions of love please her more than him.


9. Given a quiet or concerned moment, she says I love you. It was unnecessary, so why did she say it? What does she expect him to do? What can he do but respond with the same, which is a confirmation that she desires, but he does not understand the need—unless she previously taught him.


As the result of being born differently, on matters of love she is single minded, but he is not. She relies on the use of words to convey her thoughts and what she expects of him. He focuses on actions from which he figures out where he stands and what he can expect from her.

As individuals develop throughout life, they learn to adjust to make all those conditions shown above become more advantageous for themselves. Women learn much more easily than men, because of their relationship expertise to compensate for inborn traits.

Their natures are very different and contrary to the other. Since women are blessed with special abilities for dealing with men, it is up them to relieve, reverse, or overcome the willfulness of both sides to get their own way. Men don’t know where to start; they pretty much fill their roles as described above.



Filed under courtship, Dear daughter, marriage, sex differences

2566. More Tips for Women — 01

  1. As single women take up, permit, and enjoy sex for its own sake, men bypass learning and respecting other things of importance to females.
  2. In our world today where sex comes before marriage, men look at attractive women as sex targets until conquered and as keeper, backup, booty, duty slut, or throw-away after conquest. The longer before conquest, the more likely she’s a keeper.
  3. The more the female gender provides unmarried sex, the easier for each individual woman to miss out as a keeper. The fewer the unmarried givers, the easier to become a keeper.
  4. Men need no lessons for ‘wham, bam, thank you, mam’. It comes quite natural. Only women can defeat the urge that easily becomes habit.
  5. Men learn how to treat a woman differently by her and other women rejecting them for sex. Thus, men learn to greatly respect the female gender.
  6. Morality serves women, but male dominance operates very well without it; men don’t need it except when sensing responsibility to win a woman. Mothers and other females carry the burden to see to it that boys and men live within the moral expectations of women.
  7. Mothers civilize and domesticate boys. Chaste girls tame and teach testosterone terrors to honor female standards and expectations. Grateful wives finish the process of making good husbands. Or else men disappoint the female gender.
  8. The more that women trash-talk masculine characteristics, the less men honor female sensibilities.
  9. The female nature strives to live up to something bigger such as God, their man, their children. Men have to learn to live that way, which puts teaching in the hands of women who can capture and hold the attention of each man.
  10. The less respect that women show the male gender, the more men become irresponsible for helping fulfill female dreams for home and family.


Filed under courtship, Dear daughter, marriage, sex difference

2565. Default Motivations

Default motivations are those that reside in the psyche from birth and to which people turn when they lack other motivations. It is their nature in action.

Their natural and deep-rooted motivations differ, and a man’s is the simpler process. His prime motivator is to satisfy his sense of self-admiration, which he does through accomplishments. It’s a natural closed loop. 1) He seeks to admire self. 2) He accomplishes something—task, job, or R&R and being free to do so is itself satisfying—until his efforts satisfy him. 3) Satisfaction confirms self-admiration. He is free to energize himself to go around the loop many times daily. Moreover, he is self-sufficient. He can continually loop around the process without the help of others, unless he solicits it. The admiration of others may be appreciated but in the end it is unnecessary; he is independent at earning self-admiration (except boys are sometimes taught otherwise).

OTOH, her prime motivator is to confirm her sense of self-importance, which she does by doing something for others, spreading her love, and finding gratefulness in others. The last is the most productive, because feedback from gratitude she spreads confirms her importance and enough self-importance generates happiness. Her process is also a closed loop. But it always involves others, which adds to the complexity. She needs to prove her importance. 1) She finds reasons to be grateful for herself and others. 2) She spreads her love to confirm it. 3) Recipients express their gratitude by confirming her importance in their lives. Her self-importance thus confirmed, she returns to step 1).

A major theme of this blog is that the closer people act according to their nature inherited at birth, the more compatible they are as mates, happier as women, and more satisfied as men.



Filed under courtship, Dear daughter, feminine, marriage, sex differences, The mind

2563. Her Receptivity Problem

At post 2427 six months ago, Shermy cited a female problem and Prettybeans asked for an article on the subject. Shermy called it a receptivity problem. I replied then that I was unqualified but would try to figure some way to help. Overdue but here it is.

Shermy: “Today’s woman has become very skilled at doing everything for herself, then realizes no one is willing to help someone who rejects when something is offered. Pretty soon NOTHING is offered, then you’re left wondering why you have to do EVERYTHING yourself.”

As with most female problems dealing with men, the receptivity problem is caused by abandoning the feminine nature that women inherit at birth.

  1. Vanity is vital to complete the female nature. It makes you feel deserving of what others want to do for you and less motivated to refuse them. Vanity inside adds to self-importance and attractiveness, which makes men seek to please you. .
  2. A man wants to figure out the opportunity and potential promise you hold for him. He judges by your reactions to what he has to offer. Rejections of whatever kind tell him he isn’t and probably can’t be all that important and, therefore, you could never be dependent on him, which translates to his not being attractive enough. His view of a future with you dims, and so he looks for gals more promising.
  3. Manly character and integrity serve women, but you have to mine it out of individual men. The best way is to show willingness, confirm opportunity, and offer promise of both listening and depending on him. It has the added advantage of enabling you to figure out his character and integrity.
  4. You may feel good but you devalue your importance by talking about yourself. A guy tires easily of it, and withdraws from wanting to please you. Men talk to admire and satisfy themselves, which adds to their desire to do something for or please you. They know already they’re important, and as they talk and please you more, confirmation grows of your expanding importance to them.
  5. Your worth to others depends on your ability to add importance to women and satisfaction to men. When you let or enable men to do something for you or to please you, they easily become satisfied as having done the right thing. Men don’t invest themselves for a woman without a return on investment, which is that you should think more of them than previously. A satisfying ROI. Consequently, if you have the receptivity problem Shermy described, you reduce your value to men for not helping them feel satisfied and better about themselves.
  6. Men know that the weaker sex deserves special treatment, which adds value to you, because you are an opportunity to show off his ability, virility, and stronger role in the universe. Refuse any respectable attention from a man and you belittle yourself and your gender. Hits are next.
  7. You have two forms of attractiveness, physical and sexual. The more you tout the latter, the less attention is shown to you as a woman. The more you refuse sexual attention, pleasantly convert it to the non-sexual without rejecting the man, then the more respect you earn by shifting his focus from sex and onto you.
  8. You’re as pretty as you convince yourself each morning before your favorite mirror. Your prettiness doubles when you pleasantly let a man ‘rescue’ you from thinking you can do everything by yourself. You can do it, but it doesn’t pay as well.
  9. Men like their independence, when they can find a doll who shines as dependent on them. An independent woman may look good but to male eyes she has a phony sheen about her.
  10. Female happiness is rooted in self-gratitude. Women ungrateful for who and what they are have trouble both finding happiness and accepting manly offers or assistance. However, accepting the support of others adds value to her. She must be better than she thinks, or they wouldn’t single her out to help. Therefore, by more willingly accepting male offers, she becomes more grateful for herself, which enables her to expand her gratitude for others and be released onto the road to female happiness.

It’s not what you do and don’t do, it’s the reaction of the guy you deal with. When you refuse his respectable initiatives, you satisfy yourself to your own disadvantage. When you pleasantly accept manly initiatives, your advantages multiply.

It is to the huge advantage of the superior gender that all women make all men feel better about themselves. A man’s self-admiration and satisfaction comes better from acceptance of his offer or gift rather than a guilt-caused compliment or thank you that comes with a turn down, refusal, rejection.


Filed under courtship, Dear daughter, feminine, Fickle female, How she wins, marriage, sex differences, The mind