Category Archives: Dear daughter

2216. Compatibility Axioms #771-780


771. Men are on a mission to deliver their form of temporary love with a prepackaged agenda. Virtual virginity forces him to repackage himself with consideration for other things such as her virtues, character, and personal preferences. The process that accompanies delayed sex leads to commitment and his actions in appreciation of her likeability leads to devotion. (See the series titled Virtual Virginity for ways to deter or slow him down.) [266]

772. Women can talk about it—to other women, that is. But, talking to their man about his sexual expertise requires more caution and indirectness than that used in international diplomacy and negotiation, where phrases can sometimes have double, different, or even opposite meanings. [266]

773. It takes a lot of time and desire for a man to figure her out mentally and emotionally. He’s preoccupied with figuring her out physically. And vice versa, he keeps those things separated in his mind.[266]

774. Competition in a married couple’s decision making generates incompatible emotions. It worsens like an untreated infection and stirs his dominant nature. Competition stimulates thoughts about her as dispensable; her likeability declines. [267]

775. Cooperation breeds compatibility and demonstrates to him that he’s indispensable. As men become more indispensable, they grow in steadfastness and devotion to whatever they are doing. Cooperation works more like exercise to strengthen his habits than her apathy which weakens his dedication. [267]

776. She determines whether competition or cooperation prevails in their home. By competing less and cooperating more, she capitalizes on their opposed but compatible natures. It improves her chances of moving him toward indispensability and keeperhood. [267]

777. Persistently rejecting boys’ offers for first-time sex teaches girls to ‘read’ and evaluate things more important than looks and love—i.e., his conscience, values, attitudes, and true interest in her. [269]

778. Ignore or pardon red flag character traits to enter a relationship, and girls enter an unknown world without map and compass. [269]

779. By age 21 she should score 100% on this test: Distinguish a man’s devotion for her as a unique woman from another man’s commitment to join her for a close relationship. [269]

780. Virtue makes a person shine relative to others. Conscience is virtue honored by strength of character. Virtuous character outshines physical attractiveness over a long marriage.  [269]

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2215. Compatibility Axioms #761-770


761. Hunter-conquerors appreciate tantalizing, challenging, and hard-to-capture prey. It motivates men to investigate a woman intensively instead of just for sex, but only as long as she refuses to yield the first time. [265]

762. Modern women fall prey to the feminist idea that patriarchy is conquerable by cheap and easy sex.* Men now exploit to their advantage the superior tactic developed by women, that of being hard to get aka vague and unavailable. *Actually sex compensates men to keep them acquiescent for all the disrespectful treatment they receive based on feminist values now embedded deeply in the culture. [265]

763. When women sour on their marriage, they turn against men. When men sour on their marriage, they turn against marriage. [265]

764. What makes sex cheap? The same thing that makes anything cheap—oversupply. Women are more in charge of their destiny when they make a man ‘purchase’ exclusive rights through marriage. [265]

765. Postmodern thinking has young women mimicking teen boys; e.g., in the company of men they cheer strippers on to raunchier exhibitions. (See Female Chauvinist Pigs by Ariel Levy) [265]

766. Their nature and interest differ markedly on this subject. He’s made one way, she’s made another. She wants them to be more alike, he wants them to just get on with it.

767. Women nurture, men lead. Women want to be nurtured intimately in their sex life, but men don’t do intimacy all that well. It makes them feel feminized, wussified. They’re conquestidors, not nurturers. (Doesn’t mean they can’t be conditioned to more effectively please their woman her way.)

768. Her needs for attention and affection are minor compared to his need for acceptance as sex partner—that is, if she’s to be a keeper.

769. His primal motivations are conqueror’s role before and conqueror’s rights after their first sex together. Conquest itself must have pleased her, or she would not have yielded. So, why should anything else be needed?

770. Male sensitivity about his sexual prowess exceeds female willingness to complain. Women intuitively know this. So, they complain to sister females rather than to their man.

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2214. Compatibility Axioms #751-760


751. It’s self-fulfilling: A wife blames husband for his faults. Accused men resist change and defend themselves by disproving the evidence presented. In her eyes, his resistance makes her see his faults as her failure to correct him. More of her failures make his faults even less tolerable to her. [259]

752. Short-term romantic love seduces women into ignoring the need for her man’s respect. Hence, when romantic love fades in a year or two, his respect for her is not enough to fuel long-term enduring love.[259]

753. She seeks to be friends with her kids and elevates them to adult status. It demotes husband to subordinate status, which he views as denial of admiration, tampering with his significance and, therefore, insufferable. [260]

754. A woman has to sell a man on fidelity, marriage, and her worth as comfort partner. Otherwise, men focus on frequent and convenient sex as comfort from their daily ‘battles’ — and it may not be her. [260]

755. She welcomes kids with open arms but not him. She takes his arrival home for granted, because she wants relief with the kids. [260]

756. Hook up but no call? She lost her footing playing in a man’s territory. [260]

757. Couples try to make their life together fair or equal, but it’s self-defeating. It puts them to competing and women usually lose in the long run. Equal is never possible and fair depends on who defines it. [260]

758. Budgeting comes easily if a couple focuses on building a successful mixture of spousal interaction. Lots of imagination, small bits of will power, negotiable cooperation, and frequent confirmation of mutual trust can all be energized through the budgeting process. [261]

759. Forgive yourself and each other. Ignore what’s past. Presume financial decisions already made were sound at the time even if you fought over them. Else, you would not have made them. Someone won and all is done. Hindsight sees too many mistakes; those little buggers trigger spousal disputes. Why pay attention to what can haunt, irritate, and demotivate you or generate distrust for spouse or your budgeting process? [261]

760. Pay yourself first: Save at least 10% off the top for long term savings for home purchase and retirement. Otherwise, late in life you will financially stagger before you physically limp. Life is best the other way around.  [261]

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Blog 2213 — Garden of Eden: Three Roots


Rooted who knows how far back in human history, men and women are born 1) willing and able to be compatible as mates, 2) with a dominant gender to drive the bus and a superior gender to indirectly guide the driver, and 3) with men enabled men to find satisfaction and women to pursue happiness.

1) Two Loves. The glue of compatibility starts with two very different forms of love that have to be bonded into an agreeable form, which is unattainable except under management of a relationship expert.

Her Love. Women expect to keep their mate by demonstrating their love with words and actions; it’s energized by their nature of loving to love someone. In return she expects him to display all manner of loving attention as she defines love—most prominently as displays of affection—which she transmutes into her importance in life.

His Love. Men expect to keep their mate through his loyalty to her and her likeability to him. In return he expects her to display actions—much more than words—that he interprets as her loyalty to him and his likeability to her.

IOW, he expects to receive the reverse of what he gives. She expects the same as what she gives. They differ fundamentally, which is why the glue of compatibility requires a relationship expert to get it to bond.

2) Superior Sex vs. Dominant Sex. On the macro scale of human behavior, we see a superior sex and irresistible force versus a dominant sex and immovable object. However, God designs the genders such that the immovable becomes moveable with irresistible female leveraging of sexual availability. That is, men do whatever women require in order for men to have frequent and convenient access to sex.

On the other hand, the irresistible female force becomes resistible under the influence of masculine strength to get what men want. Women do whatever men require in order for women to enjoy the fruits of manly producing, providing, protecting, and problem solving on behalf of women and children.

It’s a swap meet. Irresistible and immovable both yield voluntarily to reciprocal loyalty and likeability when surrounded by affirmation, accommodation, and affection. Consequently, their competing powers balance and cooperate to form compatibly successful relationships under management of relationship experts.

3) Two Opposites. Much unwarranted marital turmoil arises from this sex difference.

Her Happiness. Women are born to be happy but they have to earn it. She does it by making herself important to others, which returns to magnify her sense of self-importance and self-gratitude, which enables her to find more ways to be important and grateful, which is her main pathway to happiness. The more grateful she is, the happier she is.

His Satisfaction. Men are born to be satisfied but they have to earn it. Unfortunately as women see it, men earn satisfaction at their work. Hence, daily parking of himself after work with TV, beer, and clicker while she continues working till bedtime in order to keep herself feeling important and grateful.

You can see evidence daily of how Feminism, politics, and pop culture combine to rip the heart from those three ancient roots of human behavior. 1) Men are never affectionate enough for women. Women purposely make themselves unlikeable to men by getting in their man’s face arguing to get their way. 2) Women give away sexual favors, which removes the primary incentive that causes men to provide and protect a woman and her children. 3) Women are overworked because men do nothing after their workday ends and all the associated ‘crimes’ that flow from that concept of the female being thus victimized.

Oh, well, that’s enough complaining. We still have the historic background for compatibility for couples, counterbalancing gender powers, satisfaction for men, and happiness for women. The roots linger in the hearts of many women, but so few are standing up for it out of fear of feminist condemnation.

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2212. Hits: Let’s Quit


On further review, the material I have left on hits is redundant. So, I won’t bore you with it.

However, an informative replacement read. The following was referred to me by Lauren, the main participant in the series “WWNH: Real World,” to whom I’m grateful.

All women, especially wives, may benefit from it. If not for their present relationship, they may better understand what many divorced men more than likely went through.

The author takes her own giant leap out of the feminist cauldron that breeds disrespect of husbands. http://www.thefederalistpapers.org/us/woman-realizes-that-shes-been-accidentally-abusing-her-husband-this-whole-time

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2211. Hits: Graciousness Wins Respect


Females are both complimented and blessed when men hit on them.

Your physical attractiveness is complimented by his motivation to hit on you rather than someone else. So, what does ‘blessed’ mean in this context? Each hit is a perfect opportunity to promote who and what you are to both yourself and others. Specifically, to earn more respect from other people and thus promote your agenda with more of their goodwill.

More importantly, it provides opportunity to embellish the respect of others for you as person, woman, and your other roles in life. Example: Dignity adds respect to persons. Standing up to stronger sex adds respect to weaker sex. You earn both self-respect and respect of others by assertively (not aggressively) defending your social status, standing, and preferences (married, independent, picky about associates, discreet about sexual matters, sensitive against pushiness, prejudiced against men who don’t know uninvited hit from pleasant approach).

Being a pushover to men on almost any matter is to lose respect or opportunity to gain more. You won’t like this, but saying “I love you” so early in the relationship game and so often before marriage suggests you’re a pushover. Eat those words, make him earn them. Expressing your feelings makes you feel good, of course, but in the long run respect is more important to keep a relationship going.

Relative to men, women can’t have too much respect. It’s the counterbalance to male dominance. That’s why feminine mystery, female modesty, self-centered vanity, and insistent monogamy work so well. Indirectly, those traits let a woman stand up inside and politely strengthen her will against a man’s will. Being so indirect, she doesn’t push any buttons that might offend him. To him, that’s just the way she is—shrouded in mystery, modest to a fault, vain beyond belief, faithful unnecessarily. When those traits are developed and improved at the mirror, she more easily earns additional respect, which means better foundation for a guy’s love.

Did you get that point? Mirror time leads to better love by some man.

You deserve to be blessed but you have to earn it in today’s social scene. As already proposed in earlier posts, a mighty breakthrough awaits you ladies who fear or resent hits especially from ‘undesirables’. It’s a garden path walk into much greater respect for you as person, woman, and all those other things that you are and do. In effect graciousness dealing with ‘undesirables’ (for your life) sells you as highly respectable person. Observers note that they also deserve at least your graciousness, which is an indirect compliment to them, which adds to their respect of you.

I know you neither want to be told how to handle hitters or to change to something you view as fearful or too difficult for your spirit as woman. But you can’t enjoy more of life’s potential advantages unless you change your game plan.

Consequently, its more reason you ladies should welcome all hits and should teach yourselves to gain all the benefits available.

Reminder: Welcome every hit and treat every hitter exactly the same. Hottie, undesirable, or weirdo, exactly the same. In the face of tough times of what to do next, especially those times that discombobulate most people, a woman’s graciousness shines brighter than her attractiveness.

We’re not done with hits; the interconnections are almost endless, but you’ll have to put up with some repetition necessary to sustain the context each time. More tomorrow.

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2206. Compatibility Axioms #741-750


741. He can’t be successful to himself, if others see him weakened by his wife. His competitors are outside the home. Her dominant attitude can’t be missed there. [255]

742. The sexual pleasures for a woman are outweighed by the other things she needs for a happy life. Men have other interests too and for the most part let sex substitute for whatever is missing. [255]

743. When she makes herself worthy of a man by easily or readily providing sex, it doesn’t matter much if she’s pretty and attractive. Sloppy or comfortable will work for her, but it adds nothing to his reputation for having a good looker. It diminishes her worth as keeper. [255]

744. When you think men are only after one thing, your adolescent side shows. You primarily attract adultolescent men, and they fulfill your prophecy. Mature men figure you offer little else than sex, and they treat you accordingly. [258]

745. Virtual virginity is your best strategy to distinguish mature from immature men. [258]

746. Mature men devote themselves to what they perceive as a good woman, because they seek the pride of fatherhood. Adultolescent men think short term, dislike obligations, have little interest in new responsibility, usually look for another ‘looker’, and promise commitment that has very short legs. [258]

747. You should take advantage of your strengths and give him the appearance of your submissiveness to the man of the house. His perception is reality, and this means whatever he perceives satisfies him. You are far better equipped than he to work out the details to your advantage.[258]

748. A woman’s soft-hearted nature should be reserved for husband and kids. Her hard-headed nature is much more beneficial to her in dating and courtship. Soft-heartedness makes it easier to call a man worthy of her, which makes her vulnerable to join sisters in ex country. Easy to conquer, easy to leave. [260]

749. He cheats on her, so she cheats on him. The former hurts her, the latter terminates their relationship. [260]

750. Women abandon femininity, modesty, high moral standards, and other female strengths just to have a boyfriend or husband they can’t keep. [260]

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