Category Archives: feminine

2577. More Tips for Women — 11

  1. She can be more respectable. When not shown, he responds with less affection. Yes, wife’s respectability reflects on him and generates more appreciation.
  2. To show devotion to your spouse, don’t shirk responsibility and don’t overspend in the domains for which you are responsible.
  3. The feminist spirit makes women ‘stand up inside’. Disappointment and anger stir such women to look continually for flaws instead of benefits or blessings.
  4. Think and act as if you’re ‘standing up inside’, anger showing, feet off the ground, and you’ll not be cherished very long by a man.
  5. A couple’s dominant/submissive arrangement at conquest continues unchanged thereafter. The easier she yields, the bossier he becomes and remains.
  6. The issue of who submits to whom revolves around who fears most losing the other. The one most fearful submits on critical matters.
  7. The taproot of a good man or good woman is respect for the opposite sex greater than respect for one’s own gender.
  8. Four major impediments to a sound marriage are lack of mutual respect, kids outrank husband in mother’s mind, wife ungrateful for herself, and disagreement about husband’s responsibility.
  9. Self-centeredness is natural. Too much morphs into narcissism. Neither is the same as selfish (relative to someone else) or self-interest (one’s prime motivation).
  10. Self-interest motivates everyone. Self-centeredness motivates you. Us-centeredness motivates a couple. Selfishness motivates others against you.


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2576. More Tips for Women — 10

  1. When a woman does not believe in much, mushy thinking pushes her to believe in anything. It turns her soft-headed, and frustrations harden her heart.
  2. If some man doesn’t make himself worthy of a woman, she has to find and capture one. Many women try unmarried sex, but it has a poor record of success.
  3. Wise women plan to minimize disclosure of their sexual history long before new relationships begin. Mystery earns them more respect.
  4. Women are born pretty. Men are born handy. Unless they are changed by poor parenting, they develop with the potential of a compatible adult matchup!
  5. Women are born to be grateful for others. When they show it, they become important in others’ eyes, which earns them the self-importance that leads to happiness.
  6. Women are born very capable of changing in order to do what’s necessary to have their mate help fulfill girlhood hopes and dreams. Men are not born so capable.
  7. Women cheapen themselves by giving unobligated sex. It makes males more dominant, independent, and aggressive against female interests.
  8. Women expect their man’s words to program his heart. Not true. His actions program his heart. His words reflect his heart—if he’s truthful.
  9. Women have a unique capability to make superior choices dealing with the opposite sex, but only when they live by moral values, standards, and expectations that earn masculine respect.
  10. Women complain that men don’t act gentlemanly. The high self-respect and self-worth that ladies exhibit inspires men to act gentlemanly. Women set the standards up to which they expect men to step. No standards, no gentlemen. [NOTE: To loosen up moral values, radical feminists five decades ago shamed out of existence the social construct of the lady. Gentlemanly respect, chivalry, and courtesy faded rapidly thereafter.]


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2573. More Tips for Women — 07

  1. The trait that women condemn so easily, a man’s ego, reflects his sense of self-worth, self-satisfaction, and sense of significance. To criticize is to say he’s not good enough, which invites him to find another woman for his life.
  2. A man’s innocent or friendly touch in passing, much like flirting, is a small price for a woman to pay for the virtue of respect and popularity. It magnifies her worth. To object embarrasses someone who thinks well of her. She knows when it’s not innocent and how to deal with it.
  3. Her man’s physical infidelity isn’t terminal; she wants to talk. His woman’s physical infidelity, however, is considered the end; he expects to walk.
  4. A woman expects to frequently have her sense of self-importance confirmed. However, it is unnatural for men to volunteer affection, which he treats as a subset of his respect. So, the more respect she earns, the more likely he shows affection.
  5. A woman expresses love through closeness, nurturing, intimacy, and matching words. It confirms to her that she is doing right and demonstrates her gratitude to others. The more she loves, the more important she feels.
  6. A woman wants help to brighten her future in a society dominated by powerful people. Two men won’t knowingly share her, so one man dedicated to her works best.
  7. Female charm, indirectness, and patience enable women to govern values and interaction that shape relationships. Her inborn expertise enables her to capture and rule the rooster, whom she empowers to rule the roost that she builds for him.
  8. Femininity’s inherent virtues civilize men, balance male dominance, and suppress male aggressiveness at the macro level and govern interaction at the micro. IOW, to be a supermodel of feminine behavior (she only has to be attractive enough for one man) is to make life a piece of cake.
  9. Flowers as gifts have one purpose, to please women. Flowers are worthless and border on inappropriate for men even in sickness. If he’s in bed, give him something functional for his current ability—book, game, DVD, food.
  10. Men can more easily forget than forgive offense. Women can forgive but almost never forget offenses.


Filed under courtship, feminine, How she wins, marriage

2570. More Tips for Women — 05

  •  Women who step back from feminine attractiveness or toward manliness forfeit much of their relationship expertise and lose some ability to influence men.
  • Healthy marital habits form during courtship. For example, repeat refusals for unmarried sex bring out a man’s charm and displays of affection as he tries harder to conquer her. Over time, he learns to show attention and shower affection, and the habit forms.
  • Each woman expects much affection in the years to come, but Mr. GoodEnough should develop the habit during courtship. It’s too late after marriage, as it puts her in complaining mode, which makes it not his idea and he too easily resists or resents.
  • Men naturally crown their natural aggression and dominance with violence when they think they need it, unless females tame, civilize, and domesticate them. It starts with nurturing mothers and admirable sisters, depends greatly on chaste adolescent girls, and finalizes under the tutelage of a good wife. (Women as lovers and live-ins contribute little.)
  • Nagging and criticism alienate rather than teach men to lather affection on their woman.
  • Not in the pathological but the sociological sense, many women act manic-depressive seeking a man and obsessive-compulsive trying to live with one. Neither works well.
  • Children do, but adults  don’t improve when told of their faults. They improve to meet the expectations of those they like, admire, and respect—those who cite their strengths and reliability. Husbands are people and wives like, admire, and respect them or else they don’t improve.
  • Strong-willed feminine mystique, female modesty, and moral imperatives focus a man on a woman’s uniqueness, her gender independence, the ceiling of her expectations, and the moral floor that she expects of his behavior.
  • Women think and act like men. The more they do it, the less men honor the female gender as unique and praiseworthy for much more than sex and bending to masculine will.
  • Unlike men, women like to change whomever they find as inadequate. They often parent husbands as if they are boys.
  • Parents civilize and domesticate boys. Girls tame boys’ hormonal explosion by withholding sex. Wives motivate husbands to excel at husbanding and fathering. If not, marital relationships suffer.


Filed under courtship, feminine, Fickle female, marriage, sex differences

Blog 2569. More Tips for Women — 04

  • Women can best tolerate a man’s dominance, keep him, and restrain his promiscuous urges by working from the only playbook that puts women directly in charge of both social and domestic arenas—No Sex without Marriage.
  • The more diligently that females show respect and gratitude for males generally, the more likely each woman shows respect and gratefulness for her man.
  • The aggressive male nature requires taming. Mothers nurture boys into adolescents that respect women. Chaste girls civilize boys into men that expect to honor the dreams of women. Wives energize husbands to respect family, responsibilities, and relationships.
  • Wives’ number one complaint is that their husband does not show enough affection. Showing affection is unnatural for men. They have to be taught and best done in childhood. Affection is not a natural output of masculine love.
  • When words are enough to conquer, men offer little else.
  • Women either set and exemplify civilizing and domesticating values in all their relationships, or men impose masculine hubris on female sensibilities.
  • Feminism sours male devotion for one female, weakens family responsibility, discourages his showing affection, and curdles masculine incentives for honoring female dreams.
  • Feminists begrudge the male ego, but the process devalues females in male eyes more than it hurts men in female eyes.
  • Feminists change the culture by imposing political objectives outside the home, e.g., political correctness. Men take it personal and home life withers as wives are subliminally blamed. (Men angry at women generally don’t make very good mates.)
  • Feminists ridicule and devalue virginity. This dampens manly ego-stroking, belittles the masculine sense of conquest, and reduces the worth of females generally.

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2567 — More Tips for Women — 02

  1. Sex with a woman is the ultimate expression of male dominance. Ease or difficulty of conquest determines how strictly or respectfully he dominates their future.
  1. Hunter-conquerors appreciate tantalizing, challenging, and hard-to-capture prey. It motivates a man to investigate such a woman intensively, which stimulates his curiosity, arouses his imagination about what her worth could mean for him. Preoccupied with trying to figure her out, he wonders if conquest is all that necessary right now. Perhaps he should back off the pressure, he reasons, and their relationship continues….
  1. Conquering a woman generates masculine glory and accomplishment that far overpower excitement of subsequent episodes. To the male mind, conquest is the most dynamic event in every relationship. It’s what he is born for, his primary mission in life.
  1. The more a woman enables a man’s dominance to go uninhibited and one-sided, the more likely she’s headed for a surprise dump. Before conquest, she has to compete to protect her interest, and men expect her to defend against conquest.
  1. After conquest is the wrong time for a woman to fight against a man’s dominating or domineering habits, if she hopes to keep him. The harder she fights afterward, the more certain she will lose; conquerors expect cooperation as one of their rights.
  1. Before conquest a woman can inspire a man to change and make his dominating or domineering habits more tolerable or tactful. Or, she can accept him as is and not try to change him later. Or, she can drop him. She will most likely lose with other options.
  1. The lure of modest, feminine, and flattering apparel on a neatly trimmed body works best for a woman. It indicates self-respect, and men appreciate respect more than love.
  1. Mystery mixed with feminine self-respect and unexpected reluctance attract a man. She becomes his research project. The more he searches for weakness to bed her, the more he invests himself. Men find it difficult to throw away potential return on investment. It’s a process that enables her to convey values, standards, and expectations for his associating with her. By holding out and making him earn all that he learns, his aim shifts subliminally from sex to her, from expecting her to satisfy him to his proving his worth to her. It enables her to screen the best from the near-best men.


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2565. Default Motivations

Default motivations are those that reside in the psyche from birth and to which people turn when they lack other motivations. It is their nature in action.

Their natural and deep-rooted motivations differ, and a man’s is the simpler process. His prime motivator is to satisfy his sense of self-admiration, which he does through accomplishments. It’s a natural closed loop. 1) He seeks to admire self. 2) He accomplishes something—task, job, or R&R and being free to do so is itself satisfying—until his efforts satisfy him. 3) Satisfaction confirms self-admiration. He is free to energize himself to go around the loop many times daily. Moreover, he is self-sufficient. He can continually loop around the process without the help of others, unless he solicits it. The admiration of others may be appreciated but in the end it is unnecessary; he is independent at earning self-admiration (except boys are sometimes taught otherwise).

OTOH, her prime motivator is to confirm her sense of self-importance, which she does by doing something for others, spreading her love, and finding gratefulness in others. The last is the most productive, because feedback from gratitude she spreads confirms her importance and enough self-importance generates happiness. Her process is also a closed loop. But it always involves others, which adds to the complexity. She needs to prove her importance. 1) She finds reasons to be grateful for herself and others. 2) She spreads her love to confirm it. 3) Recipients express their gratitude by confirming her importance in their lives. Her self-importance thus confirmed, she returns to step 1).

A major theme of this blog is that the closer people act according to their nature inherited at birth, the more compatible they are as mates, happier as women, and more satisfied as men.



Filed under courtship, Dear daughter, feminine, marriage, sex differences, The mind