Category Archives: Feminism: OOPS!

2463. Journey to Feminine — Group 15

I continue trying to make feminine-think more beneficial to women than feminist-think.

  • Listen closely to what men have to say about their gender as if it’s all great news. Then call their bluff and expect them to prove it. (Keep them off balance so they can’t interrogate you or talk about sex.)
  • It’s overstated that men are the enemy. Question them to bring them over to the female side. By acknowledging their importance with friendliness, you also earn their respect. (Keep them uncomfortable, if they can get into your mind they can get in your panties.)
  • The feminine woman knows not to blame a man, at least not verbalize it. It puts him on the defensive and establishes the need to prove her wrong and nothing else registers with him until he wins in some form of a final encounter. (It also applies to cheating but that opens a whole new subject.)
  • With so many women open to provide sex to married men, pressures mount for husbands to cheat. Feminine wives know their best hope is to trust first and ‘spectacularize’ their own fidelity and remain silent about doubt and suspicion. Does it work? Over the long run the end results favor the wife, because confrontation shifts the high ground to him.
  • Feminine women listen only to men about Feminism. They look for ways to assuage the blame inflicted on men and the guilt aimed at them, which they assertively and even aggressively resist. They confirm that only men know how men should, would, or could act, and that feminine women understand.
  • Feminine mothers bring up daughters to please father, especially with old school maturity-before-sex rather than new school sex-before-maturity. When daughters live up to father’s expectations, they mature better and don’t lose their identity in adolescence. It also develops their intuitive ability to hold onto one man later in life.
  • Feminine women hide their superior role by not competing with husband, by celebrating husband’s accomplishments, and by complimenting his sense of significance among others. It highlights and justifies an us-centered cooperative rather than a self-centered competitive spirit. Proactively filling such a role confirms a man’s sense of significance, any loss of which is his greatest fear and especially loss of face to his wife.
  • Feminine women promote chastity, honor lengthy courtship, and highly value marital longevity. It keeps the Marrying Man on track to earn what he seeks, a unique wife.
  • Feminine women claim dependence on their man and keep looking for ways to be grateful, both of which reflect respect that every man expects from his woman. It also encourages his sense of family responsibility.

And so, it ain’t easy to be feminine in today’s marketplace and domestic scene. But outcomes benefit women by more easily pleasing than blaming men.


Filed under courtship, feminine, Feminism: OOPS!, How she wins, marriage

2462. Journey to Feminine — Group 14

Politically inspired and following their propaganda, feminists make up their own initiatives and deal with men and mates combatively. Relationships crumble and disintegrate under the competitive pressures of feminists refusing to quit, and men refusing to lose. Feminine women tend toward the opposite.

  1. Feminine women exploit their inborn patience to find, capture, and keep a man. They screen for quality of character, especially integrity and sense of responsibility; healthy habits, good work ethic, and heart willing to share.
  2. Where masculine strengths and manly civility are purposely not appreciated, men resent, resist, and sometimes retaliate. Respect of females is lost, as women yield their relationship skills to follow the feminist-inspired, sex-themed pop culture. It’s not that way with highly feminine women; they know that unearned appreciation works best for women. It also helps make them unique.
  3. Except for a man who falls in love at first sight, devotion forms over time from his actions to purposely please a woman, and it later doubles in strength when he learns that he’s pleased just to be pleasing her.
  4. Femininity teaches women to be chaste and therefore respectable, patient and therefore undemanding, and likeable and loyal and therefore loveable.
  5. Today’s relationships worsen in the modern world of masculine-style sexual freedom for females. Men and women first meet, interact, and even date. He initiates attention and persuasion. She follows by providing unobligated sex just for fun and lust, to see if she can ‘earn’ a boyfriend, or to see if she can get an obligation that could lead to marriage. She may even initiate somewhere along the line. It’s an attitude that fails for women trying to keep the man they lure and capture.
  6. Modern women lower their taste and expectations in men just to have a boyfriend or husband. Men lower their taste for what’s attractive, which turns more women into  disposables after conquest. That’s the popular model, but the feminine woman finds it distasteful, unattractive, and contrary to her expectations for her future life.
  7. Without a man, women find misery. With a husband, they often find misery. Which is the worst? Alone or with somebody? Her feminine intuition pushes a good woman to forget the misery and search and find satisfaction and gratitude. Whatever we think about, we get more of it.
  8. A sex-based relationship that women expect to work proves different than expected. At first blush, her anchor seems to hold him. Inevitable societal effects lead men to focus on more than one woman at a time. Then, as husbands shift focus to another blossom, wives retaliate by seeking escape from misery with a man to misery without one.

Feminists seek to be in charge in the foreground, to wrestle for control of present events, which is a man’s territory. They copy the masculine drive to compete and use legal combat and government pressure to gain dominance over men. It’s short-range thinking that leads to relationship disruptions and intolerance.

The feminine woman seeks to be in charge in the background, where she is better positioned to calm present-day upheavals and brighten future events and developments. Her feminine nature favors generating peace and cooperation with men and her man. She seeks to capture and exploit her man’s masculinity, incur favor, solicit support, and maintain domestic well-being. Her feminine-oriented relationship expertise produces success with those objectives.


Filed under courtship, feminine, Feminism: OOPS!, How she wins, marriage

2461. Journey to Feminine — Part 13

The prevalence of doubt about Feminism in the social and domestic domains has energized much more thought of restoring feminine behavior. Feminine thinking and behavior guides women to make fewer mistakes dealing with men. So, this series continues to promote the feminine over the feminist.

  • The popular feminist attitude supports equal sharing of housekeeping and childcare responsibilities. Harsh female intentions to equalize workload weaken a man’s loyalty. Her likeability plummets and his love follows. Husbands resent, resist, and may retaliate against the friction caused in the expectation of marital equality. Most men don’t mind helping and cooperating, but they all recognize that equality is impossible to both achieve and sustain. Therefore, it has no place in their home; it’s not the wife so much as her politics.
  • Feminist-inspired women seem inept at winning the battle of the sexes. They face doubts or immense troubles whether trying to attract a good man, avoiding hit-and-run relationships, expecting a Mr. Right, screening for Mr. Good Enough, identifying worthless men before yielding sex, dodging the Manipulating Man, avoiding the violent man, capturing the Marrying Man, avoiding accumulation of troublesome ‘baggage’, buying into faithfulness, expecting to be loyal, avoiding the man’s game of shack up, living with a man for more than a few years, focusing on being likeable, growing into the right person to hold a man for life, and finding the right path that all women seek—the one to happiness.
  • Some even adopt stupid rationalizations: I can get pregnant to capture or hold a man. A married man is better than nothing. If we don’t cohabit, I’ll lose him. We’re great in bed, so he both loves me and can’t stay away from our great sex.

OTOH, a woman lives life with men or a man more successfully, when she lives it according to the feminine side of her female nature—so she favors maturity! She does not absolutely need a man, but she wants company or assistance at specific times in life—so she takes time! She wants a dependable relationship with someone stronger and perhaps more influential in shaping events that impact her and her children—so she generates patience! She wants help to brighten her future in a society dominated by catastrophes, powerful people, and unexpected events—so she judges carefully! She wants comfort in needy times and seeks companionship to prevent loneliness—so she sacrifices in the present to brighten her future! She particularly wants all those things by late in life—so she earns what she wants!

Feminist theory, dogma, and propaganda brought troublesome conditions to women dealing with men, and men have gained the upper hand. Male dominance continues to expand in sync with expansion of more sex as the standard female pursuit. Fortunately, mature women are beginning to see a brighter light in Femininity. More to follow.


Filed under courtship, Culture & Politics, feminine, Feminism: OOPS!, How she loses, How she wins, marriage

2458. Journey to Feminine — Part 11

The most popular tactics that women have to pique a man’s curiosity, stir his imagination, and hold his interest come naturally to the feminine woman. Moreover, the tactics die in the presence of Feminism.

  • Her heart finds it easy to generate ladylike behavior and inspire it in others.
  • Feminine mystique takes a man’s focus off a single mother’s burdens, status, and expectations. Mystery expands his self-interest toward lifting burdens.
  • Modesty attracts men; its uniqueness creates its own mystique and slows a man’s high flying self-confidence.
  • Modest attire and manner shift male eyes from sex and onto her as a lady. It opens her role as woman and more than just a sex object.

Obeying her feminine heart more dynamically guides a woman. More easily she can bypass feminist-think and slip naturally into behaviors that present her best qualities when dealing with men. Such as these:

♣ Feminine women don’t permit masculine grossness in their presence on the basis that it dishonors female dignity. By defending her dignity, she earns manly respect, which is essential for a man’s love.

♣ Feminine women in principle don’t accept masculine-style sexual freedom as desirable female behavior. It turns love making into coarse primal urges. Expecting her to participate offends those who conscientiously expect to be treated as a lady.

♣ Feminine spirit avoids ‘getting in his face’. Avoidance protects a woman’s ability to win a man’s cooperation and shape his thoughts and behavior.

♣ Feminine women use their natural flexibility. It flows out of female soft-heartedness, mothering instinct, cooperative spirit, and other qualities. All of which is monitored by their inborn hard-headedness. A feminine woman appears that much more unique, because men lack that natural flexibility for identifying much less smoothing out the wrinkles of life.

♣ Feminine women expect no legal assistance to elevate women over men. They know how to overcome male dominance and promote male worthiness. Handling the remainder they face makes their gender superior.

♣ Feminine women keep the political, legal, and economic status of females out of the home. They know it can backfire into turmoil and damage a relationship.

♣ Feminine women know not to use anger and ridicule to put a man ‘in his place’. The proper place for her man is either alongside or pursuing her and not driven away with short temper or vengeful thoughts.

♣ Feminine woman energizes husband to keep his seed at home. Being neither sycophant nor slave, she respects his domination, expresses gratitude for who he is, and confirms with actions her dependence on what he does. She eagerly salutes his sense of significance and just as eager not to weaken his significance in bed.

♣ The feminine spirit makes women think less like men. They find solace in thinking of ‘you before me’ and ‘us before you or me’. Thus enabled, it encourages them to exploit their natural expertise for holding a man.

In addition to more freely yielding unmarried sex, feminist-think prompts younger women to make more fundamental mistakes dealing with men. We look at reversing that next.

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Filed under courtship, feminine, Feminism: OOPS!, Her glory, How she wins, marriage, sex differences

2454. Blame and Complain: An Unsurprising Reaction

Her Highness Milena at 2453 makes a good case to justify what women do today. It’s logical, reasonable, stems from pop culture, which stems from Feminism, but which doesn’t work all that successfully with men. Such belief puts women at disadvantage because of the very different nature of men and women.

Without knowing why, modern women find that marital solidarity kind of weakens or fades. Husband just doesn’t work out to be the man a woman expects. It’s a sign that he dislikes what’s happening around him, and she’s usually in charge of that.

So, I have to verbalize why Milena’s model seems to work but believers unsuspectingly produce what they don’t want. Her paragraphs follow broken up so my comments can follow her statements.

“I’m a bit confused. I’ve read elsewhere that it’s better to be clear and direct towards men (in a respectful way of course, as we would treat anyone) because men are not good at taking hints.” It’s accurate and well-phrased. It’s the modern mantra developed to confirm equality. However, men do take hints; they simply pay more attention to people they highly respect. (Admittedly, women are more skillful at taking hints, and so they expect men to be the same.)

“And to back up your directness with actions instead of talking about it endlessly until the man zones you out. (I guess the latter would be considered complaining!)” Directness with actions should resolve her problem. Example: ‘Honey, the hose was leaking and flooding my flower bed. So, I tightened the fitting and it worked’. It’s a good reason to mention it. Her fixing it changes a complaint into more self-respect, which enables her to show more respect for hubby, which he sees as greater worth in her, which then strengthens the marital process.

“I don’t see how it’s healthy for a woman to always have to hide what is bothering her, or am I misunderstanding you?” You’re right. It’s not healthy but it’s not unhealthy either. If she’s looking for a solution or working on resolving what bothers her, hiding it doesn’t bother her. OTOH, if she’s so frustrated that she has to dump it on hubby, surrounding every frustration is a swarm of gratitude that can calm the frustration. She does, however, need to teach herself to let frustration trigger her to look for what all she otherwise possesses. Finding gratitude has a very calming effect on the female nature.

“Wouldn’t a man who is devoted to her want to know if there is something wrong, so he could try and fix it?” Absolutely, but it’s all in the telling. Directness can too easily come across as an order. Indirectness can easily come across as she depends on him.

“Of course we all need to take responsibility for our feelings and learn to make ourselves happy….” Dumping her problems on hubby does not make her happy although she may enjoy doing it (and perhaps even vengefully). Happiness flows from her gratitude for who she is and what she possesses that help generate her good life. Born to be good, she only needs to do good; the encouraging key to which is gratitude.

Can she be more grateful that she has a husband than what she wants to complain about? If so, she just took a step toward getting what she wants without disturbing his feelings toward her with blame or complaint. Encouraged by newly cited gratefulness, she naturally turns to her talents and skills as a relationship expert to produce a result that pleases her and hubby. Once she appreciates how grateful she is for all that she has, her attitude changes to love first and find fault and express blame never. Earning her way to happiness by finding more and more for which to be grateful naturally steers her clear of disturbing the peace and harmony she has already worked so hard to produce.

“…but if her husband is showing lack of respect or consideration towards her, I don’t think a wife should just patiently smile and take it.” Right! But she has other options than confronting him, which brings out blame, complaint, or expectation that he must do something to suit her. That is the result of directness, it raises his competitive hostility and men intend to not lose battles with their wives.

Demanding respect or special consideration from someone earns the opposite. It signifies lack of self-respect in the one who demands or even politely asks for respect.

A man’s respect of a woman forms before conquest. A different kind of respect grows after that from her accomplishments that he can admire. Prime examples: 1) She talks to God and turns her life around to follow Jesus Christ such that he admires both her dedication and new way that she views him. If she’s already saved, she gets closer to Jesus. 2) She develops new lifestyle habits at her morning mirror that empower her to take greater charge of her life and those around her. It’s a good place to ID all the things for which she’s grateful, which also puts her on the road to happiness and changes her attitude to a winner instead of complainer or one routinely needing help. (See the mirror time series at 2123-2127 plus others listed in CONTENT page.)

“In that case, it would be better to be single with your self-respect and well-being intact.” Yes, you can easily exchange places with another woman who seeks a man, while you start looking again. If a woman looks and finds gratefulness in her life, she won’t be thinking about that option.

Most women prefer the misery of marital uncertainty to the certainty of single-life misery. For those who prefer the former, I recommend devotion to God or devotion to self. More church for the former, more mirror time for the latter.

It goes further. Women like to object that men claim she’s his woman, in effect he owns her. OTOH, she can own everything else in her life when she relies on her natural skills, talents, and interpersonal abilities to generate and manage her relationship and marriage. She elevates him to chairman of the board and herself as CEO. In real life, CEOs don’t complain to their chairman. Their worthiness arises out of their serene management as the chairman sees it. She works to make everything work but reserves veto power for him. When it works that way to his pleasure, she has uncorked Mr. Right. It’s not short but a rewarding journey for a wife.

Thank you, Milena, for a well-prepared and -expressed comment. That I disagree reflects our political differences. What you cite has no bearing on how well you’re appreciated for this contribution to better understanding men and women. You opened a door that has needed opening for a long time.


Filed under Dear daughter, Feminism: OOPS!, How she wins, marriage, sex differences

2443. Journey to Feminine — Part 10

Acrimony. Relationships shorten and get progressively worse in the modern world of masculine-style sexual freedom. Men and women meet, interact, date, court, and even marry. He delivers attention and persuasion, and she provides unobligated sex. It’s done for fun and lust according to mutual taste. She may even initiate. According to their gender value system, men couldn’t have it any better. But many men know differently and search for a better life, which invariably includes a good woman. They, however, are hard to identify. So men stick to the modern game plan, sex without obligation, while they hope for something better to come along.

In that feminist inspired world, graciousness drowns, mutual gratefulness withers, men resist marriage, and husbands respond disruptively to feminist attitudes in their castle. Respect, courtesy, and good manners are neither expected nor practiced. Masculine strengths and manly civility are purposely underappreciated, and men resent, resist, and often retaliate. Male aggression arises easily.

Deep devotion to one woman is almost mutually exclusive, what with the feminist spirit and expectations. Commitment usually means temporary. Husbands too easily shift focus to another blossom. Wives seek escape from self-inflicted misery with a man to the misery of being without one.

Both sexes sour on their own marriage; frustrated wives turn against men and wounded men turn against marriage. The institution of family withers and wrinkles as if dying of old age.

That’s the feminist model and its consequences. It’s what feminine-minded women face as they try to fabricate more lasting relationships. The competition isn’t easy, so they use a better model that offers so much more to their man and works better and easier for themselves.

Matrimony. The feminine woman causes those incompatible effects to weaken, fade, or die. Motivated by the glorious female nature that floods her heart, feminine behaviors generate graciousness, gratitude, respect, courtesy, and good manners to salve the wounds of feminism. She knows how to tame and prevent male aggression. She appreciates masculine strengths and manly civility as essential for her to have a good life. It’s unusual for her man to resent, resist, and retaliate against her behaviors; he appreciates her femininity too much. She expects to see and depends on his firm devotion, permanent commitment, and her intent and ability to keep her man. She produces minimal misery because of her ability to discourage and avoid it.

Thus, the feminine woman adds color to a man’s B&W world in ways that he wants to be part of her development of relationship and family.


Filed under courtship, Culture & Politics, feminine, Feminism: OOPS!, Her glory, marriage

2438. Journey to Feminine — Group 09

To fully grasp the benefits of Femininity, one must examine how Feminism has  spread throughout intersex relations. Unaware to women, many feminist spirits underlie every relationship. We almost never pay attention to our habits unless they cause problems, and feminist habits cause more problems to their man than to the habit owner. If unmentioned by a man, which is now politically incorrect and not done too much, women thus know little about how to avoid being feminist. Of course, the truly feminine almost automatically obliterates feminist-like habits.

  1. Feminism blames men and the spirit pushes feminist-like women to compete with their man in domains he considers his own. Example: tell him HOW to do almost any task rather than WHAT to do. Competitive frustration follows. The HOW implies inadequacy, while masculinity implies the opposite. Highly feminine ladies know better.
  2. Without much contrary thought, feminist-like women find their man doesn’t measure up to feminist-defined expectations about male behavior. It leads to finger-pointing and fault-finding, which escalates over time. Mutual trust and gratitude decline. She’s prompted into nagging, which is just a higher gear for speeding a man out of her life. The bible also scorns the ‘quarrelsome wife’ in Proverbs 21:9, 21:19, 25:24, 27:15-16. Femininity discourages such waste of relationship benefits.
  3. Feminism in the home prompts women to adopt the male preference for directness and abandon the female preference of indirectness. Feminists weaken their natural influence. Even worse, men don’t appreciate women that ‘get in his face’. It makes her a competitor and he takes offense, perhaps tagging her as a nag. The feminine lady reverses doing those things; she knows better what works with a man and has little need to show off to get her way.
  4. Feminist thinking in the home inspires women to look more for their man’s imperfections rather than manly leadership and strengths. Eventually, a man tires, his respect wanes, alienation sets in, and disruption or departure follows. OTOH, the feminine lady finds gratefulness in his manly character, capability, and other blessings.
  5. Matrimony can evolve into acrimony where graciousness drowns, mutual gratefulness withers, and husbands react disruptively to wives. Where respect, courtesy, and good manners disappear from the females’ instinctive play book, then male aggression escalates. Feminine ladies intuitively know how to avoid those things and don’t let them happen.

Nowadays, the progeny of radical feminists continue to belittle and seek the demise of the feminine wife. It’s a political thing to diminish wifely influence. And so, men and women and husbands and wives are encouraged to find fault with each other and thus make no permanent alliances. It’s the war on women, realized. Even though at one time wives were the generators of American greatness by leading and encouraging their men to succeed at work, American feminists discourage more of it as a political objective.



Filed under Culture & Politics, Dear daughter, feminine, Feminism: OOPS!, marriage