Category Archives: Fickle female

2869. Typical Male Behavior — 03

A lot of repetition exists in this summarizing series. I do it on purpose to reinforce the importance to those women who hope to understand better the male nature.

  1. Women live according to what their men say and want, except as the smarter woman conditions her man to help fulfill her hopes and dreams. She hears and heeds him in the short term, but she’s focused on the future. He finds her attractive, pursues, and wins her love, but he bypasses the thought that she has unfulfilled hopes and dreams that originate in childhood. She’s free to work on it secretly.
  2. Ever present in background during pursuit, he continually seeks to bed her. She refuses and even rejects the concept without destroying his hope. Her love of him is neither admirable, nor a virtue, nor important to him except as it facilitates conquest. She does best to keep her developing love to herself. Save it until he earns it.
  3. He keeps pursuing and learning about qualities that he admires. Until much later rather than sooner, he finds himself devoted to her such that he realizes she’s more important to him as partner than sex target. He recognizes that he truly loves her when he chooses the latter of these consequences: He’s satisfied with his present life and how he lives, but he expects to be more satisfied living with her, and it prompts his proposal.
  4. Men pursue what’s hard to conquer; they seek to achieve and invest themselves in time, effort, and money to the extent she’s worthy of conquest. Men don’t love as women love. Neither do men recognize and appreciate how women love and expect to be loved in return. A woman expresses her love and appreciates herself for doing it. Her man may or may not derive pleasure or compliment from what she says. If she says it, he takes it more as deserved than admired, and he is that much nearer to conquest. If she doesn’t share her love, it’s not her loss but her gain. He has less knowledge of her to work with, which means he has to work harder to win her.
  5. Modern women have long forgotten the need for religious and moral imperatives to keep men user friendly to women. Both porn and the pursuit of pleasure being the result of a man’s initiatives, they provide the easiest satisfaction about who he is, what he does, and who he does it with. Also, he finds it easy to love ever-greater pleasure, and he seeks an endless path to it. He has little or no need for a woman except for short range involvement.


Filed under courtship, Dear daughter, Fickle female, How she loses, sex differences

2861. Male Fantasy Realized

Another cultural debasement of females slips in under the awareness of Americans. It’s intended to slyly convince more people that sex for pleasure is the primary sex drive in humans. IOW, bring the excesses developed in porn houses into the home, and even women will learn to like it.

In no way do I seek to belittle the pleasure in sex. I condemn the motivational force that sponsors and encourages people seeking sex for pleasure. It’s not the pleasure that damages relationships, it’s the pursuit that betrays the goodness in human character—of which women should have the greater concern about avoidance.

I dispute it. I seek to convince women that it’s egregiously bad news for their gender, female life, and especially to capture and keep a man permanently and fulfill the hopes and dreams inherent in the female nature, to which it’s contrary.

My objection is primarily based on this principle of human life. Sex for pleasure always demands more the next time; what do you think makes porn expand into ever increasing and ever enlarging versions of tools and new orifices to attack? How does anal fisting appeal to females without it being a follow on to whatever went before?

Hooked on pleasure, one can’t get enough and expects more the next time. New tools, new ways, new refreshments, extra sensations, or new sources to exceed what went before. Men lead and drive the bus, but dumb women provide the fuel. Men get what they want, and women don’t realize how their lives are being changed from what they want as they miss the more important things in life. When relationships are dominated by sex for pleasure, the woman can’t achieve what she expects of life.

Actually, the sexes are designed against sex for pleasure. If it were part of our design, our most primal motivational forces would not be so obvious in our behavior. IOW, sex for pleasure, as you will see, is the aberration and not the standard. At birth both sexes inherit other motivational forces that govern their sex lives.

Both sexes are born to get their way associating with others. Women are born to recognize very early in life they have a valuable birthright that men will honor when each woman respects herself deliberately, sufficiently, and defensively against first penile penetration. That birthright difference enables women to get their way with men who are stronger, dominant, and intent on conquest and quick departure. Discretion to participate sexually belongs to each woman, and she’s adequately prepared from early girlhood to capitalize on her own success.

Her side of the “when to yield” puzzle looks like this. Five natural motivational forces energize sex in the woman’s world:

  • Born with a physiological urge to nurture, it triggers the urge to procreate.
  • She has a psychological need to assuage the wants of herself or the needs of someone else, either of which can stimulate her to copulate.
  • Possessing the primal need of self-importance, free will, and urge to get her way, it ignites ambitions to outdo and outshine other women as a candidate for mating. She empowers herself by negotiating sex such that she earns her own uniqueness and the respect of men or man; each man’s respect being essential for his love to arise.
  • She comprehends the worth of sexually yielding to each man, especially the uniqueness and value of their first sexual encounter together. (When she finally yields to one man, he paid whatever price she demanded. He easily convinces himself that he ‘owns’ her, expects not to compete anymore with her, and that she will cooperate with him and his ambitions. It’s the male nature in action.)
  • She needs intimacy, and it is a prime motivator for yielding sex. (Her nature craves intimacy; she can almost never get enough from her man. Especially when her spirits are down, which can be quite often. Intimate touching, fondling, caressing, and sweet words that enhance body closeness fuel a woman’s willingness or desire, which makes it easier to continue deeper into the process to please herself, her partner, or even make an unanticipated mistake.)

The wisdom inherent in the feminine nature empowers women to utilize sex for bonding, generating compatibility, and competing with other women. (Neither promiscuity nor orgasmic pleasure is natural to the female gender. Both arise from lessons learned in life about the urge to feel better or important about oneself, however momentary that may be.)

Those natural urges enable women to think they understand the male sex drive. Not so.

Primal motivational urges energize four versions of the male sex drive. These bring proactive sex into a man’s world:

  • His interest in sex brings females onto the playing field. Without the urge to conquer, women can be ignored.
  • He has a deep-rooted, unchangeable, and physiological urge to copulate with every female he finds attractive and maybe some beyond attractive. (Women witness but can’t comprehend the meaning behind this phenomenal and most primal expression of male sex drive.)
  • He has an instinctive competitive urge to outdo and outshine other men. In response, he seeks to conquer women that other men can’t, enable bragging rights by doing so, and add boaster’s value to virginity.
  • He possesses a steadfast ambition for frequent and convenient access to sex, and he’s willing to pay a high price for it, if and when the right woman coaxes, coaches, and loves him into paying her price.
  • He has an instinctive craving to do something pleasurable with each erection, and instinct pushes him toward penile penetration of a vagina. (Penetration completes his conquest, goal achieved. Beyond first penetration, however, he’s just another sexual performer—good, poor, wasteful, selfish, indifferent.)

Orgasm is not a prime motivator of men. Pleasurable and rewarding, yes, but not a driving force until it’s about to arrive momentarily and as expected.

Those primal sex urges combine to make men compete with other males for females and compete with females for conquest—but for little else afterward. After conquest, he’s beat out other men, he paid her price, and he expects cooperation from the woman he ‘owns’. He refuses to compete further with her. Men reliably find a way out or avoid competing with a conquered woman. Even if she’s a keeper and they marry, if he has to compete with her, she loses much of her likeability.

Why? Conquest changes their relationship dramatically. He used his persuasive interest achieving conquest, in ‘buying her’. IOW, he paid whatever price she demanded. Job’s done; she’s his. Afterward she belongs to him, and he expects cooperation. He’s now free to pursue others. He may lose significant arguments to her. So why take the risk of her winning and his losing the upper hand won with conquest? Men are not dumb; they only seem to be that way because women don’t understand how men are born to be different.

Even though born to be compatible as mates, the sexes differ greatly on matters of purpose, love, and sex. Society and life in it are as peaceful and satisfying as both sexes live according to their nature, the way they are born. Things start to fall apart, when the sexes begin for whatever reason to act like the opposite sex and thus betray their respective nature.

In which case, women lose dominance of cultural values, standards, and expectations. Men run society according to male dominated and female-unfriendly values, standards, and expectations. Neither sex appreciates or respects the other very much, blame spurs anger, and children self-develop to tunes played on the quarrelsome tongues of disrespectful parents, teachers, and adults.

Those primal sex urges combine to make males compete with males for females and compete with females for conquest but for little else afterward. Sex for pleasure as a motivational force curtails and probably ends the female friendliness of sexual relations according to their respective natures.


Filed under courtship, Culture & Politics, Dear daughter, Fickle female, How she loses, marriage, sex differences

2860. Review of Archived Comment

I visited my archives of twenty thousand comments and found one to which I had not responded. It may have some lessons to see how feminist-think was operating a decade ago and has now come to roost dropping guano on relationships.

The following is from a William Egmont via So, by the nature of the comments, I presume a man did not write what follows dated way back in December 2007. I respond in CAPS, although I’m sure it will never be seen by the originator.



“Yes, there is more conflict when two partners are equal, for now, unlike before, they strive for the same goals. [CAN YOU EVER BE SURE OF SAME GOALS?] But, as most of society has come to accept, demands for equality are not unreasonable, unprecedented, or unmerited; they are just, fair, and right. [AS YOU POINT OUT, “DEMANDS FOR EQUALITY” FIT AND HELP DEVELOP THE BATTLE SCENES WE SEE TODAY. JUST THE DEMAND, BUT NO EQUALITY. THE INSTANT AN EQUAL CONDITION IS ACHIEVED, SOMEONE POINTS OUT AN INEQUALITY ABOUT IT. THE NATURE OF EVERYONE BORN TO GET THEIR WAY SPRINGS THE TRAP.]

“Therefore, it is not only the woman’s responsibility to change; it is the man’s as well. [THAT IS FEMINIST-THINK.] The man must adapt to these changes, [WHY MUST MEN BETRAY THEIR OWN NATURE AGAINST CHANGING THEMSELVES, JUST BECAUSE WOMEN SAY SO?] to learn to accept and adjust to the competition, the “adverse factors.” Equality should not mean exclusively that women become like men; it demands also that men become like women, [THAT FRUITLESS FEMINIST DEMAND LEADS THE WAY TO MAKING ENEMIES OF MEN AND WOMEN.] in ways that will make relationships work again. [FALSE HOPE.]

“This isn’t good news for many men, necessarily; but for a healthy relationship to thrive while both parties are equal, concessions and changes must happen on both sides. These are, after all, relationships we’re talking about, with two equal beings; and, as in other aspects of relationships, cooperation is teamwork is essential.” [THOSE ARE FEMINIST POLITICAL RAMBLINGS THAT IGNORE THE INBORN NATURE OF BOTH MEN AND WOMEN. FEMINISTS AND FOLLOWERS BETRAY THEIR NATURE IN MYRIAD WAYS TO OPENLY ACT LIKE MEN OR TO CAPTURE AND HOLD A MAN. MEN ARE NOT SO EASILY SEDUCED TO BETRAY THEIR NATURE.]


Filed under Culture & Politics, Fickle female, How she loses, sex differences

2859. Snowflake Creation

This is a hot subject for me. Younger Americans in the Millennial subculture irritate or disappoint their associates. We all talk about the snowflakes’ faults, but no one has yet identified the cause or prevention of more of the same. I step in there.

Most of the snowflake personality can be blamed on the lack of any sense of responsibility to other people. Judith Rich Harris claims in “The Nurture Assumption” that children develop their personalities more in connection with peers than parents. Snowflakes have a peer environment that includes social media associates, and so their personality development automatically distorts contrary to mature adult values, standards, and expectations.

Snowflakes have this in common. They don’t particularly like how they fit in the world in spite of faux bravado to the contrary. They lack a sense of responsibility to others and even to themselves. Both of those irritating shortcomings are correctable between the toddler years and puberty. It’s a function of parental leadership in childhood.

Primarily, parents of snowflakes lack that leadership ability. They don’t know what to do or how to do it. They mistakenly take the easy way out and do what makes the parents feel good about themselves under the guise of making their offspring feel good. Thus, kids grow up in a world of constant entertainment.

Snowflakes are absent the sequential upbringing that teaches them to be responsible adults; which is a function of self-discipline; which is a function of self-development; which is a function of responsibilities assigned and developed into habit in childhood; which is a function of chores, special tasks, and similar responsibilities up to which a child learns to achieve, master by themselves, and thereby self-develop on their own; and which forms their adult maturity, unlike snowflakes, with a strong sense of self-discipline.

Girls brought up to self-develop that way also earn self-respect that enables them to stand up and compete against the dominance of boys and men. Boys brought up the same way learn self-love that enables them to respect girls and later love a woman.


Filed under Culture & Politics, Dear daughter, Fickle female, nurturing

2850. Gotta Change My Mind Again

For some months or years I’ve been calling the female the superior sex. It’s close but not accurate enough. Hereafter, I will call it the governing gender.  Governance within relationships, couples, and marriages is more functional, easier for women to grasp the meaning and men to accept, and less argumentative than is ‘superior’. Guy is my name, clarity is my game.


Natural Law: Females capture and keep a man with everything else but sex; success is far more who she is and what she does than what she has or was. So females waste time, waste feminine effort, mislead men, and relinquish the driver’s seat when they attract with sex or program themselves to be sexy.



Filed under courtship, Culture & Politics, Dear daughter, Fickle female, How she loses, Sociology 101

2848. Man-think about Her “Do You Love Me?”

The male nature—man-think—works like the following when confronted with a woman’s angst about her worthiness to her man.

Every day I figure out more clearly that when a woman asks a man if he loves her, she calls up little but confusion in his mind. Out of that confusion comes a lot of vibes that do not necessarily help a relationship.

She routinely asks, “Do you love me?” without realizing that men just don’t think about love and its meanings the same as women.

  • His mind prevents him from calling it love in his heart. As a man, he can’t do all the things that she does to care for and do in her loving of others. He’s nowhere near the caring person she is, and caring is what her love is all about. It’s not his nature, and so he’s caught in a whirl of confusion trying to deal with his favorite woman, when she asks that question so vital to her own well-being.
  • He wants to answer but he can’t find sincerity. Love as she knows it does not reside in his heart. He knows that, but also knows that she expects it to be there. He doesn’t want to lie, disappoint, or come up short in her eyes. So, he blurts out “of course” and guilt—from the dishonesty within himself—keeps him from going much further to convince her.
  • Trying to be honest, he spouts out whatever is needed to get him clear of the moment. However, sincerity is missing from his response. She senses being somewhat cheated, uncertainty sets in, and she begins to inquire more often. The more often she asks, the worse he feels from inability to be sincere to someone he admires, likes, and appreciates with all his heart.

Now, if she asked ‘do you like me’ she would get several different responses. Probably an excess of affirmatives and, perhaps, more frequent displays of attention, affection, and appreciation. Man-think works well and clearly—easily sincere and honest—when the question is whether someone or something is liked.

Months ago I concluded that love is never enough to hold a couple together as women are prone to believe. I began writing about mutual likeability being the paramount ingredient in a successful relationship. That which I posed above confirms my earlier decisions. Deal with men in likeability rather than love and a woman will find a more accurate path to where she stands with her man.

In short, her just asking a man if he loves her can weaken his dedication to her. How? It weakens his dedication to himself to be honest, which weakens his character, and which undercuts his ability to treat his woman with the highest regard he can muster at any given moment.

To help keep a man honest, sincere, and forthright, never ask him if he loves you. Ask him if he likes you, and—as a woman—you can find out the strength of his sincerity by his actions. In short, for a woman to find the love of a man, she must first be so likeable that he struggles just to be around her. Three little words may satisfy her ears, but his sincerity, honesty, and actions prove his dedication.


Filed under courtship, Dear daughter, feminine, Fickle female, How she wins, marriage, sex differences

2833. Love is Never Enough — 11: Magic Marital Glue-PostScript

I offer this postscript on yesterday’s article about mutual devotion. The subject disturbed my grumpy sleep and deserves attention.

Both sexes are born with the motivational urge to make themselves feel good by pleasing someone else. As shown with mutual devotion at 2832, it’s the major motivator that springs out of mutual likeability and brings a couple closer together over time.

Based solely on how the sexes are born differently and contrary to how people act today, here’s my conclusion about how mates short circuit their relationship with pet or pets. In the interest of full disclosure, neither Grace nor I ever had a pet in our lives, but one son had an outdoor dog. I can’t say it helped us, but at least the absence of another love object didn’t weaken our 59 years together.

  • To the extent a man makes himself feel good by pleasing his pet, he likely has less time or interest in making himself feel good by pleasing his woman. At the very least, his interest is shared if not diminished, and what female wants to feel diminished of her man’s attention? If her likeability declines, his pet’s role expands in his life. Does a man’s love object take his interest away from his woman? Sometimes, probably, and at least enough to enable relationship cracks to develop or not fade away. After all, she has a competitor within the home and no way to compete with his other love object.
  • Born with self-love and mother love, women have an advantage. They can make themselves feel good by pleasing their man out of their ability to love, and please their pet out of her ability for mother love. Her two-faces of love enable her to sustain her relationship in spite of unfriendly shortcomings and cracks that may appear in the façade of who they are as a couple.
  • As for jointly loved pet or pets, is she really gratified by his attention to another love object? Is he satisfied with her attention to something other than him?

The continual increase in pet popularity matches the decline in the ability of couples to stay together. Statistically? I don’t know. As with most social and domestic trends, stats only show the degree and give people something to argue about; the trends remain clear and more ominous for women.


Filed under Culture & Politics, Fickle female, marriage, sex differences