If following her nature, a woman wants a good man as she defines good. In today’s social and domestic marketplaces, both a clear definition and good men are absent. According to women, that is. Men will argue the contrary all day long, but they neither make it clear nor right.
An old maxim says, he will treat you like he treats his mother. Keep that thought in mind, as I think you should spend more time in the company of your dates and their mothers together and even separately if your man is not available.
On her turf, his turf, and even your turf, check out how treats her. Then take it to the next level. Analyze specifics such as these examples:
- Does he listen attentively to her? What techniques does she use to capture and hold his attention?
- Does she wait at doors for his opening of them? Hold the car door? How else does she show her respect of him?
- Is his respect of her so sincere that it would happen even if you were not present?
- Is she satisfied with both herself and him? Does he read and accept her satisfaction in him?
- Does she seek to impress him or for him to impress her?
- Does she avoid whiny and complaining chatter? She fair minded as opposed to seeking equality in all that she manages?
- Does he help her with big things? Or just little things? How does she solicit his help, or just wait for him to detect her need and then act?
- Does the good order of her house convince you she had high standards and expectations when he was growing up?
- How much of her childhood influence remains in his adult character? Do you see it when alone with him?
A good movie shows off a mother who does most things right, if you measure her effort by her sons’ resounding goodness. I recommend Gifted Hands, which was made from Ben Carson’s autobiography. Tough moms harden boys into pleasing mom forever, which makes them good men.
Now, ladies, you are much more skilled than I about reading people and situations. My examples above are intended to get you started. There’s a lot more you can discover in the relationship of boyfriend and his mother.
I’m trying to foster this point in your thinking, your man is as good as his mother shaped him in childhood. Some remnants of her effort should be visible when they are together.
If mother didn’t teach him well, he ‘filled out’ his childhood by adapting his character, values, standards, and expectations according to teen peers. He’s no better than his fellow adultolescents. The early and not late childhood foretells a man will qualify as good for a girlfriend aimed at becoming his prospective wife.
The measuring stick that will help serve you is time spent in the company of boyfriend and his mother. If he does propose, you have a good feeling that he will treat you good. Befriend your future mother-in-law, and you’ll earn her help rather than no help or even disdain.