Category Archives: How she loses

2850. Gotta Change My Mind Again

For some months or years I’ve been calling the female the superior sex. It’s close but not accurate enough. Hereafter, I will call it the governing gender.  Governance within relationships, couples, and marriages is more functional, easier for women to grasp the meaning and men to accept, and less argumentative than is ‘superior’. Guy is my name, clarity is my game.


Natural Law: Females capture and keep a man with everything else but sex; success is far more who she is and what she does than what she has or was. So females waste time, waste feminine effort, mislead men, and relinquish the driver’s seat when they attract with sex or program themselves to be sexy.



Filed under courtship, Culture & Politics, Dear daughter, Fickle female, How she loses, Sociology 101

2837. Girls Throw Away the Candy Store — 04: What’s a Girl to Do? I

Sorry, gals, this isn’t very friendly reading but you may find it useful. It’s more a working document.

Quit doing these things: Females are notoriously wrong trying to turn their situation to personal advantage. Here are thirty-four things not to do or females do wrong; no candy here.

  1. She takes offense at her man’s claims that he owns her. That is, she’s his, period, or he expects to leave soon. It’s not her but his nature; if he can’t own something he probably doesn’t want it unless it’s extra appealing and he has to pay just to have it available for his use.
  2. She thinks that she understands men, but she’s not even close. It’s not that a man is more complex than pursuit of sex, he just won’t waste time with a woman for whom he has little respect and no interest in her other qualities, aka virtues when he admires them.
  3. She acts more like a man, which makes her less likeable as a female.
  4. She presumes that she’s virtuous just because of her beliefs or behaviors. (Virtue in a woman is a quality that one man admires, nothing else. Men seek to marry a virtuous woman, so she’s only as marry-able as one man admires qualities in her.)
  5. She competes with men for sex rather than competes with women for the best man (who’s only identifiable by his willingness to forego sex to win her).
  6. She shacks up more easily, as if she’s better off that way. Temporary may have an economic or other advantage but it doesn’t brighten her long-range future.
  7. She tries to be less feminine, when men appreciate femininity for its uniqueness.
  8. She’s far less modest and mysterious, when both modesty and mystery have a holding power on men.
  9. She eagerly deals with men who are less trustful and dependable. Because she doesn’t compete effectively with other women for manly attention, she has to take leftovers.
  10. She ignores the feminine neatness, goodness, and cleanliness that reinforces the female as a stronger, or at least unique, person.
  11. She’s less interested or financially unable to promote her prettiness, which takes away manly interest.
  12. She’s much more likely to accept being a single mom.
  13. She’s more promiscuous out of apparent necessity to attract man or men.
  14. She attracts men for sex rather than for herself.
  15. She values her sexual assets more highly than her strength of character, which is the long term opposite of what makes men admire a woman.
  16. She has little ambition to be a better person; her teen beliefs gratify her sufficiently that she needn’t change.
  17. She bonds with a couple’s first sex together and wrongfully expects the same out of him.
  18. She values today more than her future, which conflicts with her man’s priorities.
  19. She dresses for comfort rather than adding to her attractiveness.
  20. As a teen girl and later as single mom she presumes no responsibility or interest for teaching boys how to be romantic and affectionate.
  21. She provides more sex without obligation in the hope it will work this time.
  22. She competes with her man after she yields first sex to him.
  23. She finds ways to blame men for her social and domestic problems.
  24. She lets herself become less wealthy as woman, wife, and mother and poorer in general except as she’s able to keep her spouse devoted to her.
  25. She’s not grateful for who and what she is, and so her path to happiness is blocked.
  26. She measures her worthiness by what men or a man thinks of her.
  27. She refuses to find comfort and pleasure in herself, and so turns to others to frequently lift her up.
  28. She should reject following the pop culture value system; reject the whole basis that men come first and females are only good for sex.
  29. She should get it out of her head, having a baby to capture a man is stupid to start and foolish in the end; single moms finish on the unhappy side of life.
  30. She should forget one night stands as the way to get a man, much less keep him.
  31. She should quit thinking that in present-day happenings, she should be able to overrule him. His dominance is particularly attached to the decisions he has to make now and today, not next week, month, or year. That’s the female’s domain.
  32. She refuses to let men dominate conversation with sex subjects; she throws marriage into the convo.
  33. She mistakenly thinks that vanity is not good or not for her. Other than vanity, what stimulates a gal to appear more attractive?
  34. She is unwilling to change in order to improve her life. What she has is what she deserves, but it’s a drowning attitude.


Filed under courtship, Culture & Politics, Dear daughter, How she loses

2835. Girls Throw Away the Candy Store — 02: Women Lose, Men Win

So, what is the candy store that girls throw away? It’s the mental place and practice where girls and women shop independently and on their own recognizance for what works best for each, for the just-right connections that enable each to screen, capture, and keep a good man who will help fulfill her girlhood hopes and dreams.

A few decades ago the candy store began to stay open fewer hours and finally closed its doors after several generations of girls successively dropped all reference to lessons learned by their foremothers and took up the adolescent practice that anything goes, which within a few decades converted to anything goes that boys want. In the sixties or seventies, it began from this motto: ‘Don’t trust anyone over thirty.’

We are now six or seven generations deep in teens inventing new ways to live. A new generation emerges every seven or so years as new kids adopt new music, lingo, games, habits, and more adolescent values and expectations to identify them as separate from older siblings. Political social engineering accelerates the internal processes.

Generational traits thus change dramatically every few years. Girls now have little else but to ride the bronco of male dominance at the pleasure of the dominator. IOW, women have given away their ability to indirectly rule over men, so that men no longer get involved to help fulfill girlhood hopes and dreams.

Women are losing and men are winning the social and domestic wars. What else to expect? The loss of respect one gender for the other has reached a low I never witnessed in my life. Rethinking my childhood, the case could be made that each sex respected the other more than itself. The sexes interacted much more pleasantly than today. People got along better, especially couples.

NATURAL LAW: A woman is as happy daily or for life as she is grateful for who she is, what she does, and who she does it with.


Filed under courtship, Culture & Politics, How she loses, sex differences

2834. Girls Throw Away the Candy Store — 01: Opener

These are memories of a hopeless romantic nearing the end of life. My target audience is females of every age. Why did you let go, and why do you now ignore all the beauty in females of every age? In female beauty lies a better life for both sexes, but its naturalness has been lost. Each of you knows you are pretty, but if you don’t promote it no one else will.

You gals are the losers. Men have won plentiful sex, which produces men interested very little in helping females live a good or better life. A man’s primary sex drive is to copulate with every attractive woman once. It compounds as he seeks sex for pleasure with yet another woman, demands that he continually look for the next fix, recover what he may have missed, or pursue some higher thrill. Sex for pleasure is addictive for both sexes, especially for men. No? Then how to explain the dynamic growth of porn that now invades the teen girl subculture alongside the posting habits of social media? What is likely to arise out of that combination?

By the time we finish this series, I hope to open your thoughts—but not your beliefs—this way. Men rule women to the extent that female legs are uncrossed. It’s built inside the male nature that men follow females who refuse to yield first time sex together. What’s the difference? The way they are born different. She instinctively knows to protect her sexual assets and use them to her best advantage. He follows along unwilling to give up chasing what he can’t have without paying her price in obligations to her. He crosses the line of her victory when he discovers that he wants to possess her as his own more than he wants sex with her.

NATURAL LAW: Promiscuous female behavior and ability to hold a man are mutually exclusive.



Filed under courtship, Dear daughter, How she loses, sex differences

2830. Love is Never Enough — 09: Nice Guys Finish Last

Men are designed as producers and women as processors. It means men are doers, they make things happen one thing after another, accomplishment follows accomplishment. Women are endowed with talent to keep the processes of life going, they make things continue to progress by keeping a couple preoccupied with their mutual interest.

Leo Durocher, former manager of the Brooklyn Dodgers baseball team phrased it this way, “Nice guys finish last.” After he married a beautiful movie actress, Lorraine Day, his context was that gals don’t go for nice guys, they go for jerks or bad guys. His philosophy still describes how the sexes are very different, but women don’t want to live with it.

Modern women and mothers keep trying to turn their husbands and sons into nicer men and more female in their beliefs. Their ill-informed ways turn their men and sons into non-producers, irresponsible wimps, and make them unappealing to their own wives and mothers. So, while men may change to accommodate female expectations, in the end women get what they don’t want or can’t keep. The evidence? The large number of single women over 40 years of age.

If a women wants to keep her man, she should promote what he does instead of how she hopes or wants to view him. When doers aren’t producing, they find other women to do it for.


Filed under courtship, Dear daughter, Fickle female, How she loses, marriage

2828. Love is Never Enough — 08: More on the Macro Scale

Females have two forms of love, unconditional mother love and conditional love they like to share and spread among others. A woman expresses both in two ways:

1) She feels good about herself for sharing her love with someone else. It’s a selfish act designed into the female nature to ensure she learns to spread love to others. It also lingers in some women who never learn to be sincere in sharing their love with others.

A woman’s love isn’t worth very much if sharing it only makes her feel good about herself. IOW, selfishness does not lead to happy female.

2) Her expressions of love should make targets like themselves better and feel more worthwhile because of her presence in their lives. Both should benefit, men primarily from her actions, and other women primarily from her words.

She gives her love to someone else and receives the benefits of their loving or at least appreciating her in return; that is, she gives love for benefits in her life. When successful by being unselfish, she feels doubly good about herself; she gives and mostly gets much of what she wants in return. Although originally motivated by selfishness to make sure she shares her love, she learns early in life that she has greater returns on her loving investments by not being selfish.

And then she runs into this paradox of which women seem ignorant.

The paradox lives on daily and eternally. She loves whomever she loves, and it’s the result of her directly sharing her love. He loves what he owns, and her demonstrations of her love are tested against his sense of her duty to his ownership. IOW, her love has to fit in with all the other things he ‘bought’ when he married her.

Certain behaviors are contradictory to husband’s sense of her duty, and men are long on duty. Example: A wife’s yelling, blaming, criticizing, and speaking ill of him to others contradicts her words of love. If she poisons his sense of her duty, how can she keep him satisfied with himself for choosing her?

Regarding him, she loves enough of who he is and what he does to please her that he should love her too. Regarding her, he already loves who she is and what she does, or he wouldn’t be with her. She need only to not contradict it or surprise him with qualities or habits that annoy or are opposite to what he anticipated. But that’s another story.


Filed under Dear daughter, How she loses, How she wins, marriage, sex differences

2826. Love is Never Enough — 06: Love Fades Away

The more I write about love, the more I find women uninterested. I can’t blame them. They don’t want to discover mistakes they may have made, how their heart works, or why they can’t make relationships work successfully. They gain a lot from the mystery that surrounds female love, but it’s an advantage fast disappearing in today’s world.

Unknown or unrecognized by women, female social and domestic influence is deteriorating and sliding toward greater male dominance and an inferior role for females and children. Especially domestically, where love is already shifting from playing the major to playing a minor tune for harmonizing a family. By not understanding how and why their love works, women drift into less and less influence for shaping a brighter future for themselves or ever fulfilling their girlhood hopes and dreams.

If women don’t know the effects of their love on others, they can’t find the gratefulness needed to enable their happiness in later years.

A woman’s love is a mystery to men. They accept and even enjoy it, but it’s a foreign emotion to the male nature. If mothers and teen girls don’t teach boys about love, how to accept it and gain their own advantages with it, then men live by another emotional setup. A combination of motivations where competition, mental and physical dominance, and winning are the main ingredients. Women don’t thrive very well under those conditions. It’s the road to unfriendly male dominance as can be seen in other parts of the world.

The trend for fifty years has been to multiply this effect more with each generation: By design of activists, the public loses its political power, and women lose much more than men. Why? Because love has been removed from the political equation by antagonizing men against women and their main influence, love.

With Christianity under attack, the love of women is too. You can see it in everyday America. Fewer and fewer women attend church to refresh their ability to love. A woman’s love just doesn’t mean what it used to in terms of women getting their way, getting what they want or expect, teaching boys about the need to love, and especially earning the respect of men when trying to form up as more than temporary couples.

Men don’t know or do love unless females teach them and make them like it. At post 2824 I described all love as beginning in the female heart. If it emanates there, what are the ingredients and how do they differ woman to woman? And how does love spread among men? What reflects outwardly that convinces a man to live within the boundaries of one woman’s love and even duplicate some of it in his life? What stimulates men to also love and work to a woman’s advantage? What stimulates men to have kinder hearts and be attentive, loyal, and lovable to others, such as children, neighbors, and work mates? Those functions of love are not embedded in the male nature; women put them there by example.

I for one think we need to answer such questions, if women are to understand what they are losing, which is the political influence of love. The loss of which denudes women of personal influence they need to earn male respect and face off successfully against male dominance. It’s a dribble-down effect, and what changes politically encloses the personal, especially for the physically weaker sex.


Filed under courtship, Dear daughter, How she loses, marriage, sex differences, Sociology 101