I screwed up the first posting of 2800. It’s revised with the duplicates of the previous posting replaced with new items 34-40. Thanks to Lioness for the tip.
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If following her nature, a woman wants a good man as she defines good. In today’s social and domestic marketplaces, both a clear definition and good men are absent. According to women, that is. Men will argue the contrary all day long, but they neither make it clear nor right.
An old maxim says, he will treat you like he treats his mother. Keep that thought in mind, as I think you should spend more time in the company of your dates and their mothers together and even separately if your man is not available.
On her turf, his turf, and even your turf, check out how treats her. Then take it to the next level. Analyze specifics such as these examples:
- Does he listen attentively to her? What techniques does she use to capture and hold his attention?
- Does she wait at doors for his opening of them? Hold the car door? How else does she show her respect of him?
- Is his respect of her so sincere that it would happen even if you were not present?
- Is she satisfied with both herself and him? Does he read and accept her satisfaction in him?
- Does she seek to impress him or for him to impress her?
- Does she avoid whiny and complaining chatter? She fair minded as opposed to seeking equality in all that she manages?
- Does he help her with big things? Or just little things? How does she solicit his help, or just wait for him to detect her need and then act?
- Does the good order of her house convince you she had high standards and expectations when he was growing up?
- How much of her childhood influence remains in his adult character? Do you see it when alone with him?
A good movie shows off a mother who does most things right, if you measure her effort by her sons’ resounding goodness. I recommend Gifted Hands, which was made from Ben Carson’s autobiography. Tough moms harden boys into pleasing mom forever, which makes them good men.
Now, ladies, you are much more skilled than I about reading people and situations. My examples above are intended to get you started. There’s a lot more you can discover in the relationship of boyfriend and his mother.
I’m trying to foster this point in your thinking, your man is as good as his mother shaped him in childhood. Some remnants of her effort should be visible when they are together.
If mother didn’t teach him well, he ‘filled out’ his childhood by adapting his character, values, standards, and expectations according to teen peers. He’s no better than his fellow adultolescents. The early and not late childhood foretells a man will qualify as good for a girlfriend aimed at becoming his prospective wife.
The measuring stick that will help serve you is time spent in the company of boyfriend and his mother. If he does propose, you have a good feeling that he will treat you good. Befriend your future mother-in-law, and you’ll earn her help rather than no help or even disdain.
Her Highness Magnolia inspired this long overdue post.
Q. Her question: “In WWNH you describe our nature “in the raw.” I have a question about men. Does a man in [his male nature] believe that he has a right to a woman’s body (any woman, even a stranger) that he can do as he pleases?”
A. Yes it’s embedded as a sprig of male dominance, but don’t read too much into it. The most likely outcome lies with your term “believe.” Men believe what they figure out better than what they are told. Modern men are told legally and politically that they have no uninvited access to the female body. Belief spreads from the pressures.
Much more importantly, however, his so-called ‘right’ is susceptible to the influence of the superior gender, which has more than enough ability to neutralize it. Men are dominant, but in the world of competition before a man conquers a woman, men are vulnerable to relationship expertise and female determination about right and wrong. That is, before individual conquests, women reign with control of what men want the most.
It’s much easier to believe than what women tell men in legal and political terms. In a unique contrast, men have the physical and mental strength to get their way. But women gang up and get their way by making men dance the female tune, namely he has no inherent right to a woman’s body.
But once she yields conquest, he reigns and she has no authority left to compete on the matter. She learns to cooperate and hopes he will treat her rightly. With conquered women who learn to cooperate, men have less reason to enforce their way. They lean more toward cooperation and more easily follow female expectations.
Each sex has only one distinctly different, inborn, lifetime, and primal urge that constantly pressures men and women to interact together. Combined and with little else, those two motivational forces are capable of perpetuating the species,which seems to be a necessary outcome whether designed by God or and sought by Nature.
Men are born with the motivational appetite to spread their seed. Particulars aren’t specified, just spread it. Women inherit mother love upon giving birth, which is the primal urge to care for the children that result from males spreading their seed. Again particulars aren’t specified as we are all free will individuals. Thus, without other motivational drives, homo sapiens is perpetuated in the simplest fashion. It’s a self-perpetuating ‘human engine’ and little else is needed; men screw, women nurse, and life continues.
Both sexes are born with free will and the desire to get their way among others. This is the chicken: Competitive fires are fueled by mothers, girls, bachelorettes, and wives getting their way by dissuading men from doing as they please with females. This is the egg: Men yield to female expectations in exchange for what females have and women are willing to trade for civilization, peace, and help raising kids.
With that behind us, your question can be answered with common sense. Does the urge to conquer women authorize men to have their way? Yes! In the absence of civilized order and peace, how else can a man be effective, live out his primary purpose in life?
To change Yes to No is the perfect invitation. Mothers civilize boys, girls tame adolescents, wives domesticate husbands, and all females rein in male aggression, train men, and expect men to provide and protect against always getting their own way with females. Men are conditioned to accept no access rights, because they are rewarded with frequent and convenient sex at the discretion of individual females.
IOW, all women have a say in preventing men from having their way with females.We call it civilization. Society is what we do. Culture is why we do what we do. Consequently, either women reign over cultural values, standards, and expectations that guide all of us, or men have their way even with strangers. It’s a great master plan that women have to bring down to the individual level. Unfortunately for modern females, old school did it better than nowadays.
Men are not naturally romantic. Except when forced to honor females with manly spell-binding joy, romance to males means foreplay or prelude to it. If not ‘trained’ to habitually romance her before marriage, he won’t do it afterward and will probably be short on intimacy after sex.
Boys first learn romance by watching father affectionately romance mother without sexual implications. Later, they learn from girls who inspire manly romance by withholding foreplay and from women by withholding sex.
Women expect men to be more romantic, but romance slows a man’s urge to merge. He expects to romance a woman to the extent that she requires for him to initiate foreplay or sex.
Dad asked me to post a quick status update. He has been re-admitted to hospital for a pulmonary condition that relapsed from a few weeks ago. Looks like a bit of surgery tomorrow to try and correct. Please send prayers upward or wishes his way.
Sir Guy and Guy Jr.
This is Guy Jr. My father has recently had some significant health issues and might likely be out of pocket for a while longer. Never fear, however, during his recuperation he tells me he has a number of new, exciting thoughts to share with all of you and will be back ASAP.
Thank you for all your support of WWNH and please keep Sir Guy in your prayers. These have become challenging times for us.
All the best to you all on behalf of Sir Guy,
Anticipating a wet holiday weekend, I take a break. The following amuses me every time I come across it.
HOW DRY IS IT IN TEXAS? (Not original but I lost the source.)
A friend from Rockwall said he killed a mosquito that was carrying a canteen.
A man from Odessa said the chicken farmers were giving the chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying hard-boiled eggs.
At Lake Texhoma, someone caught a 28 lb. catfish that had ticks on it.
One year during my life in Plano, Texas, friends reported these events:
- a fire hydrant was seen bribing a dog,
- Baptists began baptizing with sprinkle bottles,
- Methodists began using wet-wipes,
- Presbyterians gave out rain-checks, and
- Catholics prayed for the wine to turn back into water.
Other than that, living in Texas was great.