Tag Archives: conquering spirit

2093. Compatibility Axioms #511-520


NOTE: A man’s domains are those relationship issues about which he’s the boss, near-boss, thinks he should be, or aspires to be that eminent person. Either as he sees it or concludes from daily negotiations or haggling with his woman. [189]

511. It’s the territorial imperative in coupledom. She shows disrespect when she invades his domains and signals his insignificance when she succeeds.[189]

512. Disrespect shown to a man piles up to kill his love. Insignificance piles up to end his presence. [189]

513. Symptoms of less love and his impending departure can be found in less interest for fulfilling his woman’s hopes and dreams. [189]

514. When women try to lead in masculine domains, much as feminists do, men find bigger or better ways to stay ahead. This leads to put downs, mistreatment, and an ‘I’ll show you’ spirit. Examples: rap music, family abandonment, and abusiveness. [189]

515. Relationship success comes from making daily decisions that build mutually recognized and honored domains for each spouse. An organization cannot long function under two equal CEOs. [189]

516. Men appreciate cheap and easy sex. But, they don’t much value unearned gifts. Such female behavior cheapens a man’s conquering spirit. It denies him opportunity to prove his manly worth by other than sexual performance. [190]

517. A woman’s eagerness for the excitement of sex make her appear too loose for a man to expect her faithfulness.  [190]

518. Being given what a man expects to be a challenge turns him toward other challenges. [190]

519. The female nature intuitively guides mature girls and women away from the extreme behavior of cheap and easy sex. They know something else is much better for them. [190]

520. Though not as women expect, casual sex energizes men. If she’s that free and easy, then he can pursue the next score, notch the bedpost again, and go after more. [190]

 

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808. Gender Differences Revisited — Group R


  1. Couples shack up to test for sexual compatibility. Women deceive themselves. Men applaud themselves.
  2. Men presume commitment but women don’t. Women need assurance and daily confirmation, if confirmed only by themselves.
  3. Women expect men to be romantic, but romance slows a man’s conquering spirit. Men are as romantic as a woman requires before accepting foreplay or intercourse.
  4. Both wives and husbands resent facing previous sex partners of their spouse. Wife loathes the other woman. Husband holds animosity for his wife.
  5. Women crave frequent little things and remembrances to remind that their man is thinking of them. Men don’t.
  6. Men depart a relationship with hope for a less involved one the next time. Women depart a relationship with conviction she can do better the next time.
  7. Women easily expand their thinking from ‘me’ to ‘you and me’ and then to ‘us’ and even to ‘you come before me’. (It brightens her future.) Men are slow to grow that way and also backslide easily. (His interest lies with the present.)
  8. Women easily love a man, but men love their work—or whatever they have to do to prove themselves to themselves.
  9. To women, and mother knows best, a person’s character is more important than what that person does. Men lean toward the opposite.

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560. Colors Bright, Attractive Sight


Following the sexual and cultural revolutions that began in the Sixties, slothful, sloppy, weird, and wild-colored clothing exploded and raced through successive generations. Each generation lost a little more interest in appearing well-dressed. Slowly, wild colors faded and dull and black became fashionable, men made careless dress popular, and girls followed suit. The drug culture accelerated and worsened everything.

The color black settled in as fashion leader and masculine standard. Girls followed men in mores, attire, and drugs. Now, not only is black fashionable, but so are slothfulness, sloppiness, dull t-shirts, fat-highlighting tightness, and hair so unattended that it appears dirty. Modern females forfeit these realities:

  • Bright-colored clothes with complimentary shaping and accessories sell feminine attractiveness. Such things express greater female uniqueness. They also broaden female competition by emphasizing each female’s attributes and disguising whatever she wishes to hide.
  • Appearing that way makes men mentally probe behind the frontage, explore her mystery, take measure of her as person rather than sex object.
  • But such dressing and grooming has even greater value: She feels better about herself. And, no better reason exists for brightening her appearance.
  • In the final analysis, women feel as good about their selves as they prettify their selves. Black informal doesn’t do it. Bright casual, colorful informal, and black formal do it.

When women dress to please and feel good about their selves instead of trying to impress men, they ‘own’ the battleground. Her array of attributes and attitude introduce natural but effective resistance to his conquering and dominating spirit.

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513. Exes with Benefits? — I


A couple breaks up without bitterness or maybe with it. They retain interest in each other, or they don’t. Marriage or remarriage enters her mind as wish, desire, or possibility or perhaps not. The critical question: Will they under any condition have sex together after breakup?

Restored sexual privileges work against permanent reconciliation. Unless they both change, they will return to more of whatever they had before breakup. The ex with benefits has little reason and no incentive to upgrade from whatever he—or she—was before.

It’s a one-way street to new relationship, and she has to direct traffic. She has to willfully impose new expectations and standards about sex.

©     She can change fairly easy, but he won’t, except as he confronts new mystery surrounding barriers to sex previously ‘owned’.

©     Chastity, imposed solely because of break up, causes mystery. It’s another aspect of feminine mystique that makes men want to join up with a woman’s interests.

©     Dedication to chastity earns greater respect and self-respect for her. Respect being the foundation of a man’s love and dependent on her self-respect, higher standards regarding sex increases her stature in his eyes two different ways.

©     Chastity incentivizes men, especially exes. He can’t believe she can resist him after what they had together. He knew her hot buttons before, but what happened? How come he’s suddenly not good enough? 

©     She’s different, unreadable, and willful, which earns newfound respect as long as she doesn’t explain, complain, or let her thoughts be known about the whys and wherefores of it all. One exception: next.

©     Chasteness is valuable, and she owes it to her husband. Whoever the next one is, he’s worth it. That’s all ex should know. So what if she didn’t feel that way earlier in life. She now lives a new life with license to be different.

©     Chastity reenergizes his conquering spirit. This makes him choose. Conquer her again, or go elsewhere? The greater challenge lies with her, a known entity now filled with unconquerable unknowns. It’s unmanly not to rise to the competitive challenge she throws at him. Can he leave such a puzzle unsolved and unconquered?

©     His conquering spirit reenergizes his drive to prove himself worthy, so he chases her. As he gives more and more of himself, he slowly restores the conviction that he can’t live without her. (The movie Fireproof exhibits this natural phenomenon that love comes from giving, but most men must be taught, and it should start in toddlerhood.)

Chastity is not foolproof, but the odds favor reconciliation much more than granting benefits to any ex.

The next post in this series describes outmaneuvering his sexual imperative.

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415. Virtual Virginity #20


     Virtual virginity works like this: A woman persists in remaining chaste with a particular man. His conquering spirit forces him to continually ponder and try to improve his chances.

Men respect chaste females, so he judges her as actual or near-virgin from the virtuous behavior he sees. Provided she keeps her sexual history secret, he’s forced to guess at her sexual experience.

The longer and more persistently she prevents his conquest—but is able to keep him interested in her—the more credit he gives her for chasteness. His conquering spirit tells him that other guys were unsuccessful, because even he cannot score, and he’s the most deserving of them all.

Virtual virginity enables a woman to pressure a man into deciding whether he wants her, or he’s only after sex with her. It empowers her to govern their relationship agenda, separate the worthy man from the unworthy, recruit the best applicant to help fulfill her hopes and dreams, and save her greatest asset for his reward when their relationship goes her way.

Men value virginity and near-virgins, because it symbolizes they go where other men have not. He’s driven by his competitive nature. Her apparent purity confirms his potential as winner, and this makes him stay around for his crowning.

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331. Do women know jack about Jack? — Part 19


♂♥ The male nature and conquering spirit tends to be uncivilized, ggressive, and even violent when challenged. Males are made otherwise by mothers nurturing in the weans, fathers leading in the tweens, and girls teaching in the teens. Adult women live with the consequences.

♂♥ It takes the female gender to tame and harness the male gender for brightening the future for individual women and children.

♂♥ If he expects her to share the financial load when dating, he’s not really into her and his attentions will not likely become what she wants to see. (If she wants to share the financial load, gift him some money divorced from dating expenses to “spend as he chooses.” What he does with it will tell her about his character and her importance in his life. She can then decide about their roles and future together.)

♂♥ Men bond better from a long process to get her into bed, than they do from conquest itself. The former requires investment of himself, the latter does not.

♂♥ His devotion reflects emotional fidelity. His commitment lacks that depth of meaning.

[Eighteen other posts about Jack are listed in the Content page at the top.]

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276. Wham, bam, thank you, ma’m! — Post 3 of 5


SUBJECT: Men are not considerate of her sexual wants, needs, and desires. Granted, they should be, but….

♀♥♂  Nurturing him won’t work; it’s demeaning. Teaching him won’t work; it’s humiliating. Coaching might work; good coaching shows him respect and recognizes his dignity and importance otherwise.

♀♥♂  Men heavily experienced in sexual encounters tend to ignore the smaller details. It’s too easy and habit forming to conquer and go elsewhere. So, coaching such a man requires much more adroitness than with most.  

♀♥♂  If premarital, she’s in charge of changing both his conquering spirit and defusing his conqueror’s rights. Virtual virginity lays good groundwork. (See post 248 et al.)

♀♥♂  She craves attention and affection from her man to acknowledge her importance to herself. Her sexual preferences and expectations are less important. Given that men have affection delivery disorder, progress made toward fulfilling her basic needs may provide better results than complaining about his sexual approach. (See post 3 regarding his and her A.D.D.) 

Men should consider her wants, needs, and desires. As we have seen, however, love and poor choices often interfere.

[More on this subject appears in posts 271 and 266 and follows at two future posts.

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