Tag Archives: constructive criticism

2074. Compatibility Axioms #481-490


All that follows below is based on the natures of men and women as they are born. Women have to figure out what’s best for them given the lessons they have learned in life and the relationships they enter.

481. Easy sex might promote shack up and even short marriage within the mind of her boyfriend. But, it won’t stir up the foundational respect needed for enduring love that survives the inevitable fading of romantic love. [171]

482. Girls cheapen themselves to attract a boyfriend, and success builds habit. Men don’t value cheap women except for sex, which forces such girls as women to bounce from one man to another. [171]

483. Men have access to too much easy sex to endure one female’s nagging and attempts to change him or his life. As one man said of his ex: “Somewhere, someplace, some guy is tired of her s_ _ _!” [171]

484. Promiscuity fends off men, not for her as temporary sex partner but as keeper. Encountering her past lovers threaten him after conquest but doesn’t discourage him before.  [171]

485. To prove their newfound sexual freedom, women abandon the greatest strategy for attracting, capturing, and keeping a man. That is, no sex without devotion and deep obligation developed and proven over an extended courtship (especially including fellatio). [171]

486. When she chases a man for his looks, she wants to impress him and be liked. However, he receives the message that she’s available and disposable. [172]

487. Go after the hunk and dislike what follows the bunk. After she beds the hottie, she’s as disposable as a nottie. Hunks learn early that they get what they want without giving of themselves. So, they keep getting and getting, which calls for someone else. [172]

488. A husband views his wife’s ‘constructive criticism’ this way: “I know it’s good for me. I just can’t stand so much goodness.” [172]

489. If he does not see that she needs him, he will become temporary. Her expressions of affection make her feel good, but they do not show her need for him as do her respect, gratitude, and dependence. [172]

490. Men don’t respect desperate people. A desperate woman is not a keeper and is dumpable without much remorse. [172]

 

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1983. Compatibility Axioms #441 — Relationship Malpractice


441. The big things don’t hold a man, such as sex, feeding, love, likeability, respect, devotion. The accumulation of little malpractices causes his interests in her to seep away through cracks she causes with disrespectful and ungrateful incidents. Such as:

  • He never measures up to her expectations that are so heavily weighted down with feminist theory and dogma. [150]
  • She values the feminine-like side of his personality more than his masculine persona. Being thoughtful, pleasant, and accommodating outweighs his producing, providing, protecting, and problem solving. [150]
  • Her private time is respected. His gets interrupted. [150]
  • She supervises the Honey-do list so closely as to be offensive. [150]
  • She corrects him as if scolding a child. [150]
  • She dislikes and tries to correct his masculine expressions and manliness. [150]
  • She interferes with his way of doing things, as if he isn’t handy and needs her input for everything. [150]
  • She excuses her frequent criticism by calling it ‘constructive’. [150]
  • She shows signs that she appreciates him, but only when things go her way. [164]
  • She makes her nesting more important than his ego. For example, her drive for fashion in the home outweighs to a fault his desire for functionality. [164]

More to follow.

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1442. Guy’s Golden Nuggets


I posted 1440—Guy’s Favorite Post without being asked about my favorite. Her Highness Linda wondered are “there are other questions we should be asking you?” So, I developed this post to intrigue inquiring minds.

Following below is a dozen of Guy’s Golden Nuggets for sustaining lifetime marriage. I make bold claims and often familiar statements. I ask you for questions to help me highlight the relevance and wisdom of each bullet and above all make them more clear to women.

  1. Without begrudging her spouse his freedom or his ignoring her, she develops the ability—but not the habit—of patiently and pleasantly living separate lives under the same roof until disruptions fade.
  2. Women expect their love, affection, loyalty, and faithfulness will breathe liveliness into both husband and marriage. It’s not enough. Wives also need the ability and firm determination to overlook his shortcomings without trying to change him. It’s a risk wives accept or later they face the risk of losing him.
  3. Marriage is primarily about the wife (aka relationship expert) managing the risks to harmonize each day and thereby brighten her future.
  4. Constructive criticism is neither constructive nor wanted.
  5. Out of fear of losing, men won’t and don’t compete with their woman. When pushed into it, husbands exercise their male dominance beyond what the wife finds acceptable. So, what she gets is what she provoked (e.g., by getting in his face).
  6. It’s the best harmonizing ‘glue’ wife has at her disposal. The absence of continually bombarding him with prickly and negative irritants, disapprovals, and criticisms. Good intentions count for naught.
  7. The big, positive, and attractive emotions that women love to use and fulfill—love, affection, loyalty, faithfulness—have limited bonding and holding power. A man comes very slowly and always indirectly to appreciate them.
  8. Wives deal with husbands as their experience dealing with other men has taught them. Their father’s guidance helps but one or two boyfriends do not provide enough experience.
  9. Husband refuses to participate when wife initiates specific competition this way: Nagging indirectly shames and directly challenges his conviction of his dominance, judgment, self-image, self-worth, and rightness of having married her. His responding silence should wave a large red flag but wifely commitment to change her man or make him mind her makes her color blind.  
  10. Ignorant wives keep trying to inflict guilt on husband in hopes he will react as women do. But he doesn’t react that way. The door to his guilt locker is locked from the inside, and he intends to keep it that way.
  11. If her marriage appears to be going awry, look for how she changed away from being the girlfriend, fiancé, attractive woman, understanding friend, sex magnet, and barrel of fun that he married.
  12. A wife dresses carelessly or sloppily for comfort or to copy the males’ carelessness of appearance. She exudes subliminal messages, such as, “What people and even my husband think of me today is not important.” Poor wifely appearance both at home and in public signifies low self-esteem, poor self-image, extreme self-centeredness, and weak relationship expertise.

Take your pick. Whether you favor, dispute, or just choose to comment, all questions to clarify any bullet will be appreciated.

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153. Do women know jack about Jack? — Part 8


♀ Wives want to be shown more affection, but husbands stay focused and specialize on their own importance. Men must be trained to show affection. (If his parents didn’t do it in childhood, he’s not likely to improve himself very much in adulthood, except when a long, sex-free courtship requires that he develop new habits for displaying affection to her.)  

♂ Easy marks for conquest earn high marks for dumping to the ex lane.

 ♂ As husbands see it, anger and aggressiveness are male traits, and a wife should be above such offending behavior. (This makes feminine charm, patience, and indirectness highly effective at harmonizing a pair of self-interested people into mutual interest. Of course it’s not fair, but it exploits both the natural differences between the sexes and her greatest potential.)

♂ The greater her feminine virtue, then the greater his respect and the more likely her future faithfulness to him. Men expect that first, always, and to be obvious in their woman.

♂ A man changes after conquest. By joining the conquered, she loses exceptionalness to him. (It doesn’t mean that she loses everything, just that he views and values her differently, and she must change accordingly to hold him. Unfortunately, how he changes is unpredictable, because his agendas remain hidden until he’s devoted and not just committed to her.)

♀ If he’s after sex more than her, she’s temporary until the next sex target comes along and maybe sooner.

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7. Do women know jack about Jack? —Part 1


Testosterone hardens a male’s head and heart for survival early in life. A good woman can soften his hard-headedness after many years as a couple. Testosterone fades in old age and softens his heart. Feminist theory, propaganda, and pressures try to soften his head and heart before Nature allows, and so men rebel and women pay the price. When men don’t highly value integrity in others, they likely lack it themselves. This makes vow-keeping much more difficult for such men.

Men have little natural interest in making things safer, until they foresee or face endangerment. They also have little interest in family compatibility, except as it first makes their job more significant as producer, provider, protector, problem-solver.

She offers her honor. He honors her offer. Men thrive with on her and off her. 

For a man to respect a woman, love is the only legitimate reason for her having sex with another man. The new raunch culture practice of sealing male friendships with sex puts participating young women out of bounds for winning a man’s enduring love. He’s cuckolded by her every male friend, whether she actually did it or not.

Modern women avoid femininity, provide pre-marital sex, act like guys, smother their man with devotion, and try to appear ordinary. Men marry them, but they don’t stay married. Men don’t marry guys, and they stay with the woman they consider extraordinary female.

A man stays with a woman when she fulfills the image and expectations he held before they married. If she changes, as most women do, her surprises register unpleasantly, irritatingly, or worse.

To a man, his woman’s constructive criticism is still nagging.

A man’s devotion dies, when he’s not appreciated in an upbeat fashion for who he is and what he does.

If shack up or marry up is not the man’s idea—absorbed, intertwined, and integrated with his dreams about her and jointly achieving goals with her over a considerable length of time—then he will not long honor whatever relationship arrangement they enter. Theirs will be temporary, if she talks him into any kind of relationship.

Feminine mystique attracts men and holds their interest. An air of secrecy and generally being hardtoget draws men into a woman’s aura of charm. It keeps her in charge and puts men on the defensive. It’s the opposite of her chasing him, and it forces each man to prove his worth to her—if he chooses to pursue her.

When he perceives charming but strong resistance to his first priority, sexual conquest, it pushes him deeper into the role of seller, which proportionally reinforces her as the buyer.

Female modesty tames males. It’s a woman’s greatest counterbalance to male domination. Modesty keeps men at a distance and empowers a woman to avoid and prevent embarrassment. It keeps men on the defensive about female sensibilities, which weakens male domination.

The foundation of a man’s love is respect for a woman. Romantic love, mostly based on infatuation and lust, does not require a man’s respect. Plus, romantic love fades after a year or two. Enduring love, if it’s to replace the romantic kind and not also fade away, requires his respect that she earned early and continues to maintain.

Feminine adherence to moral standards helps earn masculine respect. Moral standards serve women and children predominantly but only when women promote and push morality such that it suppresses extreme male domination and aggression and violence.

Female-designed customs and manners calm men. By women insisting on and upholding social and domestic standards, men learn they must please women to enjoy feminine endorsement.  

Hard-headed feminine gentleness beguiles males. It adds to both her mystique and influence. (Gentleness is a great feminine strength far removed from a weakness.)

Respect to, gratefulness for, and dedication pledged to and kept with one man inspires masculine fidelity, but it doesn’t guarantee it. As hunter-conquerors, men can be tamed, civilized, domesticated and acclimated to monogamy when women lead by example. Of course it’s not fair, but men have little interest partnering with only one woman—unless women sell and reward them for both husbanding and fathering.

Virginity is under valued by modern women. Women desire men that know how to satisfy them sexually. With her, experience counts. Men desire females that other men have not had. With him, it’s beating out all those other guys. So, it’s not virginity so much to men as it is her sexual inexperience by which he can measure his competitive prowess.

Men expect this first in a relationship: a cooperative and helpful rather than a competitive and offending spirit. Next, they expect respect and gratitude for who he is and what he does. The former invites him to partner, the latter holds him as partner.

Modest and celebratory apparel crowns pregnant women as heroes to men. T-shirt wearing, beer-belly pregnant women destroy their attractiveness. They send a loud message that they don’t give a damn whether others admire them as mother and him as father. In fact, they make their man look like a chump—his woman brags of what she sees as ugly, and men see as wonderful prospect for the future. 

 

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