Tag Archives: cooperate

567. Sex differences explain men — Chap. 32


♦       As women age, their ratio of testosterone to estrogen rises, so they get more authoritative. As men age, they get less aggressive, because their ratio diminishes.

♦       In war men don’t fight for home and country, they fight for the men alongside, military buddies. In wartime women fight for home, family, and beliefs.

♦       Men don’t respect women acting like males. Women don’t respect men acting like females.

♦       Men offer advice cautiously. They can’t stand to be ignored or disregarded. Women offer advice freely. They’re not offended when it goes unheeded or ignored.

♦       She wants to look pretty. He wants to appear in control.

♦       Women are more group-oriented and men more individualistic.

♦       Women expect peace without having to fight for it. Men know they must fight for it.

♦       Men physically defend themselves. Women mentally defend themselves.

♦       The male nature competes but cooperates under pressure. The female nature cooperates first but easily competes under pressure if risks are not threatening to kids or family.

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517. The ABCs with C-words about Sex


 Sex either enables or disables the compatible merging of the male and female natures into a successful relationship. Not coitus but the before and after expectations. Sex differences make the difference.

COMPETITION—The Male Strength

Men are made to compete with men. (Disregard table and fun games here.)

Except when trying to conquer her, a man avoids hard-headed competition with a woman. Women too easily outtalk or outsmart men seeking to conquer them. So, men conclude, it’s best to avoid competition on other matters. The prospects of conquest warrant head-to-head mind games, but nothing else.

Men don’t want a woman to think he can’t hack whatever comes up, so losing mind battles reveals incapacity. It can too easily demo some bit of insignificance, which he fears.

Pushy male dominance is a surefire way to avoid competing with her, so he uses it to stop discussion, squash dissent, and avoid loss of face. It’s his nature, not the woman. (Male subordinates of female bosses often favor indifference rather than compete to win a point or advise her.)  

After conquest, he expects sex to be cooperative and not competitive. Why not? Her nature favors the former over the latter. But that’s not the whole story.

COOPERATION—The Female Strength

Men do whatever women require in order for men to have frequent and convenient access to sex. When Womanhood speaks, men pay attention. If a woman sets standards and high expectations, a man will step up, elevate his effort, and smooth his attitude—but only before conquest.

Beyond that turning point, he expects routine access to sex with her; it was the target of his natural conquering spirit. Conqueror’s rights are an intrinsic primal urge, hardwired and hormonal. Consequently, he can’t stop his expectations; she certainly can but at risk of losing him.

A man will not long play games or otherwise compete for sex with a woman he has conquered. If she persistently uses sex to get her way, he will rebel quietly, privately, noisily, or physically. Whichever way he chooses, he won’t tolerate it very long and soon seeks another woman.

It’s especially true in marriage. He paid the ultimate price to have frequent and convenient access. When she starts to pull back or shy away, his competitive spirit energizes him, because she challenges his conqueror’s right. So, he pushes for and expects easier access or unlimited sex to prove that he’s right. This makes her resent, resist, rebel, and retaliate in order to restore her self-respect. He pushes harder, she does too, and they start living separate lives under the same roof, or worse. 

Compatibility has one switch for sex. They compete before conquest. They cooperate after.

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134. Dark Side of Feminism—Part 9


Modern women drive their man away. They adopt and follow feminist values about and expectations for dealing with men. The effect is that women cooperate with each other for moral support and compete with their man for dominance. In other words, they try to pressure the masculine Nature to change. 

Competitive spirit and pressures push women to act more like men—♫ I can do anything he can do better.

♂♀ If he can provide and protect a family, she can too—so he lets her do it alone.

♂♀ If he can flout his masculinity in revelry, she can join as one of the guys—and he treats her no better than just another guy.

♂♀ If he can act financially irresponsible, she can too—and even spend faster.

♂♀ If he can endanger family solidarity, she can too—and seek revenge by cheating on him.

In the process, she acts like a man. This makes her think like a man. Or, vice versa. And this transmutes into loss of the female genius every couple needs to build longevity together.To avoid mental conflict, they abandon natural female traits. This further weakens influence with a man. Romantic love fades faster, marital vows shrink in importance, and men get itchy to make another go of it with someone else.

The culprit is the feminist challenge to male dominance, the hormone hurricane that separates the sexes. The challenge requires outside help in the form of politics and public pressure to help prove women right and men wrong. Thus, Feminism leads women away from their natural strengths, relationship genius, and ability to identify a good man, screen until he’s Mr. Good Enough, and upgrade him after years of marriage into the Right Man.

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129. Dark Side of Feminism—Part 08


  • A feminist creed: Don’t listen to what men have to say about the female sex. It’s understated, and men are the enemy.
  • Feminists blame character flaws for men that cheat. But without women to provide sex to married men, pressures mount for husbands to remain faithful whether they like it or not.
  • Feminists insist on equal sharing of housekeeping and childcare responsibilities. The best intentions to equalize workload weakens mutual devotion, because sustaining equality is both friction-causing and impossible to achieve.
  • Feminists listen only to women about Feminism. They ignore its impact on the male nature and blame men for not acting as women say they should, would, or could.  
  • Feminists move females away from old school maturity-before-sex in favor of new school sex-before-maturity. Men win, women gain sexual freedom and lose the ability to hold onto one man.  
  • Feminism teaches women to rationalize a superior role for females, celebrate their independence from men, and compete against their man. This justifies a self-centered competitive rather than an us-centered cooperative spirit. Filling such a role belittles a man’s sense of significance, the loss of which is his greatest fear with any woman.
  • Feminists actively honor sexual freedom. Men relish the proliferation of uncommitted sex, but the Marrying Man seeks something very different.
  • Feminists claim female independence as a woman’s right. Men let them have it and welcome the consequent watering down of family responsibility.

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87. Bright side of Femininity—Part 2


Reorganized, clarified, and reissued as #1831.

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66. Hard-hearted Hannah


A woman easily kills her relationship when she exhibits female weaknesses that harden her heart for cooperation and soften her head into competing with her man. Weaknesses follow:

♥ Facetiousness prompted by fear of being wrong.

♥ Hatefulness prompted by dislike of herself.

♥ Selfishness never untaught to her in childhood.

♥ Busyness pursuing her personal rather than their agenda.

♥ Fussiness inspired by desire for perfection.

♥ Bitchiness that flows from envy, jealousy, and similar emotions related to others.

♥ Fearsome brought on by mistakes that she thinks might be repeated endlessly. 

Quarrelsomeness that emerges from her desire to drive their bus.

♥ Untidiness, the nesting merits of which she was never taught in childhood.

♥  Loneliness imagined when he’s not alongside her.

♥ Lonesomeness caused by husband’s absence at work.

♥ Moodiness that flows from inability to control events to her satisfaction.

♥ Carelessness prompted by weak sense of responsibility.

♥ Sloppiness that reflects badly on husband to his friends and competitors.

♥ Phoniness energized by fear of her true character being found out.

♥ Political correctness brought on by sense of being victimized.

♥ Unfaithfulness that boils in oil her man’s sense of significance.

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61. Why he doesn’t hear her—Part II


Men don’t listen to men about dealing with women. It’s a principle that stems from their competitive natures and opposing personas. Each man knows best how he will treat each kind of woman he encounters. If necessary, he’ll fake it until he makes it. Each man expects that ultimately one woman with feminine skills will finally settle him down to his rewards as husband and father.  

Men don’t listen to women about dealing with women. Again, it’s the masculine nature, but the unstated messages he hears and the unintended consequences mislead women.

She says, “You are not as courteous as I desire,” and he also hears “…and I expect you to change.” Or, she says, “You can do better,” and he hears, “…and you’d better.” Or, she says, “We need to dress up for this affair tonight,” and he hears, “…your wardrobe needs updating.” He hears that she expects him to change. Resistance sets in, and her words don’t register as she intends.

This is especially true, if they’ve had their first sex together. If she’s unconquered by him, however, the effect differs. He hears, he heeds, and he modifies his behavior in whatever way he thinks will advance his agenda for bed time together. He may or may not change to please her or as she hoped. However he changes, spread out over time, will likely become habitual. Long sex-free courtships accumulate more habitual changes that please her.

Men seldom hear what their woman says, unless certain conditions attach to show respect and gratefulness for him and what he does. Examples are described as ‘nessies’ in post #59 and options in #60 below.

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A Guy Note: In this blog it makes no sense to itemize what men should do or be like, or what women expect from their man. No one has correct answers except each woman dealing with each man. It’s always up to her to finely balance and fine tune their respective agendas into their mutual agenda.  

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