I attack the principle of full disclosure but not the details or propriety of disclosing one’s thoughts and feelings to another.
DEFINITION: Full disclosure means baring one’s heart, body, and soul to another under the misapprehension that listener/viewer will value the discloser more highly. It bodes ill for females that do it.
· Women believe that full disclosure helps seal a deal with a man. Probably because they bare their heart and soul to close female friends, some women think men value and process such information the same way. Wrong!
· In fact, females disclose their inner thoughts among female friends. This ability adds to their mystery, because men don’t. But, full disclosure with a man weakens a woman’s mysterious attractiveness. In effect, full disclosure in principle kills her mystery in fact.
· Mystery helps attract a man. If full disclosure short circuits her attractiveness, he loses interest.
· Generally, whether dating, courting, or marrying, the more he discovers and evaluates her worthiness for him, the better for her. Furthermore, a man’s own conclusions are far more convincing than what females tell about themselves. (He doesn’t value words as she does.)
· Much of what women disclose to each other, men don’t even want to hear. Men are judgmental and use details to judge. When he judges her outside his interest in her, she comes up short.
· What she considers valuable to him for dating and in courtship can be quite different from what he values in a prospective wife.
· If she discloses fully to prove that he’s Mr. Right, he’ll lose some interest in pleasing her, much like after his conquest. (Why play harder in a game that you’ve already won?)
· To call him Mr. Right makes him wary. But she shows a darker side; her conviction that he’s Mr. Right promotes an attitude that her hunt is over, and she likely shifts into clinging vine mode. Qualifying him only as Mr. Good Enough avoids that pitfall, because full disclosure is not as appropriate as with Mr. Right.
More shows up tomorrow in the Second Rut.