The male nature—man-think—works like the following when confronted with a woman’s angst about her worthiness to her man.
Every day I figure out more clearly that when a woman asks a man if he loves her, she calls up little but confusion in his mind. Out of that confusion comes a lot of vibes that do not necessarily help a relationship.
She routinely asks, “Do you love me?” without realizing that men just don’t think about love and its meanings the same as women.
- His mind prevents him from calling it love in his heart. As a man, he can’t do all the things that she does to care for and do in her loving of others. He’s nowhere near the caring person she is, and caring is what her love is all about. It’s not his nature, and so he’s caught in a whirl of confusion trying to deal with his favorite woman, when she asks that question so vital to her own well-being.
- He wants to answer but he can’t find sincerity. Love as she knows it does not reside in his heart. He knows that, but also knows that she expects it to be there. He doesn’t want to lie, disappoint, or come up short in her eyes. So, he blurts out “of course” and guilt—from the dishonesty within himself—keeps him from going much further to convince her.
- Trying to be honest, he spouts out whatever is needed to get him clear of the moment. However, sincerity is missing from his response. She senses being somewhat cheated, uncertainty sets in, and she begins to inquire more often. The more often she asks, the worse he feels from inability to be sincere to someone he admires, likes, and appreciates with all his heart.
Now, if she asked ‘do you like me’ she would get several different responses. Probably an excess of affirmatives and, perhaps, more frequent displays of attention, affection, and appreciation. Man-think works well and clearly—easily sincere and honest—when the question is whether someone or something is liked.
Months ago I concluded that love is never enough to hold a couple together as women are prone to believe. I began writing about mutual likeability being the paramount ingredient in a successful relationship. That which I posed above confirms my earlier decisions. Deal with men in likeability rather than love and a woman will find a more accurate path to where she stands with her man.
In short, her just asking a man if he loves her can weaken his dedication to her. How? It weakens his dedication to himself to be honest, which weakens his character, and which undercuts his ability to treat his woman with the highest regard he can muster at any given moment.
To help keep a man honest, sincere, and forthright, never ask him if he loves you. Ask him if he likes you, and—as a woman—you can find out the strength of his sincerity by his actions. In short, for a woman to find the love of a man, she must first be so likeable that he struggles just to be around her. Three little words may satisfy her ears, but his sincerity, honesty, and actions prove his dedication.