Tag Archives: self-confidence

2118. Compatibility Axioms #591-600


591. Unmarried sex causes couples to over-commit and under-connect. [212]

592. Her value continues upward increasingly to every man that chases her, until she yields. People instinctively value more highly what they can’t have than what they gain and then ‘own’. [212]

593. Everybody makes mistakes. Recovery is everything, and virtual virginity enables it for past sexual mistakes/experience. [212]

594. Avoiding life as an ex comes much easier to the woman that elevates and honors her sexual assets even above marriage. [212]

595. By her refusing to have unmarried sex, she forces a man to prove himself worthy of her and capable of fulfilling her expectations for home and family. If it doesn’t work that way, then he’s after sex and not her. [212]

596. Scoring with a hard-to-get woman elevates a man’s sense of significance, but it’s more ego than conviction, more temporary than permanent, more fun than bond. [212]

597. The woman that a man respects and honors adds to his convicted sense of significance, whether they are sex partners or not. That is, he’s more satisfied with himself by treating her more respectably/honorably.[212]

598. Refusing to have sex with an attractive man requires womanly strength of character to keep from turning him off. Hard-headed feminine gentleness helps and self-dedication wins. [212]

599. A woman’s biggest challenge is to keep from being eager or desperate to have a boyfriend, dates, hubby, or sex, or whatever else she thinks she has to have for the short term. [212]

600. Women seek affection and fear abandonment. Uncrossed legs before marriage is not mutually bonding, which short-circuits affection and increases likelihood of being dumped sooner or later.  [213]

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2116. Compatibility Axioms #571-580


571. A woman that appears very ordinary stales fast in the face of erotic scenery outside the home. [203]

572. Men are born hard-headed and hard-hearted. Women are born hard-headed but soft-hearted. It takes years to soften his heart, and her going soft in the head doesn’t help her but stops softening of his heart. Experts aren’t very effective when their thinking goes mushy. [203]

573. Modern women market themselves poorly. They put all their eggs in the advertising basket, use cheap packaging, and ignore product quality. They advertise sex, dress cheaply, groom carelessly, and think and hope that sex will both capture and hold a man. One-night stand, yes! Hold, no! [205]

574. Sexy apparel and exposed skin precisely focuses a man’s interest on conquest. After conquest, he may or may not focus on her other interests. [205]

575. By fishing with sex as bait, she yields dominance and sex to him. This minimizes her negotiating power and puts their future in his hands. [205]

576. Sex needs no advertising. It sells itself, and advertising it cheapens a woman for everything but sex. [205]

577. Women need high quality packaging to project the appearance and confirm the fact of an extraordinary female—the kind to whom men marry and stay married. [205]

578. Regarding her appearance, if she doesn’t protect her self-respect, display self-confidence, and reflect self-esteem, she lacks quality for much more than temporary gigs with men. [205]

579. Modest attire, attractive grooming, and high-standard feminine behavior create a mysterious quality that intrigues men. It elevates a woman toward keeperhood. [205]

580. As women go, so goes society, and feminine mystique, modesty, and morality drive the best bus for females. Exclusively advertising sex makes a woman miss the bus. She’s left behind to get run over by men. [205]

 

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2095. RANDOM THOUGHTS—Group 96


  • Women have pretty much convinced everyone that men are the primary culprits for mucking up relationships. Women are experts on managing relationships but men are not, so even equal blame may not be appropriate.
  • Infatuation is a powerful inducement to do wrong by letting feelings override a woman’s thinking. The infatuated girl or woman too easily disregards or fails to exploit the character shaping and guidance provided by God, modesty, vanity, morality, and the rest of her female nature.
  • Women do not have to embrace the feminist ideology to embrace feminist values. For example, modern women expect or sanction teen sexual activity to attract masculine attention. They let or teach daughters to dress like hookers, show cleavage to match plumber backside exposure, and dress erotically. Boys and men learn to insist on more and more, and females of every age acquiesce. Nowadays, boys exploit girls as friends with benefits. Men grow older eyeballing more and more exposed skin and dreaming wishfully or wistfully about going from older bloom to younger blossom. Compatibility decays further under social pressure to cheat rather than respect one’s mate. [131
  • A connected difference exists and women ignore or miss this point of nature today. Women hug a man to be held. Men hug a woman to kiss or more. Thus, the common practice of everyone hugging everyone confirms the woman’s importance at each man’s expense—he’s challenged. He may feel awkward with self-restraint or thrilled with the feel of the female body.
  • Why don’t women like to be approached or hit on by strange men? They don’t know how to react successfully because they lack self-confidence that arises out of self-respect that arises out of self-gratitude. IOW, they are not grateful for themselves and don’t like to be reminded of what they don’t deserve.
  • Females inherit typical female convictions, motivations, and qualities at birth in many combinations and variations. Each woman is born unique, and men have an endless variety of women in which to find virtue and from which to choose a virtuous mate. IOW, women are born to be virtuous as men define it, and men determine virtue by the unique female qualities they see in each woman. It means that each woman competes against women for virtuous uniqueness in order to have more options to pick and choose the best man for her.
  • Success in marriage depends basically on two factors. 1) She depends on what he does, his actions. On what he does to, for, and about her, which she perceives with her secondary sensor, her eyes. 2) He depends on her words. On what, how, and why she says to, for, and about him, which he perceives with his secondary sensor, his ears. It means success in marriage requires both sexes to pay less attention to their primary sensors. What she hears and what he sees are not the major determinants.

 

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2086. Female Blessings at Birth — 85-87 Plus


The new project seeds continue at the end of each blessing. They are bolded. I cite her blessing as men might see it and add a man’s natural response. Your comments help.

Blessing approval continues. Agree with these?

85. I am grateful to be ‘wired’ this way. When I sit to eat a meal prepared by me or someone else, my mind becomes occupied by more important things than enjoying the food. So I don’t overeat. [Special credit to Marianne S. for her contribution identifying this female blessing that comes with birth. Guy adds: Her mind flashes to other things on her agenda, such as how to 1) brighten the next upcoming event or opportunity. 2) Stimulate conversation that affirms the eaters or whoever fixed the meal. 3) Find gratitude in having family or friends gathered together for a short while. 4) Find pleasure with herself for bringing two or more together. 5) Discourage daughters from eating too much. 6) Jump up to serve others. 7) Enjoy herself for having prepared the food. 8) Enjoy that the males of her family are satisfying themselves with her food, company, or both. 9) Confirm to herself that tomorrow’s schedule will come off better than today’s. 10) And ad infinitum. Consequently, with her mind preoccupied on other than directly pleasing her own taste buds, she eats slowly and lightly and appreciates that it’s normal, that she is made that way. Moreover, preparing food adds to her sense of importance. Eating eagerly and satisfyingly to please her taste buds—as men do naturally—adds to her proportions unnaturally. She inherits at birth the excellent insight and primal urge to enjoy things other than eating at meal time. Thus, the overweight that she sees on herself is a sign of past disregard of her feminine nature, particularly disregard by trying to copy men or compensate for frustration, boredom, or depression by heavy eating. She’s born to be naturally compatible, and changing her bridal shape to something else is unnatural and does not add to husband’s gratitude for their togetherness. Her blessing: She tends to avoid and not become overweight. His admiration: Her convictions guide her well, and I love her more for remaining the woman I married.]

86. I put myself at disadvantage if I approach men of interest first. Something inside disturbs my mind, even though men say they are flattered and other women encourage it. [Special credit to Screamstyle for her contribution identifying this female blessing that comes with birth. Guy adds: Men don’t expect it and don’t respect women that do it. It smacks that she’s desperate, because it brings her out of the cocoon of uniqueness that men like and expect to see. Female desperation discourages his initiative and prevents the development of manly respect. Men expect women to be independent and uniquely self-sufficient, which a man’s nature expects to last until he proactively turns her interests toward him. If she approaches him, she takes away his opportunity to earn her attention, which means he doesn’t much respect whatever attention she gives him. Her approach also takes away his opportunity to admire the effects he expects to produce. Provided, that is, if he’s interested in her for more than sex. Her blessing: She has patience and respect for men to do the right thing correctly. His admiration: She has self-respect, self-discipline, determination, and high expectations and probably high standards. I shall have to try harder.]

87. I am grateful that my instinct leads me to this. The natural organization of relationships calls for ‘us’ to come before him, him to come before me, and we come before others. (I wish that men would learn that part about “us to come before him”. My setting the example doesn’t seem the least bit contagious.) [Guy adds: Men don’t think ‘us comes before him or her, only women think that way. Either she comes before him or he comes before her. (I disregard the unusual in-between balance just to compare the norm.) She comes first means that he’s very devoted to her. He comes first means that he conquered her without investing himself very deeply in the process of respecting her and therefore wanting to please her endearingly. Men don’t love as women do, and women defeat themselves by expecting it. Think of man and man’s best friend. The more he cares for and pleases his dog with both treats and challenges, the more devoted he becomes to the dog. It’s much the same principle in courtship. His actions program his heart. The more he pleases and presents challenges to a woman in ways that satisfy him, the deeper his devotion grows, the more endearingly he seeks to share himself. If a woman seeks to assess a man’s love of her, let her evaluate his dedication to each of these: 1) His respect for her as person and woman (the foundation). 2) His devotion that pleases her according to his tastes and wishes (his investment). 3) His satisfaction with the way she fills her various roles in their life together (his dependence on her). 4) How her presence enlarges his self-confidence including in bed and public (his return on investment). 5) How her presence lifts his spirits and settles his attitudes (reward for good husbanding). Her blessing: She knows how relationships work, she’s the expert. His admiration: She’s wonderful because he doesn’t have to do it.]

As before, mark each item T or F with whatever comment you wish to add.

This is an old subject expressed a new way. The superior sex is the irresistible force pitted against the immovable object, the dominant sex. Men can be moved by one irresistible force: Indirect leadership built around attractiveness and natural blessings that empower women from birth. Men lack such influential abilities.

 

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2081. Love: You Can Do Better At It


“Love is the morning and evening star.” Or so Burt Lancaster preached in Elmer Gantry.

Women love to hear love described in endearing terms with magical qualities. But dreams of devotion to the well-being of someone seem to produce too much modern-day weakening of mutual love. Unintended consequences too often seem to follow a woman’s or mom’s best and most lovable efforts. Within both couples and families, loving relationships crumble too easily. Females continue to lose their ability to tame the male beast, socialize men into domestic prospects, and complete their domestication within the family unit. The main cause follows.

The receiver of love expects to see three ingredients that the giver usually doesn’t consider—respect, trust, and like females for who they are; and respect, trust, and like males for what they do. As those are not felt on the receiving end of a woman’s love, it weakens her importance to objects of her love.

When women feel less important to those around them, they try harder. However, she focuses on making herself important, which doesn’t work. Frustrated, she tries harder but it doesn’t work. Seeking to be important causes her to slide into ever less importance to those around her. It’s selfishness personified to try to convince someone of your importance to them.

Her problem: She loves as she’d like to be loved, which means loved for who she is. She loves without thinking or knowing HOW to show love that is appreciated by love objects.

There is a missing link in the closed loop of mutual love. The primary giver has to set the example and women and moms are the primary givers. The missing link is gratitude and successfully showing love work like this.

She finds gratitude for the respectability, trustfulness, and likeability of those she loves. Regardless of age, even with toddlers. With such gratitude guiding her heart, her expressions of love signal that the loved ones are respected, trusted, and liked. That makes them grateful and their feedback conveys that she’s important to them, which emphasizes her sense of self-importance, which enhances her ability to find more gratitude and thus have her love more appreciated.

Thus, gratefulness for all things, which is the road to happiness, empowers her love in ways that expand her importance. The more important she appears on the radar of her loved ones, the more it confirms their self-respect, -confidence, and -worth, which makes them more grateful for her, which adds further to her self-importance, which intensifies her ability to love more believably.

 

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2069. Female Blessings at Birth — 70-72


We continue the vital list of blessings that women inherit. This is the 24th installment and I’m grateful for your responses. Especially those that signify your agreement or disagreement, T or F.

70. From my earliest days, the mirror has been my friend. I am grateful that mirror time opens my heart to focus outside myself. Whether appreciated or not by others, the mirror confirms my importance in my roles if not my performance in life. [Guy adds: I still owe you a rewrite about mirror use and it’s super value to ladies.]

71. I am grateful just to recognize that loneliness comes from lack of feedback of my importance to others. (I’ve learned that just as action cures fear, new or different actions of mine help cure my loneliness.) [Guy adds: Words don’t program the heart but actions (and emotionally imagined outcomes) do. Different and winning actions reprogram it from old habits.]

72. Vanity has been with me since my earliest mirror time. I am grateful that my expressions of vanity lift my spirits and prepare me to tackle anything with much less anxiety. [Guy adds: Vanity eases or solves so many female problems at the mirror. It confirms self-esteem and dignity. Enhances prettiness, self-image, self-confidence, and self-gratitude. If she doesn’t like herself and/or doesn’t like the mirror, she’s doing everything wrong. The more she can’t handle mirror feedback, the more desperate she becomes for feedback from others, which is the root of wanting to desperately to be liked by both women and men.]

Example for your response: “72-F ” works okay to reflect your opinion of false to that one item. Also, comments are welcome and desired, especially if you take exception to anything.

 

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2060. Female Blessings at Birth — 58-60


I return to the project of asking for your agreement/disagreement on the long list of blessings that women inherit at birth. This is the 20th group of three blessings, and I’m grateful for your earlier responses.

With each item, do you agree that you and other females inherit it at birth? Or, is it something you and others learn later in life? False means that the item is missing completely from your heart, or it’s something you learned during life, or you just don’t think women are born that way.

In case you’re new to this blog or wonder why I compiled the list. I hope to close the gaps and shortcomings in the following causes and effects so that modern women can figure out better ways to lead better lives.

  • A woman’s happiness depends primarily on the gratefulness that accumulates in and shines outward from her heart.
  • Women can only be as grateful for others and things as they are individually grateful for who and what they are as a person, woman, wife, mother, girlfriend, granny, friend, church-goer, encourager, Christian, Jew, American, Korean, employee, and on and on and on…. The key term being grateful for self, self-gratitude.
  • Women will or should be more grateful for themselves as individuals. They need only acknowledge just how magnificently they have been designed, endowed, and energized to be the key players in life. That is, born to be compatible with themselves, others, and particularly a lifetime mate.

Where I explain or add comment with each blessing, perhaps I could be wrong in your eyes. Feel free to challenge me. I’m not trying to be right, just searching for and trying to describe truth. I search for the blessings that empower and encourage women to use their irresistible force to override the immovable object of male dominance, the superior sex vs. the dominant one. Women deserve it but they have to do most of the work to keep the battle of the sexes balanced in their favor.

I continue to ask for your opinion to confirm or deny, true or false.

58. While I never thought of it in these terms, I recognized early in childhood that dad’s authority status was higher than mom’s and parental authority exceeded that of children. While it didn’t keep me from challenging everything in life, recovery from my mistakes was aided by their superior ability and status. I am grateful for only driving them out of their minds instead of me out of their hearts. [Guy adds: After the conscious mind opens in the third year, girls become sensitive to the role that authority plays in their lives. They have the ability to automatically acknowledge authority figures, and how they will respond to the use of authority. Of course it doesn’t take long before they also learn to test authority figures, perhaps even to play one against another. Success breeds self-respect and self-confidence. Failure provides lessons learned as part of self-development. They learn quickly that authority can aid self-development. Boys are not born so resilient or quick as learners.]

59. The more I am grateful for others, the more important I am to myself. [Guy adds: And self-importance pumps self-gratitude into your heart. IOW, by finding gratefulness outside yourself, you magnify it within. You inherited the ability at birth—you can be grateful for yourself just by continually looking and finding it elsewhere. And, your happiness flows from gratefulness, both for self and others.]

60. Unless I can do nothing about it at the time, I love the ‘renewed self’ that pervades my spirit when I spend time ‘fixing up’ at a mirror. It encourages me to purposely make up to please myself for being so pleasant to look at. [Guy adds: It’s powerfully useful first thing in the morning. Departing the mirror with uplifted spirits encourages you in the role of importance to family and leads you dynamically to help others achieve success and you to achieve importance in the day’s events.]

Example for your response: “60-F ” works okay to reflect your opinion of false to that one item. Also, comments are welcome and desired, especially if you take exception to anything.

 

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