I deviated from my own self-image for explaining this subject. I’ll try to recover by summarizing the basics about these often-confused terms: self-esteem and self-image.
· Self-esteem means how one likes oneself as a person. It’s also used to compare one’s apparent value to that of others. Self-image is the picture one has of oneself and their place and importance in the world around them.
· The infant’s brain wires itself with self-esteem according to parental, family, and caregiver treatment. With actions, self-talk, and dreams, we continually program and reprogram our self-image throughout life.
· Development of self-esteem begins and ends in roughly the first three years of life. Self-image blooms after a child’s conscious mind opens and the child can make decisions about himself. The toddler’s picture of Self builds under the influence of personal accomplishments, real and imagined, good and bad, failed and successful.
· As a child ages beyond toddlerhood, self-image blossoms in the tweens and teens. Development accelerates and grows from conclusions about successes and failures. Also, a child’s dreams and imagination foster gigantic expansions of beliefs and convictions for the years to come.
· When your self-esteem takes a hit, you’re limited to temporary pick-me-ups. When you deviate from or violate your self-image, your attitude and outlook on life can change permanently.
· Three things develop self-image the most: (1) Accomplishments enlarge and improve it. (2) Imaginative dreams of the future stimulate expansion. (3) Self-talk explains, compensates, rationalizes, and otherwise makes everything all fit together in one acceptable picture of Self.
There remains one question that probably lingers in readers’ minds. When one’s self-image makes one like oneself, why isn’t that self-esteem? The question introduces tomorrow’s post.
What Women Never Hear 
This is very helpful data. I really appreciate the reversal of thinking this has brought. I have always know inside my role as a man as its hardwired in my DNA. What I ahve had trouble with is how some women see results of troble in their perception of parenting yet feel justified to lend continuing demise to the children’s short comings. Self esteem and self image have plaged my 12 year old son because his mother seems to think she is his father. Everything I do she seems to counter balance. He should be living with me I believe as he is in a house full of girls and women and he acts out always. He’s been suspended from school, suspended from the football team and then removed completely so he acts out to build himself up. He uses the “F” word to his mother constantly and he has never said anything like that to me. She thinks he doesnt want a relationship with me because he stays mad at me for not paying her more child support or more regular. Its hard for me to pay her when I lost all respect for her and that she has repayed not a single penny of agreed loans, cell phones monthly, car repairs, braces, and activities I paid for that I had not input. Ann Coulters book “Guilty as charged!” reports 40 years of govermental data supporting the facts. The majority of our incarcerated people in the U.S. come from single mother homes. She debut that book on “The View”. All the women on that show but one are single mom’s and really tried to beat her down…Facts, and me as a father of 5 and a very involved dad stand here with my hands tied as the ship sinks. She appears to be the captain of a sinking ship yet doesnt realize its sinking. My son is screaming “Help” yet I can do absolutely nothing. He is 12 and can decide where he wants to live. What would you do or whats the right thing to do. God has done much here and praying is all I can do. It makes me physically sick sometime. Also, can you teach me how to say all of this in less time and words. I think I talk too much and write too much…I have so much to say! Thanks Guy.
Dear Keith, I really feel for you and I hope and pray you will find your answers.
“When your self-esteem takes a hit, you’re limited to temporary pick-me-ups.”
I just now turned to this blog because I needed a pick-me-up…a lot better than chocolate, no? 🙂
Your Highness Eatacactus,
I love it when pretty women tell me that. But have a chocolate anyway.
Guy