Tag Archives: Femininity

2147. Three Little Words: How They Work


Those three little words are overrated. Oh, I don’t suggest they not be used. I suggest that due diligence be paid to the likely impact they have on the sexes, because they register differently both in delivery and reception.

A man’s words impact his mind but don’t program his heart. A woman’s words program both mind and heart. Her “I love you” leads her to also act it out, which reinforces that she does love him. It doubles the dosage of obligating her to him, because her heart and mind are much more closely interconnected than those of males.

Men are quite different in how they hear three little and other words. He hears them, but they don’t register deeply within him; they do little to impress him. His ears are not the sensitive and believable sensors that hers are. If her loving actions accompany or follow her words, then he can begin to believe her love. Men believe what they see and figure out; they don’t believe what they are told until they see evidence of actions that support and reinforce.

On the delivering end, a man says, “I love you.” It isn’t the same obligation that her words carry, because unlike women his words don’t program his heart. Unless his words originate with his heart as the result of his having acted over time as if he loves her, his words mean little although they may carry intent. (But what’s that old saying about the road to hell is paved with good intentions?)

That’s why commitment promised by men ends up disappointing women who act on a man’s words. Commitment primarily serves men, because in matters of love their words are relatively cheap while women value them the same way that women value their own words.

Manly devotion serves women, but it requires time, his actions, and her patience for a man to program his heart with actions that please him for pleasing her and that end up favoring her above all others. Her femininity, uniqueness, and patience keep him interested long enough for him to find virtues that accumulate into fascination and to whom he devotes his interest above all else. Then a man loves her (as women wish they would from the get go).

To men, words are for the purpose of getting what they want. They are hunter-conquerors and competitors. Words are their weapons when physicality is inappropriate; when might can’t make right; and when faced with feminine mystique, female modesty, and appealing vanity that they can’t comprehend much less understand well enough to compete for fear of losing.

In other words, the immovable objects of the dominant sex can be moved by the irresistible force of the superior sex when women pay less attention to masculine words, exploit their feminine nature, and induce men into figuring them out rather than the reverse.

 

7 Comments

Filed under courtship

2137. RANDOM THOUGHTS—Group 97


  • Modern women betray their best interests. They abandon their greatest strengths dealing with males: mystery, modesty, morality, manners, meekness, marriage, monogamy, mothering, and a self-imposed and unique majesty that commands respect from males. The fallout spreads across society and men assume greater dominion over women and their home together.
  • Feminism encourages men to spread their seed. Femininity rewards men for hoarding it.
  • Confused but ever alert for another conquest, men watch as females of all ages deal unsuccessfully with their mates. As relationships crumble, men exploit the females dumped into the pool of those so desperate to recover they are easy to conquer.
  • If a man is to compete energetically for one woman to keep for a lifetime, women must have something of greater value than just genitalia.
    Since all women have that in common, he’s lured by other rewards than just sex for husbanding and fathering.
  • Feminism expects men to suppress their masculine instincts and still please women. Femininity expects men to use their masculine instincts to prove themselves worthy of women, children, and family life.
  • Women seek to change their world but do not listen to men. They learn by listening only to women. Consequently, what women know about men is often wrong.
  • Men see things like this. Things don’t change satisfactorily unless men change them or have them changed.
  • Men don’t look for flaws in the woman they marry. Her qualities outweigh her shortcomings, so that’s good enough. Women are opposite. His flaws are both correctable and his being good enough depends on his qualities enabling her to work on his flaws. Consequently, men marry a good woman and expect her to remain good for him. Therefore, he’s blameless if she changes. Women marry a man with flaws correctable by her and expecting to make him better for her. She earns the blame if he turns out different than she expects. Out of that arises the foreigner in their relationship, undeserved blame for the other. Blame and compatibility are already mutually exclusive, and undeserved blame makes it toxic.

 

14 Comments

Filed under sex differences

2117. Compatibility Axioms #581-590


  1. Too many women reject this truism for making marriage work: Before they marry he should prove himself worthy of her. That is, she makes him the seller and her the buyer. He peddles all his strengths. She evaluates his character,  prospects of domestic responsibility, and likelihood of delivery on his promises. After marriage, she keeps herself worthy of him. That is, she becomes the seller and peddles rewards for his husbanding and fathering. [206]
  2. Pregnant women look like men whose appearance they dislike or detest. They use tight clothing and masculinize motherhood, spread feminist fashion, and visibly brag to please women. Not sexiness, attractiveness, and femininity, not what men appreciate even with mothers. [206]
  3. Thirtysomething women without kids have no outlet for their mothering instincts. So, they parent their man. [206]
  4. Wives treat husbands much less respectfully than they treat boyfriends, lovers, and shack up partners. Two effects: Husbands dump wives more easily. Other men see what happens, avoid marriage, and opt for shack up. [206]
  5. Women condemn the male ego, as if they have none of their own. The feminist movement made the female ego explode. Activists took advantage and promoted one sex’s willingness to blame the other. [206]
  6. Men seek a woman that accepts him as he is and wants to stay. Women nevertheless think they can or should change their man. [206]
  7. Sex is the man’s game. Females determine the rules and officiate, but men always win. Only men run an offense and they keep the score. [207]
  8. Relationships crumble as so much unmarried sex cheapens fidelity, breeds unfaithfulness, and threatens each marriage. Yet, men are blamed for lack of character facing all those easily spread legs. [207]
  9. After a one-night stand, he doesn’t call. He claims he loves her, but he doesn’t. He pledges his commitment, but it fades. Except when teamed with a man proven to be devoted to her more than to sex, copulation just leads to more easily being ignored. [207]
  10. Sex attracts, but it does not bond. The higher a single woman elevates sexual freedom in her priorities, whether real or symbolic, the less likely she will find a man to spend the rest of his life with her. [207]

 

1 Comment

Filed under Dear daughter

2100. 7th Anniversary, Tempus Fugit


Seven years ago tomorrow I posted my first article as declaration of war against Feminism. I titled it “Feminism Indicted.” I copy it here as still appropriate and the birthmark.

——

  • Feminism Indicted: Feminism is the philosophy of envy of men, the creed of anger at men, and the gospel of politics in relationships. Its inherent virtue merely equalizes unhappiness for women seeking or living with a man.
  • Femininity Acquitted: Femininity is the philosophy of attractiveness for men, the creed of faithfulness with men, and the gospel of devotion to one man. Its inherent virtue civilizes men, balances male dominance, suppresses male aggressiveness, inspires men to prove their worthiness, and rewards men for acting responsibly as both husband and father.
  • Feminism discourages male adoration of women. Femininity inspires it. Feminism demeans masculinity to get what women want. Femininity praises manliness to get what women want.
  • Feminism unleashes the savage male beast. Femininity tames it.
  • Anger energizes the politics of Feminism. Indirectness and modesty empower the cultural and domestic leadership of Femininity.

——

I started the blog with commitment to explain what women never hear and expected to post a few dozen articles. Now at 2100 I have become relatively devoted and intend to continue the mindset.

Those of you who comment make my duty more pleasant and enjoyable. Thank you.

 

38 Comments

Filed under Dear daughter, feminine, Feminism: OOPS!

2000. Compatibility Axioms #451-460


451. Sex does not bond men, but the opportunity for conquest conquers his attention and holds it tightly until a woman gives in. This facet of his nature enables virtual virginity to work for her. [154]
452. This puts the courtship agenda in her hands: (1) Her hard-headedness prevails over both her soft-heartedness and his hard-headed and hard-hearted persistence for sex. (2) She tests and retests him to be the potential right man for life together. (3) She continues to reject sexual relations at least until number two is proven and engagement or preferably marriage follows. [154]
453. The curse of modern adolescence is this. Girls too highly value boys and having a boyfriend. More so, in fact, than they value feminine, modest, moral, female-empowering, and self-protective behaviors. When boys butt their hormone-soaked heads up against the brick wall of ardent feminine standards, it teaches girls the well-hidden truths about the male nature and how to avoid future life as some guy’s ex. [154]
454. Women age most gracefully and charmingly when they intensify their natural femininity early in life. Duplicating the male persona ages women prematurely and leaves them with little grace and charm for their elder years. [155]
455. Women are naturally well-equipped with a cooperative spirit, indirectness, nurture-power, soft-heartedness, and natural but unoffending hard-headedness. These strengths help balance their man’s dominance. Each successful balancing event reinforces her efforts, strengthens her influence, and enlarges his respect. [155]
456. Extraordinary women arise from this model to hold the respect of men for life: She keeps herself looking pretty and modest, fairly independent, and attractive to men. However, she automatically tests any man she encounters as if for a relationship. She doesn’t relate well with those unworthy of her. It applies to all men, not just her man. [155]
457. Femininity in early life captures a man’s attention. Femininity practiced ardently over their years together gradually empowers her as family matriarch in later life. [155]
458. Femininity best improves a woman’s lot in life by inspiring a man to adopt her social and domestic values and expectations usually built upon her girlhood hopes and dreams. But it calls for indirectness, cooperation, patience, and charm used to admire his significance, demo her respect, and show gratitude for and dependence on who he is and what he does. [155]
459. Whether done by one or many women, feminine values and standards upheld strongly and persistently against unmarried sex go far toward reducing male dominance, aggressiveness, and violence. (First principle of masculine behavior: Men do whatever women require in order to have frequent and convenient access to sex. Second principle: Men even marry if that’s required.) [155]
460. He measures his manly prowess by her worth after his conquest. Much of her retention value hinges on it. He wonders roundabout and over time: Now that I have, who else conquered this woman, if she is to be anything more than a used sex target to me? [156]

3 Comments

Filed under Dear daughter

1997. Self-Gratitude — Recovery Is Still Everything


Remember the multiplex of misery? Unwanted singleness, disappointment, unhappiness, abandonment, loneliness, isolation, hopelessness, despair, divorce, depression, childlessness, dreariness, gloom, and prospects of doom. I can’t tell you how, but you can figure out how an inexpensive escape is possible and practical. The mirror is your interstate exit.

To depart the multiplex for a more agreeable life, take this exit ramp. 1) Find or rig a mirror before which you can sit in privacy. 2) Have a copy of the list of default attitudes at hand. 3) Determine to spend a prescribed amount of time every morning at the mirror. For the first three months, sit for at least 30 minutes. 4) Share each default attitude item by item with your reflected best friend. 5) Analyze and compare the upcoming day with the list. Look for attitudes that can improve whatever challenges/problems you expect. Follow that by analyzing and comparing all else in your life—yourself, your nature, and those people and things of importance to you. Weigh those things against each item on the list. 6) Select and commit to strengthening those attitudes that have hope for resolving whatever problems you see ahead. 7) Determine before others start their day exactly what they will encounter in you. Kind, friendly, upbeat, helpful, encouraging, enterprising? Or firm, hardened, obstinate? Competing for dominance or cooperating for harmony? In gentle control of self or demanding that others listen to your gripes? Dependent on self or others to lift your spirits?

How you start the day determines how the day turns out. How you dress for the day determines how you act during the day. How your morning demeanor strikes your family determines how they like or dislike their day. Your finish of the day improves when you start the day by taking control of yourself, and well-programmed time at the mirror enables it best.

Restore vanity and modesty to your life and appreciate the results. Learn to identify the roots and appreciate the effects of newfound gratefulness. Continue it daily until you become a woman totally happy with yourself and thus capable of breathing the same spirit into those around you. That is the intended role of woman.

Like nothing else can, your reflection will reveal who and what you really are. Self-talk with that best friend will reveal how to fix problems, resolve issues, handle disruptive people, maintain relationships, and ultimately morph your reflection into the hopes-and-dreams kind of life you envisioned as a girl. The benefits to self are potentially endless. Here’s how and why it can work for those who can figure and work things out for themselves.

  1. Deep-rooted and natural femininity conquers the masculine spirit. Men yield to the superior and uplifting spirit of females as long as it doesn’t appear that way to the men.
  2. Men are neither born to be happy nor very interested in earning it. If they gain it, fine, but no big deal if they’re not as happy as women crave. However, women are born to be happy, but you have to earn it. You do so by finding gratitude in things and people of importance to you.
  3. You became aware that you’re a female about the third year of life. You also became aware of your girlish gratefulness for yourself, which grew as you developed (although adults may have fed you many discouraging thoughts and the pop culture finished the job as you morphed into an adult).
  4. You’re a person entitled to the best life you can produce. Also, you’re either in or out of a relationship as the result of choices you made. You have free will, made your own choices, and have already paid some cost with more costs to come. Room exists for improvement, which provides better options to choose from, which lowers the emotional cost to you.
  5. You are your own best problem solver! Not any man, not even yours! He’s but a helper. You are naturally endowed to be and do the best for you.
  6. Women have two magnificent abilities that men lack. You can read other people, and you are the best fixer-upper of self. Reading men enables you to maximize both yours and your man’s influence and effectiveness. Self-inspiration and self-talk work better than pressure and frustration to fix up your spirits, confidence, and influences within your relationships. To do it super-well, however, requires huge amounts of self-gratitude, which are findable at the mirror.
  7. Escaping boredom at the mirror pushes you to examine and compare everything in your life. Out of those things and the default attitudes in your female nature, you can discover ways to gain more control and smooth out your life.
  8. The mirror enables two mentally healthful operations. 1) You peer inside yourself to see what no one else is allowed to see and much less understand. 2) You look in with what’s on your mind, and your reflection reveals what’s in your heart. Your mirror-time job is to rectify the differences, and the more you side with your heart, then the easier you find more femininity and more gratefulness for who and what you are in the world around you.
  9. When selfishness enters your mind, your reflection squelches it. Truth conquers because selfishness is not part of the female nature. (It’s a behavior usually learned in childhood.)
  10. Using self-talk brings on the self-fulfilling prophecy. SFP: We are all influenced and tend to live up to the expectations of ourselves plus those of others who play important roles in our lives.

Now, that’s a batch of promises. They don’t come quickly or easily. Out of it, however, a happier life can emerge. At least the multiplex of misery can be lightened or avoided. It starts with mirror time.

 

9 Comments

Filed under feminine

1992. Self-gratitude — Just What Is It?


Self-gratitude is the habit of claiming gratefulness for who you are and what you do. It keeps your heart overflowing with your importance and worth as person and as female fulfilling your multiple roles in life. Self-gratitude floods your heart when you follow and reinforce your natural feminine qualities pretty much as God intended, Nature trains, and hormones push you.

Created to be good, you do good by following your heart. When you reinforce your self-gratitude daily, it enables you to focus on life outside yourself, which in return confirm your claims of self-importance and add to your self-worth.

In modern life this seems almost a universal fault. Influences contrary to self-gratitude are inculcated in childhood and doomed to continue later in life. As the direct result, women pay too little attention to keeping their ego sufficiently protected, self-love sufficiently inflated, self-worth sufficiently appreciated, and self-gratitude sufficiently reinforced, that is, DAILY.

And it works in reverse to simplify and ease a changeover. Even if you have to fake it for awhile, you can adopt individual default attitudes and find yourself doing that for which God designed, Nature endows, and hormones energize you. You don’t copy or act like men. Instead, you act uniquely different, take pride in it, and expect to be honored for it. It makes you worth what men are willing to pay in lost independence in order to have you for a mate.

On the other hand, to the extent you copy masculine characteristics, you lose self-gratitude. For example: 1) Promiscuity steals your joy. Joyless women can’t be very grateful. 2) Competing with husband drives him away. While you may be grateful for winning battles, it vaporizes on losing the war. 3) Sloppy appearance destroys manly interest. Grateful for attracting male eyes reinforces your self-importance, but its absence weakens self-love, self-confidence, and self-worth.

The more intense is your self-gratitude and more wide-spread across your personality, character, and roles in life, then the more capable and influential you are. Your relationship expertise expands, and you’re more capable of fixing relationship issues. It also prepares you better to deal with all aspects of life.

The shortage of self-gratitude waters down other gratefulness that is essential for your happiness. Serendipitously, the more grateful you are for yourself, the more grateful for others and things. But the reverse doesn’t work. With insufficient self-gratitude, declaring your gratefulness for others and things actually forces comparisons that question and weaken self-gratitude.

However, recovery is everything and each woman is capable. More to follow when the default attitudes are posted soon.

As a modern woman, even though member of the superior sex, you lose macro and micro influence and negotiating power in direct proportion as you lack self-gratitude. The reverse is also true. The greater is your self-gratitude dealing with men and their natural expectation to dominate women, then the greater is your influence in matters concerning other self-interests. Men lose negotiating power when you rectify your life with great gobs of self-gratitude. Living up to your nature is living up to something bigger than yourself, and also endows you with the moral high ground.

When you exploit your natural femininity, you focus less on present matters in exchange for greater influence in shaping the lives most important to you. You promote compatibility and maintain harmony the easy way. Moreover, you contribute somewhat to universally helping men find the satisfaction and women the happiness they respectively crave. It’s your self-gratitude that empowers your awesomeness over men and female opponents on matters of your heart, life, and future.

 

6 Comments

Filed under feminine