2861. Male Fantasy Realized

Another cultural debasement of females slips in under the awareness of Americans. It’s intended to slyly convince more people that sex for pleasure is the primary sex drive in humans. IOW, bring the excesses developed in porn houses into the home, and even women will learn to like it.

In no way do I seek to belittle the pleasure in sex. I condemn the motivational force that sponsors and encourages people seeking sex for pleasure. It’s not the pleasure that damages relationships, it’s the pursuit that betrays the goodness in human character—of which women should have the greater concern about avoidance.

I dispute it. I seek to convince women that it’s egregiously bad news for their gender, female life, and especially to capture and keep a man permanently and fulfill the hopes and dreams inherent in the female nature, to which it’s contrary.

My objection is primarily based on this principle of human life. Sex for pleasure always demands more the next time; what do you think makes porn expand into ever increasing and ever enlarging versions of tools and new orifices to attack? How does anal fisting appeal to females without it being a follow on to whatever went before?

Hooked on pleasure, one can’t get enough and expects more the next time. New tools, new ways, new refreshments, extra sensations, or new sources to exceed what went before. Men lead and drive the bus, but dumb women provide the fuel. Men get what they want, and women don’t realize how their lives are being changed from what they want as they miss the more important things in life. When relationships are dominated by sex for pleasure, the woman can’t achieve what she expects of life.

Actually, the sexes are designed against sex for pleasure. If it were part of our design, our most primal motivational forces would not be so obvious in our behavior. IOW, sex for pleasure, as you will see, is the aberration and not the standard. At birth both sexes inherit other motivational forces that govern their sex lives.

Both sexes are born to get their way associating with others. Women are born to recognize very early in life they have a valuable birthright that men will honor when each woman respects herself deliberately, sufficiently, and defensively against first penile penetration. That birthright difference enables women to get their way with men who are stronger, dominant, and intent on conquest and quick departure. Discretion to participate sexually belongs to each woman, and she’s adequately prepared from early girlhood to capitalize on her own success.

Her side of the “when to yield” puzzle looks like this. Five natural motivational forces energize sex in the woman’s world:

• Born with a physiological urge to nurture, it triggers the urge to procreate.
• She has a psychological need to assuage the wants of herself or the needs of someone else, either of which can stimulate her to copulate.
• Possessing the primal need of self-importance, free will, and urge to get her way, it ignites ambitions to outdo and outshine other women as a candidate for mating. She empowers herself by negotiating sex such that she earns her own uniqueness and the respect of men or man; each man’s respect being essential for his love to arise.
• She comprehends the worth of sexually yielding to each man, especially the uniqueness and value of their first sexual encounter together. (When she finally yields to one man, he paid whatever price she demanded. He easily convinces himself that he ‘owns’ her, expects not to compete anymore with her, and that she will cooperate with him and his ambitions. It’s the male nature in action.)
• She needs intimacy, and it is a prime motivator for yielding sex. (Her nature craves intimacy; she can almost never get enough from her man. Especially when her spirits are down, which can be quite often. Intimate touching, fondling, caressing, and sweet words that enhance body closeness fuel a woman’s willingness or desire, which makes it easier to continue deeper into the process to please herself, her partner, or even make an unanticipated mistake.)

The wisdom inherent in the feminine nature empowers women to utilize sex for bonding, generating compatibility, and competing with other women. (Neither promiscuity nor orgasmic pleasure is natural to the female gender. Both arise from lessons learned in life about the urge to feel better or important about oneself, however momentary that may be.)

Those natural urges enable women to think they understand the male sex drive. Not so.

Primal motivational urges energize four versions of the male sex drive. These bring proactive sex into a man’s world:

• His interest in sex brings females onto the playing field. Without the urge to conquer, women can be ignored.
• He has a deep-rooted, unchangeable, and physiological urge to copulate with every female he finds attractive and maybe some beyond attractive. (Women witness but can’t comprehend the meaning behind this phenomenal and most primal expression of male sex drive.)
• He has an instinctive competitive urge to outdo and outshine other men. In response, he seeks to conquer women that other men can’t, enable bragging rights by doing so, and add boaster’s value to virginity.
• He possesses a steadfast ambition for frequent and convenient access to sex, and he’s willing to pay a high price for it, if and when the right woman coaxes, coaches, and loves him into paying her price.
• He has an instinctive craving to do something pleasurable with each erection, and instinct pushes him toward penile penetration of a vagina. (Penetration completes his conquest, goal achieved. Beyond first penetration, however, he’s just another sexual performer—good, poor, wasteful, selfish, indifferent.)

Orgasm is not a prime motivator of men. Pleasurable and rewarding, yes, but not a driving force until it’s about to arrive momentarily and as expected.

Those primal sex urges combine to make men compete with other males for females and compete with females for conquest—but for little else afterward. After conquest, he’s beat out other men, he paid her price, and he expects cooperation from the woman he ‘owns’. He refuses to compete further with her. Men reliably find a way out or avoid competing with a conquered woman. Even if she’s a keeper and they marry, if he has to compete with her, she loses much of her likeability.

Why? Conquest changes their relationship dramatically. He used his persuasive interest achieving conquest, in ‘buying her’. IOW, he paid whatever price she demanded. Job’s done; she’s his. Afterward she belongs to him, and he expects cooperation. He’s now free to pursue others. He may lose significant arguments to her. So why take the risk of her winning and his losing the upper hand won with conquest? Men are not dumb; they only seem to be that way because women don’t understand how men are born to be different.

Even though born to be compatible as mates, the sexes differ greatly on matters of purpose, love, and sex. Society and life in it are as peaceful and satisfying as both sexes live according to their nature, the way they are born. Things start to fall apart, when the sexes begin for whatever reason to act like the opposite sex and thus betray their respective nature.

In which case, women lose dominance of cultural values, standards, and expectations. Men run society according to male dominated and female-unfriendly values, standards, and expectations. Neither sex appreciates or respects the other very much, blame spurs anger, and children self-develop to tunes played on the quarrelsome tongues of disrespectful parents, teachers, and adults.

Those primal sex urges combine to make males compete with males for females and compete with females for conquest but for little else afterward. Sex for pleasure as a motivational force curtails and probably ends the female friendliness of sexual relations according to their respective natures.