Her Highness Violet asked how men view women called beautiful by conventional versus non-conventional standards. For example, those shaped with ‘rounded” features (Bridget Bardot, Marilyn Monroe, Angelina Jolie) compared to those with “chiseled” features (Angelica Houston, Sarah Jessica Parker, Sofia Coppola).
A woman’s interest lies with attracting, capturing, and marrying a man. Female-identified standards of beauty add value to each woman. Such standards help attract, may help capture, but do little to hold a man. Once attracted, men operate on a different wavelength regardless of how they stare, ogle, offend, and enjoy females exhibiting themselves. Stir his loins and she holds his interest, but that doesn’t mean he’s ready to venture beyond romantic love.
Romantic love fades in a year or two, and the foundation of enduring love lies with beauty as effect rather than cause. Both the cause and enduring love rise out of whatever promise she holds for him.
If pushed a man may call it beauty, but he looks for the aura of promise that surrounds her as a person. Females of promise may include an acquaintance, daughter, date, sex object, friend, sister, her as mother, his own mom, object for dreaming or fantasizing, addition to his significance, or whatever female role generates his interest. Her beauty lies embedded and perhaps indistinguishable within her total promise for him.
If promise is present, his sense of beauty is there. No guy wants to associate with someone lacking beauty; if a woman of promise isn’t pretty, her man will find a way to call it beauty. For example, one guy says: “My wife’s wonderfully kind heart gives her a beauty I love.” Another says: “My mom’s beautiful.” Men call movie stars beautiful, but the beauty that triggers men to value beauty differs from female expectations.
In the end, modern women stimulate what they don’t want. They use the celebrity beauty standards described above to attract men. The social and domestic effects keep men focused on women and sex much more effectively than on one woman and family.
Men initially see women as sex objects. Each female’s aura of promise to a man determines her beauty. Perception is reality, so whatever appears to be, is. It begs the question: How to generate such an aura?
Her promise for enduring male interest lies indistinguishable in her appearance, attitude, self-respect, and feminine neatness at preparing herself for others to see. Men rise to the challenge of her indistinguishable nature (aka mysteriously feminine and unreadable). Out of the challenge, he pulls her promise for him. Men appreciate what they accomplish more than what’s given to them.
What Women Never Hear 