2119. Her Hair: Crowning Glory or …???


It’s time. I’ve put this off for years for fear of losing readers. Damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead.

It’s recurrent. Women keep asking what men prefer for the female hairdo. Women concerned with that issue are out of step with Nature and flummox themselves dealing with men. I offer a contrarian view more in accord with both the male and female natures.

Hair is important to women, not men. Men are not that interested in one of a woman’s features. Oh, some men will claim they like to waller their face in a woman’s long hair. But that’s more adolescent than adult behavior. And some praise long stringy hair these days because it’s popular. It generates comfort for men that all women look alike. Popularity keeps single women bowing to masculine tastes.

It may change after a relationship is established and working smoothly. A husband should have some say, about which wife understands what is required to keep the marriage promoted in her favor. She can figure out what’s best for them.

We’ve heard all our lives that hair is a woman’s crowning glory. Glory for whom? Not men. They don’t see glory there. Glory flows from her heart at what she sees, cleans, likes, loves, strokes, pats, combs, dyes, tinges, cuts, and waves until it becomes a useable feature to make herself feel better about herself. Hair care compensates for guilt. It relieves depression when she modifies her vision of herself. It keeps her tied to her mirror, where her independent spirit emerges and she finds solace living with herself. A hundred strokes a night isn’t wasted time or energy; it inflates the female ego.

Her hair is her crowning glory for self-centered reasons: It enables her to glorify herself, promote the image of who she is, elevate her confidence, compensate for low self-esteem, make herself feel good caring for it, express her natural vanity to herself, match up better or differently with her other features, and otherwise reinforce her appearance and roles in life to suit her and no one else. Hair is just a part of her package of prettiness that she aspires to make prettier. Adjusting her hair care practices to please others defeats some objectives in life.

To wear her hair to please men—especially after about age 25 when getting a man becomes problematic—is to push her into other actions to please men, diminish her choices, retreat from single independence, reduce her ability to stand out from other women, and in general curtail her ability to appear unique. When women seek to follow what’s popular, they lose ability to be extraordinary. Which is, of course, what men seek to marry.

 

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2118. Compatibility Axioms #591-600


591. Unmarried sex causes couples to over-commit and under-connect. [212]

592. Her value continues upward increasingly to every man that chases her, until she yields. People instinctively value more highly what they can’t have than what they gain and then ‘own’. [212]

593. Everybody makes mistakes. Recovery is everything, and virtual virginity enables it for past sexual mistakes/experience. [212]

594. Avoiding life as an ex comes much easier to the woman that elevates and honors her sexual assets even above marriage. [212]

595. By her refusing to have unmarried sex, she forces a man to prove himself worthy of her and capable of fulfilling her expectations for home and family. If it doesn’t work that way, then he’s after sex and not her. [212]

596. Scoring with a hard-to-get woman elevates a man’s sense of significance, but it’s more ego than conviction, more temporary than permanent, more fun than bond. [212]

597. The woman that a man respects and honors adds to his convicted sense of significance, whether they are sex partners or not. That is, he’s more satisfied with himself by treating her more respectably/honorably.[212]

598. Refusing to have sex with an attractive man requires womanly strength of character to keep from turning him off. Hard-headed feminine gentleness helps and self-dedication wins. [212]

599. A woman’s biggest challenge is to keep from being eager or desperate to have a boyfriend, dates, hubby, or sex, or whatever else she thinks she has to have for the short term. [212]

600. Women seek affection and fear abandonment. Uncrossed legs before marriage is not mutually bonding, which short-circuits affection and increases likelihood of being dumped sooner or later.  [213]

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2117. Compatibility Axioms #581-590


  1. Too many women reject this truism for making marriage work: Before they marry he should prove himself worthy of her. That is, she makes him the seller and her the buyer. He peddles all his strengths. She evaluates his character,  prospects of domestic responsibility, and likelihood of delivery on his promises. After marriage, she keeps herself worthy of him. That is, she becomes the seller and peddles rewards for his husbanding and fathering. [206]
  2. Pregnant women look like men whose appearance they dislike or detest. They use tight clothing and masculinize motherhood, spread feminist fashion, and visibly brag to please women. Not sexiness, attractiveness, and femininity, not what men appreciate even with mothers. [206]
  3. Thirtysomething women without kids have no outlet for their mothering instincts. So, they parent their man. [206]
  4. Wives treat husbands much less respectfully than they treat boyfriends, lovers, and shack up partners. Two effects: Husbands dump wives more easily. Other men see what happens, avoid marriage, and opt for shack up. [206]
  5. Women condemn the male ego, as if they have none of their own. The feminist movement made the female ego explode. Activists took advantage and promoted one sex’s willingness to blame the other. [206]
  6. Men seek a woman that accepts him as he is and wants to stay. Women nevertheless think they can or should change their man. [206]
  7. Sex is the man’s game. Females determine the rules and officiate, but men always win. Only men run an offense and they keep the score. [207]
  8. Relationships crumble as so much unmarried sex cheapens fidelity, breeds unfaithfulness, and threatens each marriage. Yet, men are blamed for lack of character facing all those easily spread legs. [207]
  9. After a one-night stand, he doesn’t call. He claims he loves her, but he doesn’t. He pledges his commitment, but it fades. Except when teamed with a man proven to be devoted to her more than to sex, copulation just leads to more easily being ignored. [207]
  10. Sex attracts, but it does not bond. The higher a single woman elevates sexual freedom in her priorities, whether real or symbolic, the less likely she will find a man to spend the rest of his life with her. [207]

 

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2116. Compatibility Axioms #571-580


571. A woman that appears very ordinary stales fast in the face of erotic scenery outside the home. [203]

572. Men are born hard-headed and hard-hearted. Women are born hard-headed but soft-hearted. It takes years to soften his heart, and her going soft in the head doesn’t help her but stops softening of his heart. Experts aren’t very effective when their thinking goes mushy. [203]

573. Modern women market themselves poorly. They put all their eggs in the advertising basket, use cheap packaging, and ignore product quality. They advertise sex, dress cheaply, groom carelessly, and think and hope that sex will both capture and hold a man. One-night stand, yes! Hold, no! [205]

574. Sexy apparel and exposed skin precisely focuses a man’s interest on conquest. After conquest, he may or may not focus on her other interests. [205]

575. By fishing with sex as bait, she yields dominance and sex to him. This minimizes her negotiating power and puts their future in his hands. [205]

576. Sex needs no advertising. It sells itself, and advertising it cheapens a woman for everything but sex. [205]

577. Women need high quality packaging to project the appearance and confirm the fact of an extraordinary female—the kind to whom men marry and stay married. [205]

578. Regarding her appearance, if she doesn’t protect her self-respect, display self-confidence, and reflect self-esteem, she lacks quality for much more than temporary gigs with men. [205]

579. Modest attire, attractive grooming, and high-standard feminine behavior create a mysterious quality that intrigues men. It elevates a woman toward keeperhood. [205]

580. As women go, so goes society, and feminine mystique, modesty, and morality drive the best bus for females. Exclusively advertising sex makes a woman miss the bus. She’s left behind to get run over by men. [205]

 

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2115. Female Blessings List “Repaired”


I under performed but have now recovered. I never compiled all and completed the entries to “Female Blessings at Birth” as shown at blog top. Numbers 1 through 97 are now posted in complete form. All are presumed true except as you ladies disagree and return an F for false.

Moreover, I merged the other page, “Her Blessings and His Admiration,” which will be taken down as redundant.

The completed version of “Female Blessings at Birth” is now shown in three parts and may read awkwardly at first until you get the rhythm. Her gratefulness expressed in first person as she senses it. Her blessing shortened as others see it and shown in third person. His admiration (or sometimes just reaction) shown in second person.

The newness and completeness of it all begs your attention.

 

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2114. Female Blessings at Birth — 97


Her Highness That Horse is Dead inspired this 97th blessing to be added to Female Blessings at Birth at blog top.

Your comments help and I continue to seek your T or F as each registers within your heart of hearts.

I present it in first person, female.

  1. I’m grateful that I always know what I want and expect out of a man. Not so much particular behaviors but results that accumulate and brighten my future. [Guy adds: Consequently, women test endlessly to determine and ensure they are on track as each woman expects it with each man. Her Blessing: She knows what she wants and has the patience, instinct to rely on indirectness, and flexibility to accept less than ideal behaviors in order to fulfill her expectations of results. His Admiration: The better she knows how to get what she wants, the more respect she deserves.
  2. (I know there are more blessings to come. I await suggestions and inspiration. Target remains set at 100.)

If you disagree with #97, please register it with an big, fat F for false.

 

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2113. An Enigma of Nature


Here’s something I wrote more than a year before the blog.

Early in a marriage a man sees himself as indispensable and expects his wife’s behavior to reflect it. He doesn’t pay attention to whether she is essential or not, until their first baby awakens him to the subject. After that, she gains slowly. Not because she is not deserving, but because he is not thinking about it. He takes marital obligations as satisfied by him and maybe takes her for granted. But after a man spends many pleasant years with a woman, he fully recognizes her essentiality and that it existed all along.

Provided, that is, she plays her cards right. Marital success requires this tradeoff be honored by the relationship expert. She makes him appear as the essential one in the early years. Then, hope and certainty of her importance brighten her future until finally he becomes Mr. Right and she becomes his well-honored queen, mate, and dearest friend.

Instant gratification as the most important person in the relationship—as sought by modern women—defeats the marital process and wifely hopes and dreams. It’s just the way men and women are made.

 

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